7 Things You Shouldn't Be Afraid to Say to Your Bridesmaids
Your true friends will want your day to turn out perfectly, so don’t be afraid to tell them what you want.
Photo: MyLife Photography
While you never want to be the kind of friend who bosses your closest pals around, don’t forget that it is your wedding day and if you want things to look and go a certain way (without going totally overboard), you deserve it!
Your true friends will want your day to turn out perfectly, so don’t be afraid to say these things to them. We’re sure your squad will happily oblige.
Will you send me a picture of your dress before you buy it?
If you’ve given your ‘maids a general color scheme, length, and fabric to adhere to but left the dress decision up to them, it’s totally acceptable to ask them for a picture so you can give your final approval. You’ve already given them a good amount of leeway, and what you see as mint green may be different from what your friend sees. If you don’t like the dress she pulled, try giving her gentle advice like “I imagined you in a lighter color,” versus saying no to the dress completely.
Please wear your hair up or down for my wedding
It’s understandable that you’d want your pals to look somewhat uniform (especially if you’ve let them pick out their own attire). Asking the girls to all wear their hair in an updo can still give them some free rein to incorporate their Pinterest inspiration. Plus—asking them to don one style may cut help cut the total primping cost if you’re paying for their ‘dos.
Don’t drink too much at the rehearsal dinner
This should go without saying but if you have a friend who tends to get a little crazy sometimes, it’s totally okay to ask her to keep her wild side at bay. Approach the situation kindly by saying something like, “My grandma’s going to be at the rehearsal and she’s a little on the conservative side.” Hopefully, she’ll get the hint. Besides, who wants to be a hungover bridesmaid on their BFF’s wedding day?
Can I meet your date before the wedding?
If you’ve given your ‘maid a plus-one so she can bring her S.O. to your wedding, but you two haven’t had the chance to meet yet, feel free to ask them on a double date with you and your fiancé(e) to grab drinks or dinner before the wedding. It’s definitely reasonable that you wouldn’t want a complete stranger at your nuptials, and your bestie would probably love the opportunity to introduce you two!
Please wear X colored accessory
It’s totally acceptable to ask that your girlfriends wear a certain color shoe or necklace. If they’re donning navy blue dresses, you may want them to pair it with a neutral heel. Don't get too specific about the style of the necklace or shoe, unless you're planning to gift it to them as a way of saying thank you. Give them a color family to work with so they can dig into their closet and find something that works. If you’re working with two major colors for your wedding palette, asking your ‘maids to wear one of those hues in accessory form is a great way to work them into the attire.
Don’t mention X in your maid of honor speech
If there are certain embarrassing moments from your childhood years or hilarious college moments that shouldn’t be shared when your dad’s in earshot, let your MOH know to avoid those things. If you give a valid reason as to why you don’t want them mentioned, like it would upset a guest or if it feels inappropriate for the occasion, she should be happy to keep it out of her toast. Let those silly stories out during the bachelorette party!
Will you help me with this last-minute task?
Whether you need help alphabetizing escort cards or packaging favors at the very last second, get the gang together, grab some champagne, and finish it as a team. They’ll probably be more than willing to help tie up all the loose ends before you get hitched!
