Jayla
Champion October 2025

Which came first: sending your save-the-dates or asking your wedding party?

Jayla, on December 11, 2018 at 11:05 AM Posted in Planning 0 102
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What did you check off of your planning checklist first? Was it sending out your save-the-dates, or officially asking your friends or family to be in the wedding party?

Which came first: sending your save-the-dates or asking your wedding party? 1

Photo by Marina Rey Photography in Greensboro, NC


Next Question: Which came first: deciding on your first dance song or your songs for parent dances?

Back to the Beginning: Which came first?


102 Comments

Latest activity by Michelle, on December 29, 2020 at 4:44 PM
  • Kenisha
    Champion June 2019
    Kenisha
    • Flag
    I asked my wedding party first. I haven鈥檛 even sent out my STD鈥檚 yet 馃ぃ
    • Reply
  • M&M Bride
    Super September 2018
    M&M Bride
    • Flag

    We asked our bridal party before sending out the save the dates!

    • Reply
  • Tamara
    VIP August 2019
    Tamara
    • Flag

    Save the dates since we aren't having a wedding party.

    • Reply
  • Alexandra
    VIP June 2019
    Alexandra
    • Flag
    Half and half! I asked my bridesmaids right away and then we sent out our STDs! My FH is dragging his feet on *officially* asking his groomsmen (they know they will be in the wedding perf though, he just hasn鈥檛 asked - despite my gentle nudges!).
    • Reply
  • Caytlyn
    Legend November 2019
    Caytlyn
    • Flag

    Wedding party was asked at a year out from our original date (August 2018,) STDs will go out 8 months from our new date (March 2019.)

    • Reply
  • Nemo
    Master August 2018
    Nemo
    • Flag

    We never sent save the dates! H asked his guys the week after he proposed and I asked my girls 7-8 months out.

    • Reply
  • Angerra
    VIP August 2019
    Angerra
    • Flag
    I asked my wedding party before sending out the STDs. I asked my ladies in August and STDs were sent out at the end of October.
    • Reply
  • B
    Super July 2018
    Brittany
    • Flag

    We asked our wedding party 13 months out and sent save the dates 11 months out since we were having a Friday wedding in the summer with many out of state guests and people that book vacations early

    • Reply
  • Jayla
    Champion October 2025
    Jayla
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment

    Lol!! Is he planning on doing something special to ask them? Or is he keeping it simple?

    • Reply
  • Jayla
    Champion October 2025
    Jayla
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment

    Asking the wedding party seems to be one of the first things couples do!

    • Reply
  • Kenisha
    Champion June 2019
    Kenisha
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    You鈥檙e right Jayla. It does seem like that. Unfortunately, a lot of couples end up having issues with people in their bridal party. By asking people too early you run the risk of problems arising.
    • Reply
  • Gen
    Champion June 2019
    Gen
    • Flag

    Asked our wedding party first! FH said he didn't want his groomsmen to receive their save the dates without knowing that they were part of the wedding already haha. So he insisted we both ask our whole bridal parties before sending them out Smiley tongue

    • Reply
  • Alexandra
    VIP June 2019
    Alexandra
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    Ha! He wants to do something unique! Still unsure of what that means but honestly him officially asking his groomsmen is the least of my wedding worries Smiley laugh
    • Reply
  • Brae
    VIP September 2019
    Brae
    • Flag
    Asking our wedding party. We probably won't send save the dates until February for our September wedding, but I do have them. Gotta work on getting addresses.
    • Reply
  • JustKidding
    VIP April 2018
    JustKidding
    • Flag

    We didn't send STD's. lol.

    We asked our bridal party pretty early. We knew who they would be before even getting married.

    • Reply
  • Across The Stars
    Devoted October 2019
    Across The Stars
    • Flag
    Wedding party came almost immediately! Not sending out save the dates until January
    • Reply
  • Abby
    VIP March 2019
    Abby
    • Flag
    We already had our wedding party pretty much picked out before we got engaged and asked everyone within a week or two!
    • Reply
  • Nikita
    VIP April 2019
    Nikita
    • Flag

    I asked my wedding party before I even looked at stationary designs. They were contacted within the first week we officially started planning.

    • Reply
  • EllieRose
    Expert February 2020
    EllieRose
    • Flag
    Wedding party because our wedding was two years away!
    • Reply
  • BrandiWeds18
    VIP May 2019
    BrandiWeds18
    • Flag

    Definitely wedding party, i just sent save the dates.

    • Reply

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