Why having a dry/self cater wedding because of money is bull

Thank you. Priorities should always be on providing the best time for your guests, not seeing how many people you can stretch the budget to barely accommodate to get the most gifts and cash.

YAS! If you can't properly accommodate your guest, wait until you can.

.

We're not having a dry wedding because I'm on a budget, but because we're getting married at our church which doesn't allow alcohol and my FH's is against drinking.

No crowdfunding or self catering/potluck wedding will be found on my day though.

OnceUponAChambers- you aren't asking for advice about your dry wedding which is fine. I personally always say, you want to do it, fine. OWN it. Don't ask for opinions and advice on the issue and then get bootybothered that you don't like the responses. If you're prepared to get side eyed, and talked about by your guests, but have chosen not to care because getting married in your church that doesn't allow alcohol proves to be more important to you, then you do you, boo. No sarcasm intended. That being said, my curiosity is so peaked by the statement "My FH is against drinking." I am not trying to start a fight, I am just genuinely curious what that means? Or I guess, why? Does he judge those who drink?

If its at your church I would assume its a cake and punch type reception not at a meal time? If so, I think its fine.

I have no issue with a dry wedding for religious conviction.

There is really no excuse for a dry wedding except;

1. it's in a church

2. everyone is in recovery

3. everyone is underage

4. you're cheap.

Agreed

I am really tired of people on this site who put down other people for stuff like this. It's not your place to shame people about their financial situation which is what you were doing. This post has nothing to do with your own wedding. We are college students about to go into grad school on a tight budget so yes it will be a dry wedding and yes we will be self catering. The food will be amazing and if you need a drink to be happy for me and want to attend my marriage then I don't want you there because that's incredibly selfish. A friend or family member should be understanding of you staying within your means. Also this idea of putting off your wedding till you can afford to do it "right" is ludicrous. Should I put off my marriage because you want to drink it to know the food came from a catering services?

No, you should go to the courthouse because that is all you can afford.

What are you serving? egg salad?

Adria: This is the general expectation. If you don't have as much money, invite less people. Don't celebrate during meal time. Hell, get married at city hall with immediate family/friends and then go to a restaurant or elope. SO MANY CHOICES!

CAN I GET AN AMEN!

"Also this idea of putting off your wedding till you can afford to do it "right" is ludicrous. Should I put off my marriage because you want to drink it to know the food came from a catering services?"

Um, YES. Yes you should. Learn to be an adult and properly host your guests, @Adria.

"if you need a drink to be happy for me ... then I don't want you there"

Adria, just stop.

Adria, don't be offended then. You have your reasons for doing it your way, just do it. But when it comes to etiquette, your way is a fail.....that's all we want you to understand.

Adria, you don't have to have a big blow-out wedding. Go to the courthouse, have dinner afterwards. You are no less married. You don't need a $3,000 dress, you don't need to spend $7,500 on a venue. Pay for the wedding you can afford, but host the hell out of it.

OHH Adria

Also Adria who's taking your photos? Uncle terry?

I hope the peels come off easy, that's labor intensive.

Wait--someone who doesn't want to wait to properly host their wedding or cut their guest list to a number that she can actually afford and not put her guests' health in danger by self catering really just called US selfish??