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Abbey
Beginner June 2020

Is my dress "right" for my situation?

Abbey, on January 5, 2020 at 8:14 AM

Posted in Wedding Attire 236

Hello everyone, A little background... I'm 37 years old, mother of two, and this is my second wedding. It's in 5 months and the ceremony will be in a garden outside a banquet hall. I was married too young the first time around and always felt my dress looked too frumpy/cute. This time around, I...

Hello everyone,

A little background... I'm 37 years old, mother of two, and this is my second wedding. It's in 5 months and the ceremony will be in a garden outside a banquet hall. I was married too young the first time around and always felt my dress looked too frumpy/cute. This time around, I feel like a "woman" and I'm less (but not by much) modest nowadays. I am not into fashion and having 15 years between weddings makes me feel out of touch. I'm literally the only female in my family (my fiance, two sons, my brother, his partner, my father, and three male cats), so I don't get girly often.

Dress shopping was emotionally charged as I lost my mother a year and a half ago to cancer. I was really missing her presence and I felt uneasy the whole experience. She was my best friend. She always said I needed A-line in everything (I'm pear shaped with a short torso). (Photos are pre-alteration).


I had two girlfriends with me who are so positive and way more up to date than I am on trends etc. When I put it on, my friends and the store stylist raved about how amazing it was. I felt confident and beautiful. I know my fiance would love the back especially Smiley winking I left feeling like I got a steal. I'm also on a budget. I bought this dress off the rack, and got 60% off. I have a friend that can do alterations affordably.


In true "me" fashion, I'm now second guessing the whole thing. My brain is fretting: Sale is final. It's too revealing. It's not right for my age. It's not what I had originally planned (modest, sleeves, mature). I have no business wearing something sexy. My mother wouldn't have approved. My back is exposed. Will I be able to dance? I've never worn anything form fitting before.... and on and on.


Now, my sons are more excited about the wedding and their roles in it than me sometimes. They have been so happy about me marrying their "bonus dad." Their dad and I had a strange, platonic, marriage and so they don't understand and aren't old enough to get that I want to be attractive for my new husband. I showed my ten year old and he said, "Mumma! Why do you want to be see through!!" and he looked uncomfortable. I asked my cute little jumping bean of a 7 year old, "do you like mommy's dress?" He smiled and said, "Nope!" and ran off to play some more. That's what has me the most worried.


I would love your honest opinions, because I'm clueless. I won't be hurt! But I'm pressed for time and I really need to be at ease. If that means shopping again, I should do it soon, and find a way to resell before it gets altered. Thanks!

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236 Comments

  • Haley
    Dedicated February 2021
    Haley ·
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    No that dress is absolutely beautiful!!!!!! I love it sooooo much’ that is exactly how I envisioned my dress looking! You look amazing in it and I feel like it fits you without me even having to know you!!!!
    • Reply
  • Nicole
    Beginner October 2021
    Nicole ·
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    Omg it looks AMAZING! Regardless of your age or situation, if it feels right to you then go for it! You look stunning.
    • Reply
  • A
    Beginner March 2020
    Ambrosia ·
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    Omg! You are absolutely stunning! This is the perfect dress for the situation. Literally gives you just enough sexy with just enough elegance too! You are beautiful!
    • Reply
  • Alisha
    Rockstar April 2021
    Alisha ·
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    Your dress is beautiful and you look beautiful in it. Wear the dress, it fits you
    • Reply
  • Dayna
    Expert September 2021
    Dayna ·
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    It's absolutely beautiful. It may feel uncomfortable/revealing if you aren't used to tight or low-cut clothes, but honestly, it's still pretty modest and you look amazing in it!

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  • J
    Savvy March 2021
    Johnnie ·
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    You look stunning!! Don’t you dare return that!
    • Reply
  • Kim
    Savvy October 2024
    Kim ·
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    I think you look amazing and I dont think it's too sexy or revealing at all. It's very flattering on you so I say stick with it, its absolutely gorgeous!
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  • Catherine
    VIP November 2019
    Catherine ·
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    I think you look absolutely stunning!!!!! i say keep the dress if you love it. if you're uncomfortable then return it

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  • Robyn
    Just Said Yes April 2021
    Robyn ·
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    You look absolutely beautiful in that dress and I think it suits you perfectly.
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  • Joy
    Savvy March 2020
    Joy ·
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    I think you look absolutely amazing. The dress is very elegant, beautiful and sexy. I love lace always feel it gives a elegant but yet sexy appeal for any women regardless of age. Age is just a number and you look beautiful. Don’t give much thought to it, your smile says it all...💕
    • Reply
  • E
    Just Said Yes September 2020
    Eboney ·
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    That dress is beautiful and you look great in it...it’s not revealing anything in my opinion. The kids aren’t used to you being girly so they are gonna shoot down any dress you put on due to it being out of ur normal daily attire. I say lift your head up and walk down the isle with confidence because you look beautiful.
    • Reply
  • Greta
    Beginner July 2020
    Greta ·
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    YOU ARE GORGEOUS!!! Oh my lanta I am obsessed with how well this dress fits you! It’s actually similar to my dress, but I’m personally going to add some lace in between the sweetheart neckline to make myself more comfortable because I like to be covered too! It’s clear from the genuine smile on your face that you love the dress so keep it! If your marriage is half as amazing as you look in that dress it’s going to last forever!
    • Reply
  • Gabriela
    Just Said Yes November 2020
    Gabriela ·
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    Omg!!! You look absolutely stunning! You even look super young. Don’t listen to anybody and rock that dress!
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  • Kaycee
    Just Said Yes January 2021
    Kaycee ·
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    THIS DRESS>>>>>> You look so beautiful and happy in it.

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  • Megan
    Just Said Yes July 2021
    Megan ·
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    First of all. YOU LOOK AMAZING!!! Now you should feel the best in your dress!! I too purchased a sale dress About a year ago and am totally second guessing myself now too. At the end of the day it’s about what YOU want. I don’t think it’s too revealing at all. Also for the record this is my 2nd wedding too. I think you look amazing . I’m a mom of 2 and finally lost my 2nd kids baby weight after 5 years . Whew. You rock that dress , or whatever dress you choose. You are gorgeous!! Smiley smile — I wish I could pull off a dress like that.
    • Reply
  • Kendra
    Devoted August 2020
    Kendra ·
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    Don't return it/sell it. It looks incredible on you and I think you'll look back and love it. You seriously look like you're glowing in it!!

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  • E
    Just Said Yes September 2020
    Elizabeth ·
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    I love it!!! It’s perfect!!!
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  • A
    Super February 2020
    Andrea ·
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    Please do not return this dress. It looks beautiful and you look super gorgeous in it. Don't listen to your sons, they don't understand. Age is just a number, and if you feel great and love the dress then keep it. Your FH will love you what you're wearing!

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  • Mary
    Savvy October 2020
    Mary ·
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    PERSONALLY, I FEEL THAT YOU MADE AN ABSOLUTELY, WONDERFUL PURCHASE THAT COMPLIMENTS YOU WELL. I SAY RELAX AND ENJOY YOUR DAY. RECOGNIZING YOUR KIDS RESPSONSES, ID SAY THEY ARE KIDS BEING KIDS AND ARE NOT THAT INTO IT AND UNDERSTANDING IF THAT MAKES SENSE AT ALL..MY KIDS ARE IN THEIR 20S AND THEY SAY HAVE SAID THINGS THAT I KNOW THEY TRULY DONT MEAN ANY HARM THEY JUST DINT KNOW HOW TO EXPRESS THEIR FEELINGS TO ME LIKE I WOULD LIKE THEM TO. FOR ME, IVE LEARNED WHAT TO ASK MY KIDS AND WHAT NOT TO ASK MY KIDS..LOL.. I DONT THINK THE DRESS IS TOO REVEALING. MY THIRD CHOICE HAPPENS TO BE ONE OF SUCH AND IM 47. IF YOU ARE COMFORTABLE INSIDE THE DRESS, I SAY KEEP IT AND WEAR IT WITH PRIDE.
    • Reply
  • Mary
    Savvy October 2020
    Mary ·
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    Audrey, I agree.
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