Wedding planning - how did you pick your date?

It was very hard for us! I had a meltdown about it the day after we got engaged 😂 FH is a police officer and getting a lot of time off is hard because he accumulates vacation time so slowly. We were thinking June 2020, but I was worried that would be too late because my family is moving overseas in the summer. My mom suggested Easter weekend in April 2020 so we went with that!

Avoid Saturdays. Choose a venue and see what they have available. I changed my date bc the venue was cheaper on a different day😊

I definitely wanted a fall wedding and my FH didn’t want it too close to the holidays, so we went from there the venue we picked had verano dates available so we picked from that.

We didnt have a special date but we agreed on the season and the available dates at the venue and season discount made our decision!

To choose a date:

1. Season. What time of year?

2. Eliminate or include family holidays and special dates (Is everyone in town for a baptism, does everyone already travel for grandpa's birthday, who is graduating, having a special occasion, do you and your FH have a significant date (anniversary, etc), etc.).

3. Ask venues when they have open dates the correspond to your open/preferred dates...

4. Budget. How much do you want to spend?
5. Benefit/cost evaluation. Which venue offers what you'd like, that you can afford, that is convenient for guests to get to, that meets any specific requirements that you have (Our mothers have MS so we needed a location that doesn't involve a lot of walking. Think of those kinds of things.).

Hope this helps a little! *I consider a date set once you know the date and have a venue. Without a venue the date isn't set.

View Quoted Comment We did the exact same thing

We knew we wanted October and when we found the venue they had either the 17th or 24th available and we liked the 17th better.

We picked based on weather temperature, rainy season, and budget. We live in Florida so a Thursday in February guaranteed a cheaper venue rate, no rain, and (hopefully) lower temps.

It was so hard to figure out! My sister was married in the fall so we didn’t want to do the same month as her, and winter is too cold. I run CRAZY hot and sweat for no reason sometimes, so any hot month was out. We live in NC so it’s hot from like April-October. So we settled on March. Still a spring wedding but I won’t be dying in the heat!

We picked ours as close to the date we made our relationship official

I wanted to have a fall 2019 wedding, but then, when I realized Leap Day 2020 was on a Saturday, I thought that’d be such a cool date to get married on! FH agreed so we decided to push it back to Leap Day, which worked well with our schedule since we only had 2 weekends we could’ve gotten married in the fall (because we’re huge Alabama football fans and weren’t going to get married on a game day weekend)!

I’ve always wanted a fall wedding (summer is way too hot in AL). But it interferes with football. So we chose a date where there is no football interference and it’s a holiday weekend for some.

We decided on this year. Then he wanted his best friend there who works for NHRA racing so he called him and he was off the weekend of June 6, so june 6th it is! Lol it also would be his parents 50th wedding anniversary so it's kind of a special date

We picked the venue that we wanted and then we went with a date that they had available. We knew summer time so you might want to pick a season.

We picked our anniversary date which is Halloween. So 10/31/2021

My finace and i actually choose our anniversary date in which we first met

We had a load of family weddings and friend and family births to work around. Needed a fall date since all late spring a d summer never more than a 2 week gap between other people's things . And engaged in may, hoping to marry in 3-7 months. The resulting 4 weekends, the only ones at least 3 weeks either side of a family thing, and after 2 of his sibs and 2 cousins married, and 2 sibs and cousins of mine married. Those 4 weeks, a friend off work computer screened, and read ads in mags and papers (2008), called venues in the area of the Catskills a comfortable halfway drive between our major groups of friends and family. 2 dates were available in October, at more than 10 places that generally fit our requirements. The 2 places we liked best, another couple had seen the day before, were holding for 2 days. The manager of one called the people. Their favorite was our second choice, their 2nd was our favorite. But the weird thing was, weeks before a friend from NYC whom T wanted for Best Man, got engaged to someone from his Grad school. We we're in Boston and NH, had not shared news, wanting a date and venue, first. It was them. So we divvied things up. And My T and his friend T could not have each other as BM. So, ours was more a process of elimination conflicting things in our big families, and what we found where we wanted on 2 dates, narrowed to one day that our top choices were both still open. When I read of people who pick a day and month by favorite numbers, or who think all friends and family of a couple should not marry within 3 months either side ( or fussy folks, in the same year) as others, I break out laughing. It is hard simply giving others a few weeks . And to those who said, why don't you wait til next spring/ summer/ fall, well 5 of our siblings and 4 cousins closeby, were already set with dates for the next year. **** So if lots of other people have inflexible schedules, or events that matter to them, do the best you can. And accept, you cannot please everyone, and will go nuts from stress if you try. And do not be frightened off by people who say, you have to start 12-15 months ahead, or everything will be booked. Because at months 4,5,and 6 months from our engagement, there were plenty of a ailable dates at venues and services. So many people book too early, then things change. Split up, put off, lower price, larger crowd needs, make cancellations. And at that point venues offer very good deal below advertised prices
My first marriage was to an only child, son of 2 only child parents. No family but mom, dad, 2 grandmothers and HIM. And they were so impossible due to being spoiled and wanting their own way ( parents and grandparents) that they were harder for us to work around than current hubby's 12 brothers and sister and their spouses and kids, and about 30 families of aunts, uncles, cousins. To find a workable date, you need to choose a few key people who must be there, then plan when available. You cannot please everyone. Don't try.

View Quoted Comment Same here!

My fiancé and I decided on our Anniversary and I went through the calendar for the years to come and decided 2023 was the year because our anniversary falls on a friday!

We wanted to get married on our anniversary weekend!! Luckily this was in the season we wanted to get married (fall) and not in our venue’s “peak” season which we couldn’t afford. If we had a December anniversary date or something else non-fall we likely would have selected our venue first and then picked the date based on venue availability.