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Deborah
Dedicated September 2017

Groom's Family Hates Me

Deborah, on June 9, 2015 at 9:06 AM

Posted in Etiquette and Advice 272

So my FH's family hates me. They refuse to be in the same room with me and he's not allowed to even talk about me. Why? Because we dated six years ago and I was very sick and couldn't work which made my FH stressed and we broke up then. We got back together three years later under the condition that...

So my FH's family hates me. They refuse to be in the same room with me and he's not allowed to even talk about me. Why? Because we dated six years ago and I was very sick and couldn't work which made my FH stressed and we broke up then. We got back together three years later under the condition that even if I'm sick I need to work somehow. I have fibromyalgia, chronic migraines and back problems. I work online now and work part-time. This isn't good enough for them and about nine months ago sent me letters telling me to break up with my FH because they don't think I love him. He is very soft spoken but did take a stand for me on that issue.

Well, he wants his family at the wedding - can't blame him. I am worried that they won't show and how that might feel for him. If they do come, he wants his sister, brother-in-law (who sent the letter) and brother to be his groomsmen. I would prefer they aren't but he has a right to have them.

What can I do to make this easier?

272 Comments

  • X
    Expert August 2015
    xxxxxx ·
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    PP, I assure you, nobody could ever cause me to harm myself. Yes, my feelings are hurt. Yes, what she said was, in my opinion, more hurtful than what others said. But, I will cry for a little bit and get over it.

    No need to get me banned, I'll leave on my own. But, how can you get me banned when I haven't said anything worse than others? Hypocrite.

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  • Deborah
    Dedicated September 2017
    Deborah ·
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    Snarky - Where does it say I go hiking?

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  • StarFromIHJ
    Master August 2016
    StarFromIHJ ·
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    What the heck is going on in this thread?

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  • OriginalRandi
    Master November 2015
    OriginalRandi ·
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    O&S, because everybody is dancing around it and won't say what was brought up. I was asking if somebody could just go ahead and enlighten those of us who missed it. I was being tongue in cheek about asking if there were a legal way it could happen because of the rules WWKatie mentioned earlier in this thread.

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  • Pancakes
    Master October 2015
    Pancakes ·
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    Deborah - Page 2 you said it:

    "Also he knows that my job makes me very happy. I don't just work my job when i can. I live my job. I'm an ESL (English as a Second Language) Teacher for adults. And I go out of my way to help them and even host them in my house for "dry" birthday parties. I've even gone hiking with some just to make them feel welcome for their brief stay in America."


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  • Lauren B.
    Master October 2015
    Lauren B. ·
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    @Nothappening- you're not going to get banned.

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  • LB
    Master May 2014
    LB ·
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    OP Deborah, aren't you partly asian?

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  • X
    Expert August 2015
    xxxxxx ·
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    I honestly had NO idea that I couldn't bring up something from cf. If I'd known, I'd never have said it. It wasn't anything bad. I promise you guys, this is my last post and I won't be back ever again.

    Again, I'm so sorry for offending anyone with my comment about working mothers. I should have made my point with a little more tact. I WISH at least one parent could stay home with the kids.

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  • StarFromIHJ
    Master August 2016
    StarFromIHJ ·
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    @Nothappening. Go seek help. No one should be this upset over the internet.

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  • MrsPej
    VIP October 2015
    MrsPej ·
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    There is definitely no "legal" way you can be informed. This is a public, open forum. Any Friday, anyone, anywhere can look at Confession Friday, copy and paste, screenshot, or just remember what someone said, and post it anywhere they want. The internet never forgets.

    ETA - sorry Randi saw your follow up after. I thought you were serious lol.


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  • LB
    Master May 2014
    LB ·
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    Oh please, NH, it's a public forum. Don't freaking leave. You made everyone's day!

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  • OriginalRandi
    Master November 2015
    OriginalRandi ·
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    Lol sorry everybody who was confused about my legal comment, I was definitely joking, sorry I didn't make it clearer.

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  • LB
    Master May 2014
    LB ·
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    I'd like to kind of know too...I posted something and then hid it.

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  • JAL2015
    VIP May 2015
    JAL2015 ·
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    Tuesdays are getting better than Wednesdays!

    Can I just say that I read every single comment on this thread in the last 15 minutes i have at work. Why did you remove every comment you posted if You (@NotHappening) didn't say anything bad? Those were the only comments that were removed, except for shoe peen of course lol

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  • OMW
    Master August 2013
    OMW ·
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    Damn. I'm actually on during the day (no work, no work!), leave for an hour and a half to go to FedEx and the post office, and I miss shoe peen and other drama.

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  • LB
    Master May 2014
    LB ·
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    Trashy Tuesdays?

    Wait - maybe she got banned @leahy? That happens when you leave I think?

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  • LB
    Master May 2014
    LB ·
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    She changed her name to xxxxxx.

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  • Lucy
    Master April 2015
    Lucy ·
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    This shit show is still going?? Glad I got to take a nap and come back to read it. Seriously NH, seek help.

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  • Emmy
    Master January 2015
    Emmy ·
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    This post is ridiculous and just absurd


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  • OriginalRandi
    Master November 2015
    OriginalRandi ·
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    Messaged ya back Christine!

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