Mastectomy or wedding

I am sorry you are going through this. I also advise getting a second opinion ASAP. If the second doctor agrees, put the wedding on hold or marry at the courthouse and have the recommended surgeries. After having the surgeries, throw yourself one hell of a celebration!

I will keep you in my prayers.

I am so sorry to hear you are going through this. I havent gotten the test done yet because I'm just too terrified. I need to do it though. You can bet your ass if I get the same results as you, those body parts are getting removed.

I would have the surgery as soon as insurance can cover it. If my mother hadnt had the amazing insurance she did, we would be bankrupt. Wait and schedule the surgery until you are back from your honeymoon since you'll probably need to wait anyway.

I saw my mother waste away from this disease for 5 years, with everything that could go wrong, go wrong. One of the things she told me before she died is that she wished she had more radical surgery instead of the simple lumpectomy. She joked she would have been able to have awesome boobs on the insurance's dime.

what about children? have you discussed it with FH? will you be freezing eggs in hopes of a surogate or will you be looking into adoption so that the genes will not be passed on to a daughter?

We have are kids and we have three girls makes it more scary because I know the dangers, and I have seen a genetic speacialist and he said get the surgeries these mutations are not the same as getting breast cancer its a more aggressive form so if I actually get the cancer me dying would be a very high possability. Family history plays a big part in all of this thats why I got the testing to begin with my doctor feared I was at risk. My mother died in her 30's so this is the best way to keep me alive.

And @ Blair H please get it done if the family history is there you need to be tested because once you have the actual cancer it's hard to beat it.

The decision has to e a difficult one to make and I am sorry you are even faced with having to make it. Push the wedding up, have a nice small something and then have the surgeries as soon as you are able to schedule them. Then for your 1st or 5 year anniversary, have the big shindig vowel renewal. But just reading some of the informed posts I'd say seek out th ebest professional opinions (specialist who deal with this gene mutation) and proceed accordingly. It's like playing russian roulette it sounds like if you don't.

Insurance won't cover the surgeries until youre 25? can you get them to allow you to do it now?

Talk to your insurance company raise hell tell them it is not elective it is by doctors orders. They put that age barrier to protect them selves but they can make exceptions. If you have gotten a second opinion and this is something you need to take care of to continue living than do it. Everyone will understand if you have to postpone it and if they don't too bad what is the point of a beautiful wedding if you may not be arround to remmember it?

I was just about to say what Rachel said.

Wow, im sorry

get married now! be happy and enjoy life in all that it has to offer, have the surgery's later when you have ins ,you could get cancer in 2 months or never at all

plan for having the surgery after the wedding, if you have to before then you cross that road then

and please get a second opinion

I say get married and have your doc keep an eye on you then have surgery once you turn 25

About your girls- if it makes you feel any better they have a chance of not having it. my aunt had it and had a double mastectomy, then my cousin got tested and she did not have the gene mutation

I'm with Kris on this one, why not have a small wedding and then after the surgery and recovery (maybe an anniversary type thing) have a big reception bash? Gives you an excuse to wear two beautiful dresses

Okay ladies I gotta just say read all the post before saying get a second opinion she has stated she already has and as some one else said in this case saying wait & see what happens is kind of like saying sure go play on the highway you might not get hit by a car this isn't a simple case.

I fully understand what at stake

im speaking from my own experiences, my BFF was diagnosed with stage 3 inflammatory breast cancer at the age of 24, she too tested positive for the gene's (found out after the fact)

she too was planning a wedding when diagnosed, she has it done before, as she had cancer, the scars she has are not nice and limited what she could and felt comfortable wearing

im saying get married now even bump the wedding up that way she has the wedding of her dreams before going through hell

i also have had a hysterectomy and know the emotional recovery is a long one

Denise- it sounds like you know what you need to do. Also Casey seems pretty familiar with what you are going through and gave some good advice/support. I personally would go to the JOP and get married because you never know what may happen and if marriage is as important to you as it is to me. Then that's what I would do first , then I would plan on my surgeries. Go ahead and plan the big wedding still and push it further if needed. Good luck with everything, and keep us updated. I'm here if you wanna talk : )

I'm so sorry you are faced with this decision. I'm a cancer researcher at the cancer institute of NJ and work with some of the top breast cancer oncologists. I've heard plenty of talks from professionals about familial breast cancer.. all of the mutations in the DNA repair pathway that lead to it and all of the statistics. If it were me, I would definitely get the surgery. Wedding planning can be very stressful on its own. I can't imagine how incredibly stressful it will be for you if you are constantly worrying about how soon your cancer could develop. I would either try to plan the wedding sooner or just postpone it.

If you're concerned about the money, dont be. American Cancer Society and Susan G. Komen can assist with bills. In addition, every hospital has a financial aid officer that can assist in getting you the grants that you qualify for. Get the grants first, then let the other nonprofits know your situation. And, just a heads up, this is a situation that my best friend was in, although she did have breast cancer. I contacted Susan G Koman and they sent me a gift card to help her purchase her wedding dress. There are so many options, so I'm assuming you have deposits and stuff down already, don't throw that money away. Make sure you take all these ladies advice and get a second opinion though, it is common for drs to go overboard in prevention, from what I understand.

First I'm sorry your having to go through this and sorry for the loss of your mom and grandmother You mentioned your girls, what would you want them to do in your situation? Personally I would probably have a wedding sooner rather then later and have the surgeries as soon as your insurance allows you too. It sounds like the surgeries are in your best interest. I'm not a nurse or anything but Im just thinking if having the surgeries allows you to feel free from the worries then it would be worth it. It might also help ensure you will be there for your children if they have to eventually make the same choice. Goodluck and if you ever need anything you have lots of people here willing to listen and give support

I took some of the advice I recieved today and called my insurance again and I can have my surgery ASAP!!!!!! My doctor just has to send in the test results and we can begin the process my insurance said if the request is marked as urgent ( which mines qualifies for) it will take two days to have my surgery approved. I also talked to my doctor and I do qualify for the nipple sparing mastectomy which means I DO NOT HAVE TO REMOVE MY BREAST JUST THE TISSUES then get the implants. After healing I will then get the hysterctomy thank you all for your support and well wishes and the kick I needed to stop feeling sorry for myself and call my insurance instead of leaving everything up to my doctors! A little push with the insurance went along way once again thank you all!!!!

Thank you