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Abbey
Beginner June 2020

Is my dress "right" for my situation?

Abbey, on January 5, 2020 at 8:14 AM

Posted in Wedding Attire 236

Hello everyone, A little background... I'm 37 years old, mother of two, and this is my second wedding. It's in 5 months and the ceremony will be in a garden outside a banquet hall. I was married too young the first time around and always felt my dress looked too frumpy/cute. This time around, I...

Hello everyone,

A little background... I'm 37 years old, mother of two, and this is my second wedding. It's in 5 months and the ceremony will be in a garden outside a banquet hall. I was married too young the first time around and always felt my dress looked too frumpy/cute. This time around, I feel like a "woman" and I'm less (but not by much) modest nowadays. I am not into fashion and having 15 years between weddings makes me feel out of touch. I'm literally the only female in my family (my fiance, two sons, my brother, his partner, my father, and three male cats), so I don't get girly often.

Dress shopping was emotionally charged as I lost my mother a year and a half ago to cancer. I was really missing her presence and I felt uneasy the whole experience. She was my best friend. She always said I needed A-line in everything (I'm pear shaped with a short torso). (Photos are pre-alteration).


I had two girlfriends with me who are so positive and way more up to date than I am on trends etc. When I put it on, my friends and the store stylist raved about how amazing it was. I felt confident and beautiful. I know my fiance would love the back especially Smiley winking I left feeling like I got a steal. I'm also on a budget. I bought this dress off the rack, and got 60% off. I have a friend that can do alterations affordably.


In true "me" fashion, I'm now second guessing the whole thing. My brain is fretting: Sale is final. It's too revealing. It's not right for my age. It's not what I had originally planned (modest, sleeves, mature). I have no business wearing something sexy. My mother wouldn't have approved. My back is exposed. Will I be able to dance? I've never worn anything form fitting before.... and on and on.


Now, my sons are more excited about the wedding and their roles in it than me sometimes. They have been so happy about me marrying their "bonus dad." Their dad and I had a strange, platonic, marriage and so they don't understand and aren't old enough to get that I want to be attractive for my new husband. I showed my ten year old and he said, "Mumma! Why do you want to be see through!!" and he looked uncomfortable. I asked my cute little jumping bean of a 7 year old, "do you like mommy's dress?" He smiled and said, "Nope!" and ran off to play some more. That's what has me the most worried.


I would love your honest opinions, because I'm clueless. I won't be hurt! But I'm pressed for time and I really need to be at ease. If that means shopping again, I should do it soon, and find a way to resell before it gets altered. Thanks!

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236 Comments

  • Dorothy
    Beginner July 2021
    Dorothy ·
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    WOW!!! Your future husband is going to be SPEECHLESS 😍😍😍 I get it, I'm 24 and without a kid and have the same thoughts. But you literally look so freaking amazing!!!


    But please, what are the details on this dress??? Cause I wanna see if a place around me has something similar 😳😍
    • Reply
  • Phylicia
    Dedicated November 2020
    Phylicia ·
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    The back of the dress is breathtaking!
    • Reply
  • Anna R
    Dedicated August 2020
    Anna R ·
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    OH MY GOD. You look absolutely stunning. My jaw dropped. The lace, the shape, the back detailing. Wow, it’s perfect. You better keep that and love it!!!!
    • Reply
  • Gaby
    Just Said Yes February 2020
    Gaby ·
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    You look BEAUTIFUL!!! Love it!
    • Reply
  • Lupita
    Just Said Yes April 2020
    Lupita ·
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    You wear this dress! It doesn’t wear you! You look amazing! Take it.
    • Reply
  • Kristina
    Savvy March 2022
    Kristina ·
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    STOP IT! You look absolutely stunning and I don't think it's inappropriate at all, you look absolutely gorgeous. If you feel great in this dress, then it's your dress. Your FH will be in awe for sure!

    • Reply
  • Molly
    Super October 2020
    Molly ·
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    I love this dress! You look amazing in it.
    • Reply
  • Hannah
    Beginner September 2020
    Hannah ·
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    Wow! This is gorgeous on you!!
    • Reply
  • Sarah
    Expert October 2021
    Sarah ·
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    First off you look younger then 37, you look like you are in your 20’s. The dress looks like it was made for you. Don’t second guess yourself. With your sons they are boys, and that seems to be how a lot of them are. Years ago after I got my prom dress and I asked my younger brothers what they thought, they said I did not look good and they asked why I was wearing a dress. Since I am more tomboyish, so I am not the type to wear dresses or skirts. So as you where saying you are kind of tomboyish as well, so if your sons have never seen you in a dress or it has been awhile that could be it. Don’t stress, you look amazing.
    • Reply
  • Hope
    Dedicated August 2020
    Hope ·
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    You look stunning. The dress is perfect!!
    ❤️💕❤️
    • Reply
  • Stevie
    Devoted February 2020
    Stevie ·
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    Omg this is GORGEOUS! You look so stunning Smiley heart

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  • MacDonald
    Just Said Yes June 2018
    MacDonald ·
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    This wedding dress suits you very well. It's very beautiful.

    • Reply
  • Andrea
    Super May 2020
    Andrea ·
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    You look absolutely amazing in that dress!!! Don’t dare return it! It’s completely perfect, you deserve to feel gorgeous and sexy everyday, but especially on your wedding day! Keep the dress, you won’t regret it 💗
    • Reply
  • V
    Just Said Yes October 2020
    Veronica ·
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    Girl, you are lovely in the dress and it's perfect for the occasion you described. It's all about feeling confident and beautiful, and that look on your face in the photo says you do. So wear it with pride & no second-guessing! ;-)

    • Reply
  • Katie
    Beginner September 2021
    Katie ·
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    I love it! Your age has nothing to do with the dress look, it fits you, you seem happy in it so go for it!
    • Reply
  • E
    Dedicated May 2021
    Elisa ·
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    100% honestly here: that dress is NOT too sexy and not too showy. You look beautiful and it compliments your figure so much. Also, my dear, you're still young!! You dont need to be wearing a nightgown to your wedding. Dont regret your choice, you did an awesome job picking the dress!

    • Reply
  • Beth
    Dedicated October 2020
    Beth ·
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    It’s perfect. I realize I don’t actually know you to say that, but I can tell even in the pictures it is perfect!! From another 30-something bride with a backless dress 😉
    • Reply
  • kittycow
    Expert December 2001
    kittycow ·
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    The train is AWESOME; it has so much visual interest!
    • Reply
  • Erin Buchanan
    Beginner October 2020
    Erin Buchanan ·
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    Omg. You look absolutely stunning. It is not too revealing. It's a very tasteful sexy but also beautiful. You look amazing. I'm so happy for you ❤
    • Reply
  • Alexa
    Just Said Yes July 2021
    Alexa ·
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    You’re beautiful and the dress is absolutely stunning!
    • Reply

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