couple holding thanks y'all sign

Photo: Monica Roberts Photography

We get it: There are a million things you’d rather be doing than writing thank-you notes right now. But the process doesn’t have to be painful. Check out these etiquette tips for writing easy (and thoughtful!) thank-you notes.


How soon after receiving a gift should I write thank-you notes?
Thank-you notes should be written as soon as possible. If a gift is received before the wedding, you have two to three weeks to send the note. For gifts received at or after the wedding, up to three months is acceptable but try not to wait that long!

Do I have to handwrite thank-you notes? Is email okay?
Yes, you must handwrite your thank-you notes. Email may be okay for sending out casual communication, but tradition rules when it comes to wedding thank-yous.

From engagement parties to showers to the actual wedding, I’m going to receive multiple gifts from many guests. Do I have to write a separate thank-you note for each gift?
Every gift deserves its own thank-you note. So, if someone gets you both a shower and wedding gift, you have to write two notes. That’s why it’s so important to stay on schedule with writing thank-you notes—you want to make sure that each gift is recognized in a timely fashion so you won’t get too backlogged.

Use a formula
Remember the following formula when it comes to content of the note: Thank the recipient for the gift + Say something specific about the gift and how you’ll use it + Thank them again for coming to the wedding (or event, if it’s a shower or engagement party gift) or express regret if they couldn’t make it.