Paige L.
Super January 2021

What things do you refuse to have at your wedding?

Paige L., on September 3, 2019 at 8:39 AM Posted in Planning 3 242
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Hi everyone!

While wedding planning, I have noticed that if I try to focus on all of the things I would want in my dream wedding, I either get overwhelmed by the vision or sad to think that, no, I can't afford to rent the most beautiful china and glassware with matching sterling silver cutlery. What I find better is think of the things I refuse to have at my wedding! If I just make sure those things aren't a part of my day, I know I will have a great time.


What are some of the things you refuse to have at your wedding? For example, I HATE mashed potatoes and green beans (the texture just is so wrong to me), and my caterer will not be allowed to bring those within a 10-mile radius of my reception.

242 Comments

  • Taylor
    Expert October 2020
    Taylor ·

    I refuse to have the Cha Cha Slide and Cupid Shuffle for music. Also not doing BBQ because I hate it and will not welcome the idea of pumpkins "because it's a fall wedding". No, thank you

  • Amber
    VIP February 2020
    Amber ·
    View Quoted Comment

    Aw come on, no cha cha OR cupid shuffle? Perfectly understandable, I only like those songs because I'm hopeless at "dancing" otherwise LOL

    I refuse to have liquor at our reception, my wedding will not be an excuse for our families to get plastered and act a fool Limited beer and wine it is!

  • Paige L.
    Super January 2021
    Paige L. ·
    View Quoted Comment

    My FH has also banned those dances! Oh man, I feel like every Pinterest board you see for fall weddings are just full of pumpkins. Are you using anything else to bring the season into your wedding or are you (like me!!) planning the decor without really caring what the season is?

  • Anna
    Expert August 2020
    Anna ·

    I refuse to do the whole garter toss thing. Would be awkward for my fiancée/his family. Also, let's be honest... the dress is heavy... it's going to be sweaty. LOL.

  • Courtney
    Super September 2019
    Courtney ·
    I don’t personally mind them but my SO has banned any form of mason jar lol.
  • Ivy ORP
    Rockstar October 2019
    Ivy ORP ·
    View Quoted Comment

    Agreed. I LOVE fall and pumpkins but they don't exactly go with our beach venue.

    We have decided no tosses of any kind. I will not have a bouquet or a garter for the ceremony, and I don't like pointing people out like that.

    Since her mother has passed and her dad can't make it for health reasons we will not be doing specific parent/bride dances. I'll just grab my dad during a good song if he's up for it.

    No chicken dance!!!

    No shots! We will have plenty of beer, wine, and champagne as well as a signature drink but felt we wanted to skip anything shot related.

  • Erin
    Devoted November 2019
    Erin ·
    No Macarena.
  • Erin
    Devoted November 2019
    Erin ·
    We’re also not having any hard liquor.
  • Denise
    Super September 2019
    Denise ·

    I refuse 5 year old party decorations! Just because our budgets small doesn't mean it has to look cheap or tacky.

  • Krysta
    Devoted September 2019
    Krysta ·

    I refuse to have the garter toss/bouquet toss. We are doing an Anniversary Dance instead.

  • Kate
    Devoted November 2019
    Kate ·
    View Quoted Comment

    I nixed the bouquet and garter toss too! I will have a bouquet, but have *hated* having to participate in the bouquet toss at all of the weddings I've been to up until now. I always knew that I wasn't going to do it at my wedding.

  • Laura
    Rockstar October 2019
    Laura ·

    I refuse to allow Beyonce's single ladies to be played for the bouquet toss. I can't stand her and I hate the song. I also refuse to allow any rap music unless it's old-school 80's. We hate rap. While we are tossing a garter, we refuse to have the guy who catches it do anything with the woman who catches the bouquet. I've seen to many near fights with significant others getting jealous! We also refuse to all the cake smash to the face. The last think is NO FIRST LOOK. We both hate that

  • Yam
    VIP September 2019
    Yam ·
    “Mixed vegetable/vegetable medley” is not allowed near me period, let alone my wedding. Veggies deserve better! They’re delicious and so often in weddings they just become a bland side dish. It’s a crime, I tell you!

    No mention of obeying anyone in my ceremony. I don’t like it. I don’t obey or serve my FH, that would imply he’s above me in some way. We’re equals.

    NO BURLAP! My skin is super sensitive and burlap makes me so itchy! It’s everywhere now, in every store with a wedding section. It’s like they’re covering the things I want to buy in barbed wire. 😰 So even if I think it looks pretty, keep that stuff away from my wedding.
  • Izzy
    Devoted April 2021
    Izzy ·
    There will be NO line dancing or Macarena... and no fake flowers. Also, there will be no bouquet or garter toss! (I find them degrading) however I would not be opposed to a tame cake smash
  • Ivy ORP
    Rockstar October 2019
    Ivy ORP ·
    View Quoted Comment

    We will be having a big celebration with friends at another friend's bar before the wedding and both of us will have rainbow garters to toss but will not make it a single or married thing. Just a who wants to catch the garter thing.

  • Priscilla
    Dedicated April 2020
    Priscilla Online ·
    No cheesy love photos.
  • Ivy ORP
    Rockstar October 2019
    Ivy ORP ·
    View Quoted Comment

    OMG the obey thing was never going to happen for us either. I mean, heteronormative nonsense much? I feel you on the mixed veggies too. What a crime. I haven't been a fan of burlap at all anyway so why is it literally in every wedding aisle???

  • Shannon
    Devoted June 2020
    Shannon ·

    No unity candle, sand ceremony, glass mixing, hand fasting, cord tying, or wine ceremonies! To each their own, but to me the whole wedding is a 'unity ceremony', so I've never understood the point? It seems like a trend that took off in the last 10 years

  • Wendy
    Dedicated April 2020
    Wendy ·
    No garter toss, no boquet toss, no cake smashed in faces. No macarena, YMCA, or chacha slide.
  • Wendy
    Dedicated April 2020
    Wendy ·
    Oh and no Mason jars

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