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Tiffany
Devoted November 2016

Who's paying for their own wedding?

Tiffany, on September 6, 2016 at 8:19 PM

Posted in Planning 352

I think just to show a few ladies who think it's their parents responsibility to pay exactly how many of us are paying, everyone who is paying for their own wedding should comment here. ETA: Because I forgot that people on the internet take offense to things that are not about them. This site is a...

I think just to show a few ladies who think it's their parents responsibility to pay exactly how many of us are paying, everyone who is paying for their own wedding should comment here.

ETA: Because I forgot that people on the internet take offense to things that are not about them. This site is a guilty pleasure of mine. Yesterday I had the most stressful wedding planning day to date. I get online and the first post I read is titled "who pays". While reading through the comments, I come across a girl who is upset that her father refuses to pay even though he is financially able. She sounded like an entitled brat. She then commented that she really doubted the majority of us were paying on our own. This "rubbed me the wrong way" I started this post to prove a point that the majority of us are in fact paying on our own. I am in no way trying to shame those fortunate enough to have family help. Nor do I think I am better because I don't.

352 Comments

  • Ghostly Smile
    Devoted December 2017
    Ghostly Smile ·
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    We are. And for FMIL's flight down.

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  • SteelersBride
    Expert October 2017
    SteelersBride ·
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    We're paying for ours outselves! Although like many PP's, my mom wanted to get my dress. So that she did.

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  • Jacinta
    Super August 2017
    Jacinta ·
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    We are!!

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  • 5starFM
    VIP January 2017
    5starFM ·
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    FH and I are paying for everything. Mom gifted me $1,000. That went towards deposit for our all inclusive venue. We have a 15k total budget.

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  • FutureMrs.Grant
    Super September 2017
    FutureMrs.Grant ·
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    We're paying for the majority of the wedding. Both sides of our parent's are contributing

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  • Megan P.
    Dedicated November 2017
    Megan P. ·
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    @VC It's so nice to run in to other same sex couples on here! So hey! But yeah, I understand. I think my mom will come. And my step dad was more of a father to me than my biological dad was so I really hope he comes because I would love to have a father to dance with and walk me down the aisle. My biological dad probably won't come and I know my step mom and step siblings won't come. None of my grandparents will probably show up and my fiancées parents are extremely religious so if they show up my jaw will probably drop lol

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  • nolalishak
    Master June 2017
    nolalishak ·
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    Yerp

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  • ThatsMRSSpraguetoyou
    Dedicated March 2017
    ThatsMRSSpraguetoyou ·
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    This is my 2nd wedding, but my fiancé a 1st. I wouldn't dare ask my parents for a dime because they sacrificed and paid $15,000 for my 1st wedding. We have been blessed. My fiancée grandmother offers to pay half of our venue, my Dad offered to pay the other half. My Mom offered to buy my dress and my fiancée other grandmother is taking care of the food. Oh, and my friends mom who used to own a bakery offered to do the cake. So we will be taking care of the photographer, DJ, and decorations. I'm grateful because I thought we would have to pay for everything!

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  • VC
    Master May 2017
    VC ·
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    @Megan - The bright side is you have the right mind sent and that you know your day will be filled with love and happiness from those who truly support and love you. To be honest, I get more emotional thinking that those who are there are truly the ones who want to be there.

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  • Nicole
    Dedicated March 2017
    Nicole ·
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    My 1st marriage both sides including my ex and I contributed. My mother paid for the whole reception. This time around I learned, and what I learned is the less hands in the pot the better! So my FH and I are coming all out of pocket for our wedding and it feels good doing so. If you can you can if not than not. Live and learn, teach their own, everyone is different! Good luck!

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  • Lillian
    Expert April 2017
    Lillian ·
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    We are!

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  • Nicole
    Dedicated March 2017
    Nicole ·
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    My 1st marriage both sides including my ex and I contributed. My mother paid for the whole reception. This time around I learned, and what I learned is the less hands in the pot the better! So my FH and I are coming all out of pocket for our wedding and it feels good doing so. If you can you can if not than not. Live and learn, teach their own, everyone is different! Good luck!

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  • MrsMamaP
    Expert July 2016
    MrsMamaP ·
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    We paid for ours ourselves, so DH's family covered the rehearsal dinner for us and my parents gifted us a honeymoon on our wedding night for a job well done Smiley smile

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  • koolaid303
    Devoted October 2016
    koolaid303 ·
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    We are and man has it been stressful!!! Alot of overtime, no eating out or splurging on anything but my wedding is going to be awesome even if I'm broke now it's totally worth it and we will have no debt!!!!


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  • A Bride
    Super August 2016
    A Bride ·
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    We paid for our own wedding and are waiting until next year to go on our delayed honeymoon because we’re paying for that too. Could we afford a big wedding? No, so we didn’t have a big wedding. We had a very small wedding which was what we could afford. Some of DH’s shittier family members are still super salty that they weren’t invited (we cut extended family across the board) and his mom was so upset that we wouldn’t have a family reunion, but did she offer to pay for those extra 80 family members? Nope, so we didn’t have to listen to a word she said. No pay, no say! It was amazing not having anyone else influence decisions that were important to us on our one day.

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  • Colleen
    VIP June 2016
    Colleen ·
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    Paid my own, 100%.

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  • Megan P.
    Dedicated November 2017
    Megan P. ·
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    @VC Exactly! Growing up I always knew I was different and I live in a very small town in Michigan so I never really knew that gay was a "thing" and I was always so scared no one would come to my wedding. Anyone that shows up is gonna make our day so much more special to me because I kind of feel like I'll always feel like I'm doing something wrong because I'm gay, but that's just the way I was brought up in my very close minded town.

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  • Jocelyn
    Devoted September 2016
    Jocelyn ·
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    We are!

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  • Katelina1
    VIP June 2017
    Katelina1 ·
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    We were planning on paying for our entire wedding. My parents then told us they would pay for a certain amount. We never asked though!!! And we are paying for the rest, and our own honeymoon.

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  • K
    Savvy September 2016
    Kaylyn ·
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    We are. I've taken care of most of it, stressful!!! Did get some offered help towards the end (I think my family seen my stress level lol) so that's nice. But we've managed on our own, hard parts are getting help figuring things out and making stuff.. planning and gathering... rough lol

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