"By excluding our children, you have chosen to exclude us"...

Your step-sister and husband are being super fucking rude. They totally don't have to come to the wedding if their kids are invited--it's their decision. But by writing such a nasty little note, they're being assholes.

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It's obvious to us that it is not important if Tony and I attend your wedding because I know this was a conscious decision that you made. You knew the consequence and you were willing to take it. It is irrelevant how many kids call you aunt Jackie. The fact is you only have one niece and one nephew. Family. I too had an adult only wedding, however you were invited at 12 years old (same as Joshua) because you were family."

Totally agree with Stephanie. She needs to get off her high horse. It's not HER wedding, it's yours! Don't let her get under your skin - she's making a big deal out of nothing! Its not like you're just excluding HER kids. As long as you and FH are on the same page, thats all that matters.

I would just write back and say you are sorry she feels that way and that you would have loved it if they can attend but understand that they won't be able to. The no child policy applies for everyone and if you make exceptions for them then you would need to make other exceptions and you are unable to do that due to (venue, space, budget..whatever) constraints.

That's pretty immature of them!!

This woman needs to get a clue!!

I think her note is a bit rude but I don't think she's in the wrong.

They're jerks. They're just trying to guilt you into making an exception. It's your wedding and you call the shots on who goes. Just send a polite reply back...along the lines of "Unfortunately we have made the decision to have an adults-only wedding and won't be making any exceptions. We are sorry that you won't be able to make it."

Haha. My cousin, who was a BM did exactly the same thing. Only she included her dad and mom as well So that entire branch of the family isn't coming because I didn't want kids under 5 at the wedding.

What a cow. I don't care who she is, you decided to have NO children at the wedding, regardless of whether or not they were family!

She could've just sent back her "No" reply and left it at that!

Why do some people think they're the exception? Like you said, it's black and white. If they choose not to come it's their loss.

That's horrendously rude.

They could have just checked "no, thank you" and kept rolling.

I think if that was my step-sister I would be throwing punches.

@FutureMrsDelpra Yes, she is in the wrong. This isn't her wedding. Just because you have children doesn't give them the right to be invited everywhere adults go.

Sounds like she needs a time out.

Also her saying she had an adult wedding but you were invited... I'm sorry but step sister is different than niece and nephew, a lot different!

Wow. Just wow.

I keep trying to come up with clever or nicely worded responses to this, but wow is she just being a selfish, manipulative bitch.

I would be on the phone cussing her out so quick it would make her head spin...OH HELL NO!

Wow!! I wouldn't even entertain her with a response. It's YOUR wedding and you stated how you would like things to go. She doesn't agree....ok. Tell her "BYE FELICIA" if anything at all.

I am surprised that she didn't know about this… I mean I understand the "no child" rule but I also soommmeeewhhhaaaatt understand that your step-sister might have been taken aback, when she received the invitation without a warning about your rule. Do I think she had to write this nasty note? No, and I am not sure I would even respond though I like the response someone wrote in here.

Sounds like you dodged a bullet by "choosing" to exclude her. Pretty sure she could find someone to watch her children. .... Dear Sis! Since I don't want my lovely niece and nephew to be bored at an adults only reception where alcohol is being served, I thought you would agree...oh well!

Sorry I'm siding with her. Obviously if they're flying from out of town you would know they couldn't come without their kids? They can't just leave their children in a different city... I mean the note was pretty rude and I would have just politely declined but this is really touchy for a lot of people and you should expect to piss some people off when you exclude children from your wedding. That said, I've already had someone give me a snarky comment about how they'd better not be sitting at a table with children during our reception. You just cannot please everyone.