Is a cash bar okay for wedding?

@Holly, I thought there was going to be a cash bar at the last wedding I went to. I had my flask in my purse. Several other guests had theirs. It's not an urban myth. I also hadn't sealed the envelope on my card of cash.

We went to a cash bar wedding and a couple of the guys at the table actually brought beer and wine in gift bags and kept them under the table all night.

Kind of ingenious.

OMG. I came here for the comments.

OP, we are just doing beer and wine. It is all we can afford and is considered typical in our are. Most people don't expect top shelf open bars.

@Ryan, Emily Post is updated very frequently. The wedding etiquette book, in its 6th Edition, was published in the last 5-7 years. It even includes wedding website and same sex couple etiquette (i.e. how to address invites, and tips for same sex weddings)! It's all very modern. And written by her great granddaughters.

Oh boy... Be prepared to be ripped to shreds on here

Scrolling

Hi Melissa! I'm glad the discussion here helped you make your decision, I think you've reached a great compromise. You may want to update your original post so that other members who find your thread and skip some of the middle pages know you've made your decision.

To all those saying you don't HAVE to have alcohol...you're right. You don't HAVE to have food, water, forks and knives, tables, or even chairs. And I don't think anyone on WW even says you HAVE to have any of that. We're just letting you know that if you are missing any of those things, then your guests, yes even your nearest and dearest friends and family, will talk shit about you behind your back for years. That's all... So if that doesn't bother you then by-all-means do whatever the hell you want to do, but stop asking us about it.

Search it!!

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@Ryan: You prove my point. Had you bothered to trim your guest list to something you could afford, you could properly host your guests, still have an amazing wedding, and have alcohol like good hosts. Instead, you overextended your invitation list and now are struggling to excuse your cheap choices because of your prior poor choices and planning. THAT is the problem, not the cost of alcohol itself. Had you cut the guest list in half, or even 2/3, you could have easily hosted alcohol, possibly even a full open top shelf bar. Instead, you invited an extra 30-50 gifts.

This is what's wrong with the mindset.

And to whoever apparently said nobody here knows what it's like to be poor, try living with an infant for a month in a house with the water cut off. It gets pretty difficult pretty quickly when you have to go to friends' houses just to bathe or fill up jugs to flush the toilet or use for washing dishes and cooking. I KNOW what being below poverty poor is. I don't have to live that way anymore because I WORKED my ass off.

At least supply beer and wine of some sort even if just for 2hrs. If people want hard liquor it's okay IMO to pay for it themselves. But you have to give them something! (There was even a keg at a friend's Mormon wedding. It was in a truck in the parking lot. But everyone knew they had to provide some sort of booze!)

We are doing beer,wine and signature cocktails. I think you should try doing something along those lines.

A friend was telling me the other day that I was making a mistake not having a cash bar. He said because it's free beer, some people will open one bottle, not finish it and go get another, and probably forget where they left the second bottle and go get a third...blah blah blah!

Trust me, I couldn't be moved! NO NO NO NO NO TO CASH BARS!

My fiancé and I even called our friends to find out what type of beer/ wine they would like to drink and we are going to get the most liked or talked about liquor that is affordable and fits into our budget.

OUR GUESTS WILL EAT AND DRINK FOR FREE!!!

CAN THESE QUESTIONS ABOUT CASH BARS AND HONEYMOON FUNDS AND SO ON STOP PLEASE!!n

Why does this keep happening ...?

Allysha boo no you're wrong

@Allysha - Please read the entire thing. Also, OP has decided to actually host her guests properly, unlike you.

Can I get a "School of Rock" meme up in here for all the "A" names that have bad ideas.

@Allysha - I guess you missed my post that was just 7 posts above yours:

"To all those saying you don't HAVE to have alcohol...you're right. You don't HAVE to have food, water, forks and knives, tables, or even chairs. And I don't think anyone on WW even says you HAVE to have any of that. We're just letting you know that if you are missing any of those things, then your guests, yes even your nearest and dearest friends and family, will talk shit about you behind your back for years. That's all... So if that doesn't bother you then by-all-means do whatever the hell you want to do, but stop asking us about it."

WOW I cant believe that people expect to NOT have to pay for drinks they consume. My son had his wedding in June and yes it was a cash bar. We served beer and wine during the cocktail hour but after that it was all on the guest. Not once did I hear anyone say it was rude in fact I was told by many it was the best wedding they have attended in a long time. So for me and paying 20k plus for my daughters wedding I will not be footing the bill for guest to drink and 1/2 this wedding will be from out of town. But hey if people feel the need to waste more money on alcohol your choice I would rather have more family and friends attend the wedding than worrying about wetting someones whistle..

I'm confused by how people come in after 10 pages and tell OP to "prepare" for certain responses. Like honey, you missed that train.

I just rolled my eyes so hard I checked out my own ass.