what is with the no cash bar stand?

Yikes. I would be pretty embarrassed if my husband acted like that...

We had free soda, water, tea, coffers and punch/lemonade. But hard alcohol was a few bucks. No one had a problem with it but I did let everyone know ahead of time.

FMS - I think we all agreed that the wine/beer service was more than enough. What I (and others here) have a problem with is brides assuming your guests want to get annihilated, that they don't want to "pay for you to get sloshed", or would rather spend money on other frivolous things that don't ensure your guests have a good time. It really is this prevalent attitude toward the guests that gets me riled. Case in point - Shannon C's FH saying stuff about the amount of money we spend gassing up our "pathetic" cars and saying stuff like "This goes for most of you Americans as well." What is that even supposed to mean?

If you can't do an open bar or provide alcohol at your wedding for any myriad of reasons, just own it. Don't put the blame on how your guests "might" act if given a few adult bevs. Unless, of course, all your friends are morons.

^high fives Heather

@ Heather, I have no clue what Matt was talking about with the American remark. I can see some brides being legitimately concerned with sloshed some guests. I was worried at our wedding, as I knew some guests (won't mention whose *DH *COUGH* *COUGH*) aren't the most mature people to begin with, and we did end up with a broken window costing us $260. But you can't make a genrealization that ALL guests will get crazy drunk. Although, I imagine there are some weddings out there that it does happen...

People are strange when it comes to money. I'm going to guess it's easier to say "Cash bar because I don't want to pay for guests to get sloshed" than "We can't afford to pay for alcohol"

I know there are some of my friends who would get sloshed if given the opportunity.... I'm very afraid for my MOH's boyfriend. He drinks all the time and doesn't always understand what is appropriate and not. So though 90% of the people coming to my wedding will not get "sloshed" there are some people who would. So I can see peoples points on not providing the opportunity for people to get drunk off their @ss. but i also agree that most people are big kids and wont drink to much.

I completely agree with what Heather just said about owning it if you can not provide it. I do get them impression that there is blame being put on why it cant be done.

Like I stated before, it is your wedding, you can choose to do what you want, how to spend your money and how you want to make your guests feel.

@HEather - I was thinking of starting a Rent-a-Moron service. I come to your wedding, get trashed, make a total butt of myself...and then everyone in attendance can say, "no more open bars!" thereby saving future brides and grooms a fortune.

LMAO!!!!!

SHANNON RUN!!!!!!!! SAVE YOURSELF!!!

Love @ Shannon S.

Shannon... what are you doing Oct 29? :-)

Ok, I don't have to run, do I? I'm a little lazy...oh, wait, not me.

For the record, my DH has no issue with open bars or cash bars, but he does have an issue with rude people.

Heather - I was thinking I'd kick off with some tequila shots, then do the Robot, then maybe the Worm, then I'll sob in a corner and finish up by leading your grandparents in a rousing rendition of "Danny Boy" while flashing my finest ruffled panties. What time should I be there?

From a grooms standpoint and learning more about the wedding planning process everyday i had to chime in on this particular topic. My awesome fiancee has planned a wonderfull reception. Having been to many weddings with both open and cash bars i believe that at least soda coffee water and tea should be provided. The reception being for the guests of the ceremony.They should be at least informed if any cash bar is going to be provided so that they can plan accordingly. Nothing worse then showing up to a reception with a cash bar that takes no credit cards and no atm available.

We can't afford to have a fully stocked open bar. but most of my guests are driving a good ways to get to our wedding so it'd be some doodoo on us if we just left them high and dry. so we have more than enough beer and wine for everyone. dont be a dookiebrain about it.

First off, I would advise not to be rude to your guests or you will be better off eloping. Second, I am having a dry wedding because most of my family does not drink and most of the people invited know that it is a non-alcoholic wedding and don't mind. Remember, they are doing YOU a favor by coming. Be at least courteous.

Hmm - I think my FSIL might already have those particular bases covered. Perhaps you could drink so much that you puke and clog up a toilet in the ladies' room and not tell anyone? Also, you could join me and FH on the dance floor for our first song to "I just can't stop loving you" by Michael Jackson. And sing along. Loudly. While doing the robot.

Shannon and heather should make it down to houston this weekend and tear it up at my wedding with my dickhead fiance.

@ Shannon, need a wingman for your new Rent-A-Moron business?

@Robert, yes, please let your guests know. I went to one wedding that was a cash bar and had no clue. Thank goodness for FH cause at least he had money.

Heather, I was thinking I'd mistake your first dance for a game of Red Rover, and just bust on through.

Irin, I was thinking you could wheel me out on a handtruck at the end of my performance.

Shannon S. I want to hire you, I can then have someone to do tequilla shots with!