PSA: PLEASE don't have your marriage performed by a friend ordained online!

Here is a New York Times article on the subject. This is just not something you want to fool around with!

Great topic, 2d Bride! I hope the WW community takes the time to read and consider this.

Great post!

You really really really need to do your research if you're using someone ordained online.

I did it a few years ago for a friends wedding, and I had to go to the court house in the county they were getting married in to fill out paperwork, take an oath, and file a copy of my notarized docs.

Just getting ordained isn't enough- you have to pay to get the notarized paperwork and then check the counties laws to make sure the wedding is 100% legal.

Yeah no kidding. I know that's a site that seems to get mentioned a lot around here. It's also a one of the most common officiants in the state of California, but at least it's recognized out here.

Thats hilarious. My brother got ordained online and my mom suggested he do our wedding. I told her that was a BIG no. Glad your pointing in out to people!

Great reminded! With many states, the officiant has to be registered with the county they are performing marriages in! If you get a friend ordained online, they don't know these things! Same with newer pastors, or even your own pastor officiating at a venue in a different county!

Please, make sure your officiant knows the local laws and is legal!

I'm sure this will help a lot of Brides, great PSA, I've heard so much about people just having their friends do this online in order to marry them, never quite understood it... the thought never even cross our minds to even hire someone, we're using our pastors to officiate, thank God

Wow I had no idea!!! I wanted my great uncle to do it since he has been doing wedding for years and then my grandma told me that he had retired from the wedding business so I got super bummed and FH and I thought of getting someone ordained online but luckily all my grandma had to do was bring up the fact that it meant a lot to me to have him do it and he said he would gladly come out of retirement for me

THANK YOU for posting this!!! Hopefully it'll help someone make a better decision!

Yeah great post

The thing is besides online its easy for someone to be legally marry you for the day My dad was going to do ours when we our officiant canceled. WE looked into it and its really easy for some one to become a JOP for the day (theres a different term cant think of it) At least if you go though the court system seems a bit safer than on line

Crap... now I'm not 100% positive my wedding will be legal! We're getting married by a man who was a priest. He left the priesthood so he could get married. He says that since he had already taken his vows, he can still preform ceremonies, but they're just not recognized by the church. Guess I have some phone calls to make today....

Good advice. You need to make sure that whoever officiates your ceremony is recognized by the state (or country) where you get married, too. You can get ordained quickly and easily online, but that doesn't mean the jurisdiction in which you will get married recognizes this. The state/country may have its own separate requirements.

I believe most states have a list of officiants they recognize, and instructions re: whether and how your officiant can get on that list.

@Lizzie: Actually, that varies from state to state. In Massachusetts, for example, it is very easy. In Virginia, you can only do that if the person is a resident of Virginia. And some states don't have a provision for a JOP for the day at all.

Thank you 2d!!!!!

Edited to wonder how my thank you ended up above the note to me? Things that make you go hmmmm.....

@Jessica: You should be fine, assuming you are getting married in New York. There are a few states that require that your officiant have a current congregation, but New York is not one of them. And since your officiant was validly ordained, it shouldn't be an issue.

Good post 2d..we may do a JOP a few months before the wedding..really not sure though..how can after the fact someone check to see if their marriage is in fact legal? I'm sure mine would be fine..but do you just see certain paperwork from the officiant? I'm starting to get paranoid lol!

Yep, there is difference between licensed and ordained. They have to be licensed.

@Ab Z.: Well, the JOP would definitely be fine. However, there is no way to really be sure a ceremony with someone ordained online is legal unless there is already a statute or court case on the subject.

There is no way I would get married by someone who was "ordained" online. Absolutely not. Never crossed my mind to do so. Thanks for posting this...I'm sure someone needed to read this! Interesting info. too!

Just looked at the article 2d Bride posted. The 2 people they described who were "duped" and weren't actually married were both lawyers. You'd think they'd have known to check and be sure! LOL.