Dry Weddings

Maybe I try to see the glass half full and I'd like to think that everyone thinks about their guests which may not always be the case. For us (partly due to budget) we are only doing free beer and soda, but we did take our guests into consideration and we are doing a photobooth. We want them to have a good time. They made the effort to come and celebrate with us, the least we can do is make it as enjoyable as possible.

So wait Yardiegirl, what are you expecting to go home to? No one tells anyone to have a wedding reception, we choose to do that. You spend what you can and try to have the best party you can, what are you expecting?

Kind of gives legs to my theory that some people only have a "reception" to get gifts.

Again, Yardiegirl we have never said that if you can't afford it you still have to do it, but I do have a problem with a girl wearing a $1k dress and not service alcohol because of "budget issues". To me as a guest that person isn't considering my enjoyment at all in that situation.

I, personally, don't even want any gifts. I have everything I need already so that's not even a thought in my mind.

When I said "..Nothing to go home to." I mean they spent $70k on a wedding, which is one day, and didn't even have a TV in their house when then went home. That's what I meant.

and CandiM - that might be the reason some people have weddings but that should not be it at all.

Haven't read the entire thread because I'm sure I know what was said.

To the OP and your actual question...You have two options, No response, let people be snotty about it. They have the choice to attend or not.

Option 2, tell them it's the way you have chosen to do things for personal reasons and you would love to have them attend but understand if they don't.

Good luck!

We had a dry wedding mostly because DH's parents are older, very conservative Christians who would have been extremely uncomfortable if we had alcohol, so it was important to us that they enjoyed the day. The majority of our guests wouldn't have drank anyway, and it wasn't something that was important to us. I didn't hear any complaints, and I will guarantee that no one was checking their watches to see when they could leave. Everyone had a great time, and raved about our reception and the food.

That being said, we had an afternoon reception and provided non-alcoholic drinks. I never would have expected people to dance and party with a glass of virgin punch in their hand.

We also went out with the wedding party and a few close friends that evening and got a little tipsy

You do not have to spend $70,000 to have alcohol at your wedding. My budget was $11,000.

My wedding will be dry, but it'll also be a brunch reception at a fellowship hall inside a church. My friends can just deal with it and go out with us that night. If they're rude I'll tell them just that. Our wedding isn't huge and the friends we've invited are close enough to us that I don't mind to say just that.

April J., I don't think anyone would expect alcohol at a brunch held in a church building.

At the end of the day, you know your guests better than anyone. And if your guests are the types of people that would be snotty to you because you're not serving alcohol, then more power to you. There's no way I could be associated with those types of people. The alcohol, or lack there of, definitely wouldn't make my reception!

Alcohol can be expensive, but to the point of others on this topic so can many other things. I think we have all adjusted our budgets to have what we feel is most important. It is crazy how some people will "go broke" paying for a wedding. Our goal is to have everyone paid and not have a balance owed to anyone when our evening is said and done. Remember you will still have a mortgage the next month. LBVS

I agree with Mrs. Covington, I knew where this thread was going before I read it. People aren't saying they don't want to attend, they're just saying, "aw, shucks, there's no booze." I won't be getting drunk at my wedding, I know my FH won't, I know many other friends will, but none of them would say, "Oh, I'm not coming then," if we were to have a dry wedding. Back to your question, I'd just shrug, "is what it is," and if alcohol really is just that important let them not come and then explain later that the reason they didn't come was for the fact there was no booze. I doubt however, that your attendance is going to dwindle because of a dry wedding. These folks care more about you than a bar, and if they don't, THEN you can reevaluate your friendship. In the meantime, don't take it as rough as to mean, "well then, this is BS. F the Redmonds."

***QUESTION FOR ALL THE DRY WEDDING BRIDES:

If WW randomly selected a bride to win free alcohol for their wedding reception - would you turn it down?

I agree with everyone else, own the reason why you are doing it. You don't need to make up excuses, if it's an expense you don't want - then fine.

No you don't have to spend $70k...that was just an example of someone doing too much for other people to see

Sharon, I would because for me it is not the expense. It is a decision our families have decided is not a necessary addition to our reception. BUT I would ask WW to consider a different prize for us as the winner.

I like how Future Mrs. Redmond isn't even responding to any of the 7 page comments lol

I don't envy couples who have alcoholics in their families (as I am guessing may be the situation here, because she does not say that the cost of alcohol is the problem). It has to be a tough choice and a bad position to be in. I don't think I'd make the same choice, as in my experience a dry wedding is not by any means a foolproof answer to having alcoholics around, but I also wouldn't make snotty comments if I were invited to her dry wedding. If I were her, though, I would not assume that anyone who expressed negativity about the lack of alcohol would only otherwise have come for the booze. That is quite an insulting assumption and really is no better than the guests making snide comments. Bad attitude, meet bad attitude - won't make for a fun wedding or future relationships with people who are important enough to the couple to invite to their wedding.

It really all depends on the family & friends you are inviting to your wedding. If you are very religious and none of your friends nor family partakes in drinking then yes, a dry wedding makes sense.

All I know is that with the crowd I hang out with ... alcohol is expected. I've been to once wedding where there was no alcohol except for the wedding party & it was by far the worst wedding i've ever attended in my life. No one was dancing, No one was mingling, No one wanted to be there.

YOU TAKE AWAY MY WEEKEND EVENING I NEED MY MARTINI !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

@Alondra I'm sure she understands that this is a hot topic. She obviously has already made her decision and from what I see a lot of the responses aren't even answering her question..so what does she need to respond to?

When things get out of hand, the point is pretty moot, Alondra