Why having a dry/self cater wedding because of money is bull

You do realize it's also about treating your family as guests? Otherwise they'll be working (and not enjoying your wedding day). Saving money is not worth it.

Embarrassing enough to admit, my sister had a self catered wedding. (GAG!) My mother spent 2 days making food for her guests, it was a nightmare. Everyone, including our grandmother complained about how cheap and selfish she was until the day she died, 14 years later. People were in the parking lot drinking and many left early. She also used Friendors, one of which was the photographer. He didn't use a flash at all. She has zero wedding pictures, which in retrospect is a blessing because her wedding was so shitty. Once you invite guests, the day ceases to be about you. Host people properly.

I really want the people upvoting the white knights to explain themselves. Y'all know better!

My aunt didn't ask for gifts either...didn't change the fact that no one had time to enjoy the wedding because they were working.

@SoonToBeMrsSandell I am sorry but I think you need to rethink about hosting your guests. I am sure many people on WW live a sober life and why can't we have wine and beer at a wedding??? This is nonsense.

You know if my fiance and I are paying for our own wedding why do I even care what any of you think? Oh wait I don't! Your guilt trips and hate spewing didn't work on me. Have a nice day!

Danielle - the number of posts about guests talking crap and complaining behind the couple's back and you think ALL YOUR GUESTS ARE OK WITH THIS???

No one is guilt tripping you or anything. We are basically saying what your guests won't say to your face.

You may never truly know how awful this may be on your guests/family/friends because they won't say it to your face. But in your case, you probably don't care since you won't know.

@Danielle no one will tell you your wedding sucked to your face but they will definitely talk about it. So you're going to give them wine and no food? Makes sense

Danielle... Me thinks thou doth protest too much.

Piggybacking on @KatieB -- I've been to some terrible weddings. Not a single word have I ever said to the couples' face or anyone I thought would let them know what I said.

You're delusional if you think people are going to be okay with what you're doing simply because no one has said anything.

@Danielle It's fine you do you. My FH and I are paying for our our wedding and we will make our guests happy.

Also, the whole "three chefs in the family" thing makes me so sad.

Mostly because you are forcing three members of your family to work on a day that they deserve to celebrate. Rude.

Danielle people are trying to make you see that what you are doing is flat out wrong, selfish, tacky, rude EVERYTHING. What the fuck kind of gift are you giving your guests if you can't even give them FOOD AND BOOZE?

Can;t wait for these white knights to have to clean, cook and slave away at another friend/family's wedding. I'm sure they will be so happy as well.

Danielle, your guests will never tell you to your face that your wedding sucked. They will talk about it behind your back, for years to come. Trust me on this because I have been a guest at an improperly hosted wedding. It has been three years and we're still talking about, but the bride and groom have never heard a word of it.

Stop everyone! They are paying for their own weddings!!! 'Cause, you know, none of the rest of us adulty people are.

I had to eat hummus off a napkin at a recent wedding. Did I go up to the bride and say something to her face? Absolutely not, but H and I sure talk about it!

Of course no one is going to complain directly to you.

Hummus off a napkin? What the freak?!

If you have a dry wedding, people will either drink in the parking lot or bring a flask. Or both.

I went to a wedding 2 years ago that I was 50/50 on whether it would be a cash bar. I brought their gift in cash/20's in case it was because guess where the cash for the cash bar would have come from? Yeah. People will absolutely talk about you behind your back if you don't provide at least beer/wine and a decent meal.