Bridesmaid to matron of honor

This is why you wait until 8 months before you ask your wedding party.

Op- I would really like to know what you found so offensive about the responses you got. Trust me when I say this is quite tame compared to some threads that roll through here.

APD every person that I asked to be in my party is either my family or people I have known for 20+ years.

You should still wait until you are at least 8 months out. People you think you can trust can always prove you wrong.

@Kim. Your relationship with them can still change or end entirely in the next 2 years, and then you'll still be stuck with them as a bridesmaid.

@kim that's awesome that they've been in your life so long, but if you have already asked them and given them their titles (bridesmaid or maid of honor) then you can't change those titles without hurting feelings. Eta: clarity

Someone's feelings will get hurt if you do this, even though I'm sure you don't intend for that to happen

Futurerand - I guess I'm not use to forums. Sorry for being misinterpreted about what was going on

First off, you're way too early to ask your wedding party. Stop already.

Secondly, you asked her to play a role (prematurely), now suck it up and live with it. "Upgrading" her at this point is as bad as replacing someone. You're doing it as an afterthought. Stop it.

Finally, your name calling and jabs against the community in your OP are vios. Flagged. We aren't a support group here. We are here for blunt, honest advice. If you didn't like what you got from most of us, the problem is more likely you than us. Grow up and grow a thicker skin.

Ok now I'm sorry for asking my wedding party already? 'My sister, 'my cousin, my Soon To Be sister in law and my two friends who I have known literally forever

PPs are right, she doesn't become matron of honor just because she's married. She shouldn't be offended by still being a bridesmaid, because no one expects to be matron of honor just because they're married.

It would, however, probably offend and upset your current MOH to add another. You would be making her feel less important/special if you just arbitrarily added another honor attendant.

People come on the forums all the time trying to figure out what to do because one of their family members or "forever friends" is no longer close with them or they want to kick them out because of some drama, or they want to upgrade someone or add another bridesmaid afterwards. Each of these things is very rude and causes a lot of problems so the suggested time is about 8 months before the wedding.

@Kim. I was perfectly friendly with one of my cousins until about 2 years ago we had 1 argument and now we can't even talk to one another. Relationships can change in 5 minutes, no matter how strong you think it is.

Oh and Kim there was a bride posting here about a week ago that hadn't asked her bridal party yet and she's glad she waited because one of the girls she was going to ask LITERALLY COPIED AND THEN TRIED TO USE THE BRIDES CREDIT CARD.

Sorry Kim. Sounds like you don't like to have fun at all and are waaaaaaay to serious in life. I thought Kathleen's Honker joke was hikarious..

I think you need to chill out Kim. Just chill. Take it easy. Let it go. You are letting strangers affect you. And you are taking it waaaaaaay far left.

Sorry we aren't all bubble wrapped and sugar coated, but this isn't elementary. No one offended you. Listen to the good advice you have. A bridesmaid is a bridesmaid.. no upgrading bc of marriage

MNA. Thank you for your reply. I'll take that one to the heart. Like I said in a previous post, you have NO idea what kind of sh*t people are currently going through and to call someone out online is so childish. You don't know me. I don't know you. But I can tell you one thing about myself is that I'm not gonna bash someone over social media. And did I say I didn't like the responses? No. just the way they were said. I got my answers and there's no reason to turn this discussion now over about how soon it took me to ask my bridal party. I know numerous of women that got married and asked their bridal party first thing and everything worked out.

I have never seen or heard of waiting 8 months to ask a bridal party. And I talked to a lot of wedding planners / brides. I can 100% say that I am certain nothing will happen to my bridal party.. and I would be glad to prove that to you guys after the wedding.

You said you didn't like the responses when you were constantly complaining about all of them and saying they were insults and people mocking you. So to answer your question, yes you did say you didn't like the responses.

It's an Internet forum so they can answer however they would like as long as it's within CGs. You aren't always going to get responses that are sunshine and rainbows, and sometimes people like to have a little fun instead of being so serious and unable to take a joke.

Well 98% of the brides here will tell you to wait, and there are many that will tell you from their own experiences. However, you are definitely free to prove us wrong after the wedding. No one is stopping you.

If nothing happens, that's awesome! But we see stories about girls needing to drop a bridesmaid because their relationship went sour damn near every day. It can happen to anyone, and we suggest 8 months to try and limit the odds of it breaking up a wedding party.