Day 1 of Marriage and I hate it. Advise please.

And i believe it, my parents relationship is great, my family is embrasing him so nicely....but his family is cold is what i said. I do not want him to stop talking to them at all!! But I want them to respect what we have and stay out of the major decisions atleast

and I want him to put me before others as needy as that sounds.

Not buying it!

Doesn't sound like his family is cold, sounds like you have unrealistic expectations of people who don't know you. How can you say they are cold when you've only met them 4 months ago?? Maybe they are suspicious of you since you've been dating FOUR YEARS and engaged for one year and they're just now meeting you. Seriously...do yall live in different countries or something??....that might be an excuse...except Bright Eyes is from South Africa and her FS managed to meet her family....

All I know is that the more you say the fishier it sounds...

I apologize if this is a true story but it really is hard to believe. You can PM me with you other account if you'd like.

I met them 4 mo before the engagement. we were engaged for a year before we got married and now we are married for three weeks. and yes we do live in different countries.and i only came here after our wedding. the reason i cant work is because i need papers because am from another country.

The O-fficial MrsJoseph took the words right out of my mouth!

@Mrs. Jacques...love the pictures. I am cracking up!

Oh, I was SOOOOO right! Denise, you have mail.

Really, i dont think my being real or not is what I am here to defend. I only want constructive advise, am here to get some advise from people who are likely living in the same society just incase i didnt understand the ways of couple here and incase it is significantly different but still all good. If it is not constructive, i will not read it so dont bother posting asking for justifications whether am real or not. I may be unemployed but if nothing else, I can watch tv or something. Just loooking for a solution

Do yall speak the same language? I just can't see a well adjusted 31 year old woman sitting in an apartment going bat-shit crazy day after day, afraid to speak to her husband or MIL.

And if he goes to the gym everyday, why not just pack a bag and go with him? Yeah, I know you don't have a membership, but that can be done on-site. Where is your initiative? Why are you waiting for an invitation to join your own husband's life?

You hate asking for attention yet that's what this ENTIRE post has been about...

Analy - Ur to funny!

For all those that gave me the feedback i needed, thank you very much.

Shoe just talk to him. No matter if you cry, yell, or shout get all the words out. Try not to get to emotional when talking to him. Be up front and tell it like it his. Good luck with the talk!!!

OH dear glad I read through the entire post. At first I thought there was possibly something wrong with me as I wasn't totally getting this and thought there must be parts missing from this story and I now fully believe that there is if it is true. As someone who had a long distance relationship with my now husband before we eloped (2 months ago :-)) but are still going through with our ceremony as planned next year I have to say that he and I were able to get a true and honest view of each other and our respective families by ensuring that we spent time with each other and our respective families in our natural environment so we were able to get the good, bad and the ugly (thankfully there is no ugly) so its unclear how someone can have known their husband for as long as you are saying you do yet had no idea to the real him, and even if he was successful at hiding it you took a vow of marriage but seem rather quick to dismiss it without putting in any effort to get some help.

Hang in there Shoe S. Men need training, Talk to him, tell him what he is doing and how it makes you feel. If he loves you he will listen (even if he needs a thinking time after to truly appreciate what you said). If you dont tell him, he will never know how you feel and then you will just become more miserable! I married and immigrant and we went through a very tough time of adjustment, but now our marriage is rock solid!

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Read the Five Love Languages. It's a must for every couple.

Analy, you got mail!!

I wouldn't be so quick to jump to the troll conclusion, many, many brides in the past have created fake accounts to talk about things they can't under their real names, and I 99% of the time am able to figure out who they are. I have a very good thought to who this is, but am not certain because it isn't someone I normally interact with. And no, I'm not going to throw out names.

That's all I have to add because everything else has been said.

I was waiting on the troll call, and ladies you did not disappoint me. On the off chance that this is not made up... get yourself to counselling as number one priority. Number two priority should be for you to get yourself a job and a way to be more actively engaged with society. ( I know you said you have to wait a month but that will go quick).

Okay, I did my research and I know who this is. It is not a troll, she is a regular. I wish I had something constructive or helpful to say but I don't, I just hope you listen to some of this advice and find the help you need.