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Abbey
Beginner June 2020

Is my dress "right" for my situation?

Abbey, on January 5, 2020 at 8:14 AM

Posted in Wedding Attire 236

Hello everyone, A little background... I'm 37 years old, mother of two, and this is my second wedding. It's in 5 months and the ceremony will be in a garden outside a banquet hall. I was married too young the first time around and always felt my dress looked too frumpy/cute. This time around, I...

Hello everyone,

A little background... I'm 37 years old, mother of two, and this is my second wedding. It's in 5 months and the ceremony will be in a garden outside a banquet hall. I was married too young the first time around and always felt my dress looked too frumpy/cute. This time around, I feel like a "woman" and I'm less (but not by much) modest nowadays. I am not into fashion and having 15 years between weddings makes me feel out of touch. I'm literally the only female in my family (my fiance, two sons, my brother, his partner, my father, and three male cats), so I don't get girly often.

Dress shopping was emotionally charged as I lost my mother a year and a half ago to cancer. I was really missing her presence and I felt uneasy the whole experience. She was my best friend. She always said I needed A-line in everything (I'm pear shaped with a short torso). (Photos are pre-alteration).


I had two girlfriends with me who are so positive and way more up to date than I am on trends etc. When I put it on, my friends and the store stylist raved about how amazing it was. I felt confident and beautiful. I know my fiance would love the back especially Smiley winking I left feeling like I got a steal. I'm also on a budget. I bought this dress off the rack, and got 60% off. I have a friend that can do alterations affordably.


In true "me" fashion, I'm now second guessing the whole thing. My brain is fretting: Sale is final. It's too revealing. It's not right for my age. It's not what I had originally planned (modest, sleeves, mature). I have no business wearing something sexy. My mother wouldn't have approved. My back is exposed. Will I be able to dance? I've never worn anything form fitting before.... and on and on.


Now, my sons are more excited about the wedding and their roles in it than me sometimes. They have been so happy about me marrying their "bonus dad." Their dad and I had a strange, platonic, marriage and so they don't understand and aren't old enough to get that I want to be attractive for my new husband. I showed my ten year old and he said, "Mumma! Why do you want to be see through!!" and he looked uncomfortable. I asked my cute little jumping bean of a 7 year old, "do you like mommy's dress?" He smiled and said, "Nope!" and ran off to play some more. That's what has me the most worried.


I would love your honest opinions, because I'm clueless. I won't be hurt! But I'm pressed for time and I really need to be at ease. If that means shopping again, I should do it soon, and find a way to resell before it gets altered. Thanks!

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236 Comments

  • I
    Just Said Yes February 2020
    Idary ·
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    That is beautiful; you look gorgeous in it. Congratulations😊
    • Reply
  • Brandee
    Just Said Yes April 2020
    Brandee ·
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    Beautiful dress boo!! PERFECT
    • Reply
  • Geraldine
    Beginner June 2021
    Geraldine ·
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    Beautiful dress you look stunning
    • Reply
  • Jessica
    Just Said Yes February 2022
    Jessica ·
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    I love it 🥰🥰🥰
    • Reply
  • Kay
    Beginner December 2020
    Kay ·
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    That dress and the smile you are wearing with it...absolutely perfect. That is definitely the one.
    • Reply
  • U
    Just Said Yes October 2021
    Unity ·
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    Its beautiful!!! Go for it!!!
    • Reply
  • Rachel
    Savvy November 2021
    Rachel ·
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    You look absolutely freaking gorgeous!

    • Reply
  • E
    Just Said Yes June 2021
    Elli ·
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    You look gorgeous! Wear this dress! Smiley smile

    • Reply
  • Chloe
    Just Said Yes September 2020
    Chloe ·
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    I personally think this is gorgeous! Based off of the text, I was expecting to scroll down and see some Las Vegas style dress. This is very classy and gorgeous in my opinion
    • Reply
  • Kelsie
    Devoted March 2020
    Kelsie ·
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    Oh my gosh this dress is absolutely gorgeous, especially for a garden wedding! You look so beautiful in it!! Totally keep it!

    • Reply
  • Jessica
    Savvy July 2020
    Jessica ·
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    The dress look made for you. Its perfect. You are who the designer had in mind when they made this dress.

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  • K
    Just Said Yes June 2021
    Kristy ·
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    Its beautiful! Smiley heart

    • Reply
  • Kylie
    Just Said Yes October 2020
    Kylie ·
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    Oh my gosh I love it!!! Great choice, you’re beautiful!!

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  • Julia
    Dedicated October 2020
    Julia ·
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    I think you look beautiful!!! And will be perfect for the venue you described. It sounds like your momma would want you to be happy and I’m sure when she saw the smile on your face she would love the dress. My opinion you made a great choice!
    • Reply
  • K
    Savvy October 2020
    Kelly ·
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    It looks perfect. It is your dress! ...no not the one you are wearing or got from the store...it was made for you and your wedding.

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  • Karen
    Just Said Yes May 2021
    Karen ·
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    You look stunning!!! Your momma would be beaming just seeing that smile of yours in the dress. You have nothing to be uneasy about.
    • Reply
  • Deirdre
    Savvy January 2020
    Deirdre ·
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    I just got married this past Saturday in a similar dress, except mine was strapless. I am 52! I felt stunning and you will as well. It was also my second time around as well and was married in my church. I had a finger tip veil over my shoulders and felt perfect and beautiful. I am generally pretty plain, no make up and low maintenance and live in hiking clothes or pajamas (since I work from home). But this is your wedding and special day, and I don't do bling or sequins, both my dress and yours this are lace, bridal and gorgeous. Wear it, please! My man loved it as well!

    My dress Is my dress "right" for my situation? 1


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  • Peachypie
    Dedicated January 2019
    Peachypie ·
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    I think this is beautiful on you. It's not overly sexy and not too revealing. You have a beautiful shape and I don't think it's too form fitting, but compliments your shape and has beautiful detailing. I absolutely LOVE the back. I felt the same about my dress on my wedding day, but it was perfect for me and I love it more now than ever.


    Gonna be honest, I'm totally judgy and just don't get these super sheer, half naked, all kinds of body parts on display type dresses and this is nowhere near that level of dress. You look just right. I love it on you!

    • Reply
  • Earazona_
    Dedicated October 2026
    Earazona_ ·
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    You look absolutely stunning! I would say go with it girl! Work it. 💖 I love love love the fit on you for sure. Every woman needs her sexy beautiful moment, and this is yours. 😁
    • Reply
  • Vona
    Just Said Yes May 2021
    Vona ·
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    You and that dress are beautiful! The dress is lovely on youSmiley smile.

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