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Engagement Etiquette Tips

Engagement etiquette tips you need to know.

Engagement photo of couple outside

Engagement photo of couple outside

Photo: Will Pursell Photo

Check out these engagement etiquette tips to ensure that this exciting time goes as smoothly as possible!

Who should I tell about our engagement first?
It’s proper etiquette to tell your immediate families first, followed by close friends or other family members. Once all of your VIPs have heard the big news directly from you, then you’re free to announce your engagement on social media.

I hate my ring. Should I tell my fiancé(e)?
Depends on what you hate about the ring. If you think the stone is too small or your fiancé didn’t spend enough money, that’s something you should keep to yourself – you can always upgrade in a few years. However, if you’re not a fan of the style of the ring, you can tell your fiancé – just wait until a few weeks have passed after the proposal. In a calm manner, express that you’re so grateful for the ring that he purchased but since it’s something you’re going to wear every day for the rest of your life, you want to make sure it’s totally your style. Volunteer to do all the legwork – go to the jeweler, etc. Hopefully, he’ll appreciate your honesty.

Everyone’s asking me “When’s the wedding?” and we literally got engaged a week ago! How do I politely tell them to back off?
Smile warmly, and simply say: “When we have a date, you’ll be the first to know.” Don’t let their questions stress you out – enjoy this blissful time and start planning when you and your fiancé(e) are ready.

Our parents haven’t met yet. How do we introduce them?
Introducing your parents can be a stressful situation, but with the right preparation it doesn’t have to be. Pick a quiet restaurant rather than one of their homes, if possible – try to stick to “neutral territory.” Make sure that both sets of parents are provided with some basic information about one another – jobs, other children, hobbies, etc. so that they’re prepared for the meeting. And when the meeting does occur, make sure that you and your fiancé are prepared to fill any awkward silences.

Do we have to have an engagement party?
You don’t, but it’s possible that family members or friends will want to throw you one anyway. Typically the bride’s parents are the ones who host the engagement party, but really any family members or friends can host the celebration. Just remember that anyone who is invited to the engagement party will be expecting an invitation to the wedding, too!