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Paige L.
Super January 2021

What things do you refuse to have at your wedding?

Paige L., on September 3, 2019 at 8:39 AM

Posted in Planning 271

Hi everyone! While wedding planning, I have noticed that if I try to focus on all of the things I would want in my dream wedding, I either get overwhelmed by the vision or sad to think that, no, I can't afford to rent the most beautiful china and glassware with matching sterling silver cutlery. What...

Hi everyone!

While wedding planning, I have noticed that if I try to focus on all of the things I would want in my dream wedding, I either get overwhelmed by the vision or sad to think that, no, I can't afford to rent the most beautiful china and glassware with matching sterling silver cutlery. What I find better is think of the things I refuse to have at my wedding! If I just make sure those things aren't a part of my day, I know I will have a great time.


What are some of the things you refuse to have at your wedding? For example, I HATE mashed potatoes and green beans (the texture just is so wrong to me), and my caterer will not be allowed to bring those within a 10-mile radius of my reception.

271 Comments

  • Paula
    Super September 2019
    Paula ·
    • Flag

    Absolutely no hard liquor and and no cheesy love songs ie Michael Bolton

    • Reply
  • Lyndsay
    Dedicated September 2020
    Lyndsay ·
    • Flag

    No bad food...my fiance insists on a plated meal and is being pickier than I am over the food. We are not having a choreographed dance, no garter or flower toss, no favors that will be left behind or thrown away...

    • Reply
  • Chrysta
    Rockstar November 2021
    Chrysta Online ·
    • Flag
    Omg girl, I’ve been doing the same thing!! It’s so easy to get caught up in the “dream wedding” (which would bankrupt me LOL)! If you just focus on the “absolutely nots” instead, it makes decisions much easier! I refuse to wear a white dress. I also refuse to have a buffet or cash bar at my reception.
    • Reply
  • Taylor
    Savvy September 2021
    Taylor ·
    • Flag
    A TV for whatever football game is on that day! Several have suggested it...I say absolutely not!
    • Reply
  • B
    Dedicated November 2019
    Bethany ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    I loooovve mashed potatoes and we’re having them at our wedding. 😊
    • Reply
  • B
    Dedicated November 2019
    Bethany ·
    • Flag
    No garter toss or bouquet toss
    No burlap, mason jars, or wood slices
    No glass marbles in floral arrangements
    No father daughter dance
    Yes garlic mashed potatoes
    Yes green beans
    Yes Beyoncé
    • Reply
  • Ashlyn
    Dedicated December 2019
    Ashlyn ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment

    You took the words RIGHT out of my mouth! Except I'd extend that to *any* cliche, dumb wedding songs.

    • Reply
  • Diana
    VIP December 2019
    Diana ·
    • Flag
    Absolutely no bouquet or cater toss!! 🤦🏻‍♀️🙄 We’re also not having any beer, wine or alcohol either (church rules).
    • Reply
  • L
    Devoted August 2019
    Leaves232 ·
    • Flag
    I’m enjoying reading the responses to this topic! My wedding was 2 weeks ago and here was my “absolutely not” list:


    Photo Booth - Sorry, but they’re played out in my opinion

    Favors - I’m sentimental and take them but I always see tons left behind at friends’ weddings so I did not want to waste the effort and expense.

    Guest Book - As a guest, I never know what to write in these things and the table is always in some random corner that many guests overlook. Also, most of my guests wrote heartfelt notes in their cards, so it would definitely have been redundant to have a guest book.

    Bouquet Toss - I’m in my 30s and trying to get my single friends excited about catching the bouquet would’ve been awkward to say the least.

    Father/Daughter and Mother/Son Dance - My husband and I don’t have that type of relationship with our parents, ‘nuff said!




    • Reply
  • Aleaj
    Expert October 2019
    Aleaj ·
    • Flag
    Lol reading these comments i am dying laughing! I must be the cliche bride because i am doing a choreographed dance to Beyoncé before i let go, serving mashed potatoes, doing the bouquet and garter toss, and playing all of the line dances! Too funny! 🤣🤣🤣🤣

    The only thing I’m not doing is a first look! But i am doing one with my dad!
    • Reply
  • Jenni
    Dedicated September 2021
    Jenni ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment

    Yes this exactly!! I am my own person. I can 'give myself away'.

    • Reply
  • Paige L.
    Super January 2021
    Paige L. ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment

    Hey, that's alright! As long as you a providing well for your guests, you do you at your wedding!

    • Reply
  • Susan
    Devoted October 2020
    Susan ·
    • Flag

    No "Here Comes the Bride" or other 'traditional' music during the ceremony... No smashing cake in each other's faces... No garter toss or bouquet toss... No first look... My dad is walking me down the aisle but not 'giving me away'... No extra candy/cookie/popcorn/cereal bar of any sort... No burlap or mason jars... No hard alcohol... No father-daughter dance... No peonies (they're gorgeous, but going in a different direction!)... I just want to have fun and relax. I ultimately don't want to be hung up on a checklist of "to do's" just because there's a list of traditions we "should" follow...

    • Reply
  • M
    Dedicated May 2020
    Millicent ·
    • Flag

    No smashing cake. I'm not paying this much for makeup only for cake to ruin it. Besides cake belongs in mouths, not on faces.


    No father-daughter dance. My dad doesn't dance, and I don't care that he wouldn't dance with me.


    No garter toss or removal.

    • Reply
  • Taylor
    VIP October 2020
    Taylor ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    I feel like my colors are very “fall” (navy, taupe, small amounts of maroon) so I didn’t feel the need to go overboard with decor!
    • Reply
  • Alexandria
    Beginner October 2019
    Alexandria ·
    • Flag
    I refuse to have a garter toss. Also I refuse to have any music by Michael Jackson played at my reception
    • Reply
  • Yoice
    VIP March 2019
    Yoice ·
    • Flag
    I don’t know if this applies but I refused to not have fun! I spend a year and a half planning the wedding and I wanted to dance all night long and really celebrate our marriage. Of course we were the host and the hot topic so we went to all 5 tables say hi to people took pics and hit the dance floor. I danced until it was time to go. I wanted everyone to have fun and even with a wedding under 50 guest my dance floor was full at all times.
    • Reply
  • Morgan
    Savvy October 2019
    Morgan ·
    • Flag
    Absolutely hate jean material and burlap... No hay or barrels. The country vibes aren't for me. Our venue is awesome for so many reasons, but I hope the shed they disguised as a barn isn't in any photos. I hope this trend is almost at it's end. So over it!
    • Reply
  • Hailie
    Savvy May 2021
    Hailie ·
    • Flag

    No Cake Smashing. I do not want cake on my face all night after that. Also, we are not doing a First Look my FH does not want to ruin the experience of seeing me for the first time before I walk down the aisle. No Confetti or harmful substances to the earth will be a part of our send off. Smiley smile

    • Reply
  • D
    Dedicated October 2019
    Dawn ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment

    Interesting notation on the "cake in the face", lol. This has nothing to do with this forum, really....just a tid bit if you are interested...I have heard and read several times that throwing cake in eachothers face is a sure sign of the marriage not lasting vs. gently feeding eachother the bite. It shows respect for eachother. Cool, huh? Take note at all future weddings, lol.

    • Reply

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