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Deborah
Dedicated September 2017

Groom's Family Hates Me

Deborah, on June 9, 2015 at 9:06 AM

Posted in Etiquette and Advice 272

So my FH's family hates me. They refuse to be in the same room with me and he's not allowed to even talk about me. Why? Because we dated six years ago and I was very sick and couldn't work which made my FH stressed and we broke up then. We got back together three years later under the condition that...

So my FH's family hates me. They refuse to be in the same room with me and he's not allowed to even talk about me. Why? Because we dated six years ago and I was very sick and couldn't work which made my FH stressed and we broke up then. We got back together three years later under the condition that even if I'm sick I need to work somehow. I have fibromyalgia, chronic migraines and back problems. I work online now and work part-time. This isn't good enough for them and about nine months ago sent me letters telling me to break up with my FH because they don't think I love him. He is very soft spoken but did take a stand for me on that issue.

Well, he wants his family at the wedding - can't blame him. I am worried that they won't show and how that might feel for him. If they do come, he wants his sister, brother-in-law (who sent the letter) and brother to be his groomsmen. I would prefer they aren't but he has a right to have them.

What can I do to make this easier?

272 Comments

  • Lauren B.
    Master October 2015
    Lauren B. ·
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    She basically forgave everyone except you Emmy lol

    • Reply
  • OG Mrs.K (2.0)
    Master September 2014
    OG Mrs.K (2.0) ·
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    .


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  • LB
    Master May 2014
    LB ·
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    Why was @Emmy singled out? WTF.

    #TeamEmmy

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  • OriginalKD
    Master December 2015
    OriginalKD ·
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    Oh and don't forget about how deep Emmy's comments hurt her. Really, really hurt bad and something about how it will take a long time to get over it or some other passive aggresive bs.

    #TeamEmmy

    #teamshoepeen

    ETA: Jumping on board #TeamEmmy

    • Reply
  • KM
    Master March 2015
    KM ·
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    This is why posting a real confession in confession Friday is dangerous. Someone always brings something up.

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  • OG Mrs.K (2.0)
    Master September 2014
    OG Mrs.K (2.0) ·
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    Good job Emmy...now she's gonna go slit her wrists or some shit and blame it on you. I feel like flagging her profile so maybe she'll get banned and then be forced to spend her time in counseling instead of on WW.

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  • Emmy
    Master January 2015
    Emmy ·
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    Rats! Because I also pin my selfworth on things people on the interweb think of me.

    ETA: Bat meme


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  • LB
    Master May 2014
    LB ·
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    For those wondering about shoe peen, it was the user named Rebekah who introduced it.

    • Reply
  • OG Mrs.K (2.0)
    Master September 2014
    OG Mrs.K (2.0) ·
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    @Lively - don't lie. You know I Google penis pics on my spare time...LOL!

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  • OriginalRandi
    Master November 2015
    OriginalRandi ·
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    Un. Believable. Went to a work meeting, came back to World War III. (And also missed everything that got flagged/hidden, so I am UTTERLY confused.)

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  • LB
    Master May 2014
    LB ·
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    I'm astounded (ok, HAPPY!) that the flaggers haven't gotten to this yet! And we had shoe peen!

    #DownfallOfSociety LOL

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  • Emmy
    Master January 2015
    Emmy ·
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    Seriously @O&S...agree

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  • X
    Expert August 2015
    xxxxxx ·
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    I'm truly sorry about bringing up the confession post thing. I didn't know it wasn't allowed. I didn't mean any harm with that.

    I stand by what I said about Emmy's hurtful comments. My "mommy issues" are that I wish I could have spent more time with her growing up, because she's an amazing person. Laugh all you want. It hurt very bad.

    And my FH has it pretty good. I take pretty good care of him.

    And I "forgave" Emmy, too.

    I'll gladly take my "creepy eyes" and go. I'm sincerely sorry that I offended so many people. It wasn't my intention at all. Not even a little. I'm actually a very caring, soft spoken, loving person in real life. I'm sure many of you are. But, ya know, internet. It's easy to say things on here that you wouldn't say to someone in real life.

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  • LB
    Master May 2014
    LB ·
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    What was the confession?

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  • Promike
    Master September 2015
    Promike ·
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    Double

    • Reply
  • Promike
    Master September 2015
    Promike ·
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    She commented on a Confession from Friday but I have NEVER seen her even participate in Confession Friday....wow! I am so nosey and mad that I didn't see the comment though.

    • Reply
  • StarFromIHJ
    Master August 2016
    StarFromIHJ ·
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    Wow, talk about a hijacked thread.

    @NotHappening, I stand by my previous comments to you in other threads. You need counseling. If the internet upsets you this much, get away from the PC and clear your head.

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  • Deborah
    Dedicated September 2017
    Deborah ·
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    These people are pretty bad. I'm telling you both sides of the story. He even is extremely upset with them. I am sorry if this doesn't seem like it's likely to happen but it is. I think partly it's because of the cultural background. I don't come from a lot of money and I'm not Asian like his family. There are members of his extended family who won't talk to his parents because of their own problems primarily with his mother.

    We struggled financially. He has a hard time taking care of himself. And with my health issues I think they are worried about me causing him more problems and will do whatever it takes for me to not be a part of his life. He's very receptive to their opinion so they are hoping this will work.

    I am not against him having me work nor am I against working. I am writing this from work now. I understand where he's coming from in wanting me to work. I could likely qualify for disability but it takes two years to get and you aren't supposed to work in those two years. We can't afford for me to do that.

    • Reply
  • Deborah
    Dedicated September 2017
    Deborah ·
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    These people are pretty bad. I'm telling you both sides of the story. He even is extremely upset with them. I am sorry if this doesn't seem like it's likely to happen but it is. I think partly it's because of the cultural background. I don't come from a lot of money and I'm not Asian like his family. There are members of his extended family who won't talk to his parents because of their own problems primarily with his mother.

    We struggled financially. He has a hard time taking care of himself. And with my health issues I think they are worried about me causing him more problems and will do whatever it takes for me to not be a part of his life. He's very receptive to their opinion so they are hoping this will work.

    I am not against him having me work nor am I against working. I am writing this from work now. I understand where he's coming from in wanting me to work. I could likely qualify for disability but it takes two years to get and you aren't supposed to work in those two years. We can't afford for me to do that.

    • Reply
  • OriginalRandi
    Master November 2015
    OriginalRandi ·
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    Yeah...is there a legal way we can be informed of the CF that was brought up, or is that a no go? UPDATE - I'm joking about a "legal" way. See comment belowSmiley smile

    ETA ...and then on page 12 OP came back. Today is the weirdest.

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