KGroenwold
Super October 2015

FMIL is my nightmare-VENT

KGroenwold, on July 23, 2015 at 3:55 PM Posted in Planning 0 9
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We have been waiting MONTHS for her to get us her list of people she would like to come to the wedding. All the invites are assembled, stamped, sealed and ready to be put in the mail. Only problem is we are waiting on her to get her family's mailing addresses. Now before you all tell me to do it myself... I have tried to contact this woman dozens of times to even get telephone numbers so I can do it myself...she just never responds to me. I'm not kidding. So my FH has been texting her repeatedly to get them and she says she will send us the numbers as soon as she can. It's been months.I'm at my breaking point with this woman.

9 Comments

  • Della
    VIP July 2015
    Della ·
    • Flag

    Tell her that if she doesn't get them to you by the end of next week (generous time frame considering) they won't be invited.

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  • -
    VIP February 2017
    -- ·
    • Flag

    Do you have names at least? Could your FH reach out to any of them on FB (if they have it)?

    They may also have addresses for others on the list.

    Just as a plan B since your FMIL seems to be really dragging her heels on this.

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  • KD
    Super December 2015
    KD ·
    • Flag

    THAT'S BS, your wedding is in October! 1 week deadline or they are NOT invited.

    I assume FH already reached out to anyone really important to him. The rest... too mad, Ma!

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  • KGroenwold
    Super October 2015
    KGroenwold ·
    • Flag

    Unfortunately, no names. My FH has never even met them (they are in the States, we are in Canada). We have my FFIL's list and he gave us full addresses, phone numbers and even some emails. He has been so helpful. FMIL doesn't even speak to me, seriously, FH and I have been together 8 years and I have yet to get a Happy Birthday from her. She doesn't do family stuff well. Would it be bad to say she is no longer allowed to bring anyone? Also, I hate to say this, but if she doesn't invite anyone, I have NO CLUE who we could put her with.

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  • Rebecca
    Master November 2015
    Rebecca ·
    • Flag

    Give her a hard deadline. i.e., I need these addresses by the end of Saturday or they're not invited. It sucks, but I have to do this with my mom too for all sorts of things and it works much better when I give a deadline.

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  • AthenaKay
    Master June 2015
    AthenaKay ·
    • Flag

    Yeah I would be pissed. I would tell her to give you the names and contact info by x date or they aren't invited.

    ETA: As bad as she's being, you should still allow her to bring someone. You'll still have to put up with her after the wedding. And that's at least one thing you can give her I guess.

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  • -
    VIP February 2017
    -- ·
    • Flag

    So sorry you're having to deal with this behaviour from her. Definitely agreeing with previous posters - she needs a firm deadline and if she still doesn't give addresses, those on her list won't get invites.

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  • Soon to be Mrs. HLR!!
    Super October 2015
    Soon to be Mrs. HLR!! ·
    • Flag

    I would have FH tell her that invites are going on out X date, if you do not have the names and addresses of the people she would like to invite before then they will not be invited. Make it a clear statement and do not just ask for the addresses.

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  • KGroenwold
    Super October 2015
    KGroenwold ·
    • Flag

    Honestly, I felt like I was going above what was needed even telling her to give me a list. No limit on how many or anything. I am just so annoyed. She even tried to make my FH feel guilty because we aren't super close with them.

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