How to tactfully request cash in lieu of gifts?

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There's no tactful or appropriate way to request cash. Your best bet is to create a very small registry and spread the word that you'd prefer cash. Check out Amazon, it has much more than household items.

Congrats and happy planning!

No, there is no tactful or polite way to do this.

Agree, make a small registry and people will probably get the idea.

Courtney,

think it's something that a lot of brides might want to do but aren't sure how or if they should go about it. My fiancé and I decided that we were going to go the more traditional route and register at a few places. But I know of two weddings recently that handled gifts a bit differently that you might want to consider. My cousin was married recently and he and his wife requested gift cards to specific places such as Bed Bath and Beyond. That way they knew they could purchase things that they really needed. Another wedding I went to just didn't put anything on the invitation that mentioned where they were registered and let guest give gifts in a way that they see fit.

Have a wishing well reception

We made a commitment ...

We made a commitment,

some time ago,

that together through life,

we were destined to go.

To save you looking,

shopping and buying,

here is an idea,

we hope you'll like trying!

Come to our wedding,

to wish us both well,

and please make a donation,

to our wishing well.

_______

We don't want to offend ...

We don't want to offend,

but we have it all,

household goods,

and so much more.

To save you shopping,

looking and buying,

a gift of currency,

we thought you'd like trying.

Don't go overboard,

or rob any banks,

anything will make us smile,

with hearts full of thanks.

Now that we have saved,

you all the fuss,

we hope you will come,

and celebrate with us.

___________

More than just kisses ...

More than just kisses,

so far we've shared,

our home has been made,

with love and care.

Most things we need,

we've already got,

And in our home,

we can't fit a lot!

A wishing well,

we thought would be great,

But only if,

you wish to participate,

A gift of money,

is

Any cute poems that you see, I would put on your WEDDING WEBSITE under "registry"

It is considered rude to have poems, registry card, or any type of requests for money/gifts placed inside the same envelope as your wedding invitation.

Let it be told my word of mouth that you wish to have money for your honey moon. Tell your wedding party and your parents to spread the word. That way when someone asks "What do those crazy kids want?" they (and you) can reply "They (we) have everything they need, and all they really want is money to go towards the honeymoon."

Even if people are told you wish to have cash, some just like to buy gifts. So, don't be surprised if you receive gifts.

On that note....

Welcome to WW

and here is a poem... again, I suggest you place it on your wedding website if you don't wish to offend your guests.

Please join us on our special day,

Your attendance is desired.

Don't feel obliged to give a gift,

But your dancing shoes are required.

If you were thinking of giving a gift,

What would really make our day,

Is a contribution to our honeymoon,

To help us on our way.

There's no way to "tactfully" request money. Some would say even doing a honeymoon fund registry is tacky. I would suggest doing a small registry at a favorite department store, so people have the choice. Is there anything you want to upgrade? Maybe you have an old pan & you'd like a nicer one. Maybe you want some storage containers. Anything, come up with something, whether you want, need, or upgrade. Guests will give you what they choose anyway, but if all you ask for is cash & they wanted to "box" you a gift, they may just bring nothing at all.

Your FH is correct - don't bother with those honeymoon registries. Rip Off!

This is our second marriage and we had a small registry at BB&Beyond. EVERYone at our wedding who gave us a gift, gave us cash.

Small registry or no registry

We're just not registering at all. Most people know newlyweds need cash. We will have been together 7.5 years, and living together for just over 4 years come the wedding and own our own home, so needless to say most people know we really don't need any traditional household gifts.

Word of mouth works good, like for instance this christmas we told one or two people we were going to do our garden up in the new year so hardware shop vouchers would be really good, and we ended up getting a heap as everyone found out.

For our engagement party, we didn't register, and got some nice towels (really good quality), some beautiful crystal wine glasses (which we have actually used!), and other than that we mainly got money or vouchers for our major supermarket/department store chain.

So not registering works pretty well

1. Small or no registry.

2. When someone asks, say, "We really have all the household stuff we need, and are just saving up for [a house, a honeymoon, or whatever]."

That is really all you need. Guests who want to get you a gift, and don't know what you want, will do one of two things. One is that they will give cash. The other is that they will ask, and then your response will let them know cash is welcome. So why do it the tacky way, when the approved way will have the exact same effect?

If someone asks just say you are hoping to get money to pay for your honeymoon/to put towards a downpayment on a house etc. But you can't tactfully ask you have to wait till someone asks you.

Mentioning you are paying for the wedding usually helps too.

I agree with the rest of these ladies that a small or non-existent registry is the way to go.

Thank you all so much! Your responses really helped - I think we'll go wtih a small registry and hopefully get it out with word of mouth that we would prefer cash.

I'm go glad the community could help @Courtney!!

I hate all the poems. Doing something tacky does not make it less tacky because you rhyme your words.

Lol Stacy I was thinking the same thing with the poems.

I really like how 2D bride worded this "When someone asks, say, "We really have all the household stuff we need, and are just saving up for [a house, a honeymoon, or whatever]."

Ok so I got married Sept 28th 2012..... I just wanted to share my experience with this exact situation. We did not need gifts and anything we would of put on a register would of been too expensive for most of our guests, so we decided to not register anywhere and I put a slip of card stock matching my wedding invites simply saying "In lieu of gifts please donate to our Honeymoon Fund" I was a little worried that it may offend people, but then I came to the conclusion that its not just random people you are inviting.... It is friends and family that are coming to your wedding and they should know you both well enough to understand and in no way be offended. I had a great outcome from mine. I got more then I think I would of gotten otherwise. ALOT of people told me they loved the idea because they didn't have to worry about getting us something we wanted, or going shopping for a gift. Good luck and God Bless