couple dreams

We all have dreams, whether we remember them or not. In fact, the average individual dreams for around two hours each night while they’re asleep, according to the National Institute of Neurological Disorders and Stroke. There’s no denying that dreams can be strange, and sometimes they don’t really make much sense, but whether we’re aware of it or not, most of the times, our dreams mimic our reality in some way, shape or form. Whatever is going on in your life, it’s likely to end up in your dreams at some point. And this is especially the case for major life-changing events, such as your wedding. And so you may be wondering what all of these dreams about your wedding actually mean.

“When wedding planning consumes our day, it will also consume our dreams at night,” says Lauri Quinn Loewenberg, professional dream analyst and author of Dream on It, Unlock Your Dreams, Change Your Life. She analyzes the dreams of so many frustrated brides that she even has a nickname for them: Bridemares. “The wedding day is the most important day in a young person’s life, and many times he or she has fantasized about it growing up,” Quinn explains. “The stress that placed on brides and grooms for everything to be just right adds a lot of unnecessary anxiety to their psyche resulting in these upsetting dreams.”

So what do dreams about weddings actually mean? We asked Quinn to reveal some of the more common wedding dreams she’s heard about—and what they might mean for the dreamer.

No one shows up to the wedding.

This is one of the most common dreams for any member of the wedding party to have—and there’s no denying that it’s a scary one! Hours and hours of creating (and editing) a guest list can leave you a frantic and worried mess—are you inviting too many people? What if they all come? What if none of them come? If you dream about the latter, it’s typically the result of your underlying fear that potential bad blood among certain friends or family might keep them from coming to your big day, explains Quinn. She points out that this dream can also be caused by the bride, groom, or even one of their parents worrying that other people (i.e. those invited) may not feel that the day is as important, and neglect to make an appearance. 

There’s something wrong with the dress or suit.

Wedding attire, especially for the bride or groom, is one of the most important, not to mention expensive, clothing purchases one can make, so it’s no surprise that it’s on one’s mind quite figuratively day and night. Quinn explains that this dream tends to happen when a bride or groom hasn’t found the perfect outfit for their big day or when alterations are taking too long. 

Running late to your own wedding.

Quinn has found that this dream to be most common among the couples who feel they are a bit late (in terms of age) when it comes to tying the knot or, perhaps even individuals who worried that their day may never come in the first place. “This dream is also so prevalent simply because of the deadlines involved in wedding planning,” she says. “Whenever there is a deadline in waking life we will often dream of running late in some form or fashion.”

Marrying someone other than your partner.

So what does this wedding dream actually mean? It might sound strange, but there’s a good reason for a bride or groom to have this dream—and it doesn’t always mean he or she is marrying the wrong person. “A lot of the meaning of this dream depends on who is standing in place of the bride or groom because they will symbolize some quality or fault he or she is preparing to be committed to,” says Quinn. “For example, a common one is that the bride or groom in the dream turns out to be his or her lover’s best friend.” This, she explains, is a very good indication that the bride or groom is reassuring themselves that their relationship is based on a strong friendship. In other words, the best friend symbolizes the friendship between the married couple-to-be.

The bride or groom can't find the wedding venue.

Obviously you know where your wedding venue is—you picked it out after all! But if you’ve dreamt about not knowing where you are when it’s time to say “I do,” it usually means that there is still indecision involved somewhere in the wedding plan, notes Quinn. “When faced with tough decisions, we tend to say, ‘which way should I go’ with this?” Don’t take it to heart—just consider it a reminder to tie up any loose ends in advance of your big day.