"By excluding our children, you have chosen to exclude us"...

My my my that was unbelievably rude. Sheesh. Talk about helicopter parenting and drama queen fits.

Ehhh, Heather, I see what you mean but why not just RSVP no and say you won't have childcare for that weekend? Why the ultimate f-d up guilt trip? THAT was unnecessary.

I feel like they just don't want to find someone to watch their kids. I highly doubt their kids are disappointed. I was never invited to weddings as a youngster, and my parents had more fun without me there! ha! good luck...

@ Ashley... I think we could all agree, my post was not to complain or suggest that she should come. I think the main faux pa here, is the way she handled things. A simple, "sorry we regretfully decline" would have been just fine. Would I have been shocked she wasn't coming, YES! I however would have never spoken or addressed her in disrespectful/passive aggressive way (hopefully you saw the whole letter, not just the first half, my reply, and all the OTHER details).

I'm not really sure why, If myself and my FH have a vision, that should be impaired for fear of hurting someone. It was not our intentions to offend/hurt, these were our wishes, and our vision from the day we got engaged. The only person I should be concerned about in this equation, is my FH-- as he and I are the ones who are hosting our wedding.

My future outlook on all unwanted opinions, moving forward will sound something like this: "I appreciate your opinion, it means a lot to us you care so much about our special day. When you get married/renew your vows, you should totally do that, it suits you."

In addition, my FH and I have welcomed all the children in our family to celebrate with us ahead of time. For example, my close friends daughters (who I consider nieces 3,5,and 6) are throwing me a tea party so we can celebrate before hand. So adorably FUN!

Excuse my French on the following post ok? DOES YOUR BROTHER HAVE A PAIR OF BALLS TO SHUT HIS WIFE UP? That was sooooooooo immature on her behalf. you being his sister should mean making a little fcking sacrifice. she needs to get off her high horse and take a seat. if it were your brother writing the letter, DIFF STORY, but who the fuck is she? shes just your sister in law. your brother will divorce her ass and youll have a diff sis in law. JUST SAYING. Im having an adult only reception as well. Whoever doesn't like it, stay the hell home w your kids. AMEN. END OF STORY. MY DAY MY WAY TYPE OF SITUATION.

@Raidiris love you!! My thoughts exactly!!

^uh can neither of you read? This isn't her brothers wife. This is her step sister.....which in a lot of families can be as close as a blood sister seeing as a lot of the time they grow up together.

@ Ashley -- While I respect your opinion, I disagree.

I will be quite Frank, after that letter, it's not that important that they attend, anymore

@ Heather-- We are close, as in we see one another one holidays. We didn't grow up in the same house.

@heather yes I get this is her step sister not her sister in law. Still funny to me

Jz, I totally understand that. But I was just saying that to the post above mine because they seem to think this is your sister in law who your brother is going to dump for being a bitch...which isn't the case.

@Heather. LOVE your profile picture!!! You love your babies, just as much as I LOVE mine

Also, Ashley, those non adults are "IN" the wedding. They serve a purpose.

@jz thank you! I love them and at some point decided getting professional pictures with them was the best idea.

You're getting push back about no kids, you should have heard some of the negatives I heard about my dogs being IN the wedding

Um, can you say passive aggressive? Seriously, grow up. She could have called you instead of writing the nasty note. I would say "you could actually bring them if you're willing to pay $100 a plate for their food and open bar? Oh, and I expect your gift to reflect 4 people invited to the wedding"

@Heather. I think it's absolutely wonderful that you are. It's your wedding, and if they are important to you, then they SHOULD be in the wedding!

Our little ones have a teeny tinkle problem (when they get excited). For that reason, they will be in our "get ready" pictures before I out on my nice white dress

@Heather - I agree with your original post. I was thinking that myself - if she had just replied no without any reason, wouldn't it have made you wonder why? Now, she was definitely nasty in the way she worded it, by all means.

Also, there are some family members who I wouldn't feel comfortable leaving my cat with, let alone my kids. Just because they're family doesn't make them the best caregivers for your kids. I work in child welfare - trust me on this one.

JZ - Your reply was very polite. :-)

Her note was completely out of line and unnecessary, but calling and cursing her out will only make things even worse and stress you out, hon. IT IS YOUR WEDDING, and what she did for hers is irrelevant.

Plus, it's not like they couldn't still travel with their children - they just are not invited to the ceremony and reception. A lot of people are doing that for our wedding - children and new boyfriends/girlfriends that we don't know are traveling with, and will hang out around the city and do the tourist thing while the invitees will be at the wedding (mine is a Sunday daytime wedding). My no-children policy applies to everyone under 21, so there are teenage cousins and god siblings who can spend time with the younger ones.

Ouch... What a bitchy letter.