Many a bride has been overwhelmed by that stressful, loaded question: “Who should I ask to be my maid of honor?” Not to gloat or anything, but I was super lucky to be totally unburdened by that sticky situation — choosing my maid of honor had been a given since the second I got engaged, well, really since I was born. My sister, duh.
Okay, so I know I’m also lucky in the fact that my big sister Grace and I are BFFs — not every sibling duo has this. But regardless of how close the two of you might be, or the other details of your sister-sister relationship, you can’t argue there are some MAJOR benefits to choosing your sister as your maid of honor, or even your brother as your man of honor.
Here’s definitive proof that sisters make the absolute best maids of honor.
Your Bridesmaids Can’t Be Upset With Your Decision
Back to that original question — how do I choose my maid of maid of honor? And, more specifically, how do you choose your maid of honor without hurting anyone’s feelings? Easy — pick your sister. Brides might get the rep of being totally self-absorbed bridezillas, but in actuality, the real reason we’re so crazed is because we’re worried about offending EVERYONE — our future mother-in-law, our own mom, our wedding planner, and, of course, our bridesmaids. Picking your sister as your maid of honor disqualifies the other bridesmaids from being ticked off or jealous that you didn’t select one of them for that coveted top spot. Okay, so they might still be a tiny bit sad that they won’t be standing immediately next to you on your big day, but they know deep down that they just can’t argue with siblinghood.
She Knows How to Handle Your Parents…
Those with overbearing moms (ain’t that all of us though?) need a buffer between themselves and the MOB. Think about it this way — your best friend of 10 years might be able to break it to you that “no, girl, you can’t pull off a flower crown” but when it comes to telling your mom “no, Judy, the bridesmaids should not all wear purple bridesmaids dresses just because that was the color your bridal party wore 40 years ago” her fortitude might falter a bit. Your sister, on the other hand, grew up in just the same house with the same mom and dad. She knows when and how to push back, and what battles to not even try to fight. Most importantly, she’s able to do this on your behalf — so you don’t have to deal with the minor parental mishaps.
...and How to Handle You
Even more crucial than handling the dad - or momzilla, your sister can handle the bridezilla. She knows what’s going to make you upset, and how to break bad news to you. So maybe your beachside rehearsal dinner venue got nixed last minute because of crazy high wind speeds, and now your wedding party is going to be stuck in a windowless conference room for the evening (true story) — your sister will be by your side with two glasses of rose saying, “Screw it, it’s all about tomorrow anyway, baby girl.”
She Can Be Straight With You
When I wanted to have my bachelorette party be Disney Princess-themed, my sister gave it to me straight: “Morgan, we’re 27, not 12.” I saw the error in my ways, and in the end, I was really grateful to not have countless social media posts of me as Elsa, and my brides-man as Aladdin. It was really for the best.
She’s Already Up on All the Family Drama
You don’t have to explain to her the deep-rooted divide between your family from Oklahoma and your family from California — she already knows it, lives it, and, best of all, can manage it far and away from your bridal sensibilities.
You Can Be Totally Honest With Her
With a sister as your maid of honor, you’re able to be completely honest with her — which is such a relief because, trust me, wedding planning is just walking on a bunch of egg shells with your other family (and soon-to-be family) members. It was so refreshing to be able to be totally upfront and honest with my sister about my bachelorette party preferences, bridesmaid dresses, and more, whereas with a friend as my MOH I might have felt like I had to tip-toe around her feelings.
She Has a Lifetime’s Worth of Memories to Include in Her MOH Speech
Those shared bathtime days? Check. That time you wore the same red swimsuit for two straight weeks at sleep away camp? Check. Your actual first impression of your almost spouse? Check. Check. Check. Your sister knows you through and through, and you better believe that those amazingly embarrassing moments are making it into her maid of honor speech, whether you like it or not. But really, you know it’s going to be the best speech ever.
She’s Not Just Excited for You — She’s Excited to Be Gaining a New Sibling
One thing that made me SO happy going into my wedding day was seeing just how excited my sister was to have my fiancé as a brother. I already knew I was making the right choice in my future husband, but seeing my sister bond with him as her own sibling during our engagement was just confirmation that he really is the one for me.