the dreaded bachelor party

Relax if you can trust him to go out with out you on any other day then you need to know he wont do anything that day ... and you should try and have it so both yours and his parties are on the same day that way you will be out having a great time and wont think about it to much. stay calm all will be fine

I get antsy thinking about my FH's bachelor party too, and even thought I know he wouldnt do anything to hurt me, I just dont trust his friends lol. He has a bunch of single army friends that like to party like crazy, and even though they are going to casino town im sure one of them will get the idea to have a stripper. But my FH and I have already set rules for each other, and I trust him to follow them, and his friends know I will kick some a** if they decide to do otherwise.

I'm less worried about strippers and more worried about general havoc by his groomsmen. Would hate for any fights to happen or for anyone to get arrested.

I am absolutely, 100% not even caring about this. My FH doesn't want anything typical, and I do! Yes...I want him to go to a strip club! Only because I know him and I know he would probably be so nervous and uncomfortable. But...I know his best man/brother, and they won't be doing that.

Our parties will be on different nights and I am looking forward to the evening home alone with a good book while he's out being the bachelor. Him, on the other hand, is dreading my bachelorette party (even though we won't be doing anything raunchy or bad). We definitely don't have the "normal" roles in our relationship...but that's perfect for us.

I'm like the complete opposite lol. I'm pushing for DH to have a crazy bachelor party and he's the one saying he doesn't want to feed into the stereotypical debauchery :-P. I guess I just disassociated sex and whatever with the event so to me, even if there are strippers (which hopefully there will be :-P) in my mind it's all in good fun. It's not actually something sexual. As for getting drunk and partying, well, DH is a Marine so he can handle his liquor :-P

Im worried about his lower friends constantly planting the thought in his head that this is the last time he will be out and around all the bar wh**es being 'single', and him getting caught of in the moment (if you will) or just going with the flow of things. And @ pumkins sunshine- this may sound extremely selfish of me but, I would feel alot better if he just got arrested at the beginning of the night lol although there would probably still be a 'redo' bach. party :-/

My fiance did not want a typical bachelor party either . . . he organized his own and is doing a bachelor party weekend that starts with a mud run and followed by an overnight with a barbeque... and this is boys and girls together. it is going to be so fun!

Soo... I have the only FH who actually WANTS a bachelor party and is looking forward to it??

My FH just had his party and we work together (military). In the months leading up to his party our friends (co-workers) would try to get me all spun up about the crap they were going to do during the party. Both my FH and I were a little concerned with what the guys would try to pull but at the end of the night everyone had fun, we are still getting married and none of our friends are getting divorced (that we know of). Your FH is going to do whatever he wants to do regardless, go out with your friends and get your mind off his night out. (That's what I did). I think your going to find the guys try to get you to believe something happened that didn't just because they think it is funny.

My DS went to Miami with a group of guy friends for the weekend. I trust DS. I also trust his boys - they're all friends with me as well, they've outgrown stupid frat boy crap, and they respect our relationship. I know they drank a lot, and went to a strip club, but I haven't asked for details because it's none of my business and I don't really care.

It sounds to me like you're worried your FS is associating with low-class guys. Have you talked to him about it, in a nonconfrontational way? "I trust you, but I know your guy friends can be the 'boys will be boys' type. Do you think they'll try to pressure you into anything you'd regret, if so, how do you plan to react?"

Then have a joint party. Thats what we are doing and its going to be a blast! Sorry but if it is seriously causing you that much anxiety I would have told my FH in a heartbeat that I didn't feel comfortable with it. Have you talked to him about it? Strippers and partying aren't for everyone and thats OK. Just be honest with him about it. He should also respect your feelings. If he doesn't thats a bigger problem then his Bach party!

Also..I wouldnt be so comfortable with him going out solo all the time with people I know cheat on their SO. That doesnt exactly sound like a recipe for success.

Its just one friend of his that I dont like, hes not even in the wedding party but he will probably be going. The rest will be his BM (an friend of his who we both work with who seems to me to be very mature), his 2 groomsmen who are his cousins, and maybe another friend from work who I dont know that well but im not really worried about him. I have brought up my feeling about this awful friend of his (nothing to do with the bach party though) he just always says 'just because he does it, doesnt mean I do it' This friend of his is soo nice to his fiance and other then that treats her very well. If I were her, I would never suspect him cheating. I feel really bad when she is around us because she is happy but has no idea what he does but im not close to her so im in no place to tell her. He makes it clear that he cheats even when im around. He went out with FH an I once and he took his ring off when he seen there was alot of 'hot girls'. It just makes me think...

CONT. If he can hide it so well, what about my FH?

I dont care about strippers though. Im fine with him going to a strip club its just the other random girls at the bar.

I have a hard time with this too...my FH is actually going out of town for 3 days for his bachelor party, so consider yourself lucky it's only one night. I'm pushing his best man to take him to NY...as he's deciding whether or not he's going to take him there or Las Vegas...maybe plan your bachelorette party on the same evening so you can have your girls help you take your mind off of it

I dont mean to be rude as I know these are your feelings (along with what seems 50% of brides) but I just dont get it. If you have any concern what so ever of your partner cheating on the day of the bachelor/bachelorette party then whether or not you admit it out loud you have that concern all the time. Maybe this is a result of their actions or due to an experience you have had in the past, either way it is an issue that needs to be fully addressed. Saying "I do" will not suddenly make those feelings go away.

We are having a skating party the night before the wedding so everyone can get together and hang out. Neither of us really wanted to have the standard bachelor and bachelorette parties. I'm excited except for the fact that I can't really skate!

If I were you, I would try to see if he would do a joint party.

Mine will probably end up hiking with friends for his.. I think ill be the one going out with the ladies but he wont be concerned. I wouldn't be concerned if he wanted to go out either.

Amen Aimee

My DH went to Myrtle Beach for Labor Day weekend. I was more concerend about drunk tanks and broken limbs than anything. As long as it healed before the wedding I was going to be happy. I agree with Shannon, just try talking to him about that one friend, non nonconfrontational is the way

Mine wants to play paint ball and get drunk.

We both made some rules and will stick to them. I trust him. There's nothing else I can really do b/c I want him to have this fun experience. If I were to keep bringing it up, he probably wouldn't be able to have fun for his party.