Small wedding big reception

I wouldn't go to a wedding reception if I wasn't invited to the actual ceremony. So you're absolutely right in thinking that people won't want to go.

Thank you. That's what I thought

What is a small wedding? If you are having just immediate family (parents, siblings, grandparents), this is fine. I have been to several celebrations that had intimate ceremonies, often for religious reasons, and then a larger party after. But if you start inviting some friends and aunts/uncles/cousins but not others it becomes a bit rude.

This is NOT a tiered wedding. A tiered wedding is being invited to the ceremony, but not the reception.

It is very acceptable to have a small ceremony and invite a large group to the reception.

@kathy so you're inviting people to come celebrate you and give you gifts, but not to witness the moment it happens? I've never heard of this and it most definitely isn't acceptable unless the couple is going to the court house to get married and having a celebration of marriage at a different time.

We are in the very early stages. My 1 week of engagement is Wednesday so I just want a view

Where are in? In the UK basically every wedding is like this but I've learned that in the USA this is considered to be very rude

Future Mrs G, this is totally acceptable, has been for years. Many people have a small ceremony, then a large reception. If you do it the other way around, it is rude.

You may want to Google it, or look this up in a wedding experts page (or book).

"A: More and more couples are opting to have intimate family ceremonies and larger receptions to include all their relatives and friends. You may feel like you're missing out on the poignant part, but at least you'll be there to party with the bride and groom. It is acceptable to extend an invite only to the reception."

Whether it's rude or not really depends on whether the ceremony is truly intimate. By that, just your immediate family. It's worked if the ceremony #'s are less than 10% of the reception. Otherwise, yes, it's awkward.

Guest A: wasn't that a lovely ceremony.

Guest B: what ceremony?

Common sense would dictate that there is scope for hurt feelings.

Oh I'll get right on that. Thanks.

I don't see why everyone can't be at the ceremony unless the ceremony space is limited. Unlike receptions, it doesn't cost more per person unless you're renting chairs.

We are eloping, still to be decided if our parents are going. We are hiring a videographer and photographer. This is in January. Once we get the footage back our plan is to rewear our wedding clothes, and show the footage at a reception. There is probably at the most 30-40 people. No one sees this rude at all, or at least I haven't heard so. Most are relieved they do not have to travel out of state, brave the cold, and spend money. Then again their mentality might be different because we are having a more intimate reception with family only.

I've been to several wedding receptions without being at the ceremony. It's totally fine and your friends should be happy that you want to celebrate with them, even if you want the ceremony to be smaller/private.

I had never heard of this until I came here. If I found out I was just invited to a reception and not the ceremony, I’d be re-evaluating my relationship with the couple.

I honestly personally disagree with the aunts/uncles/cousins not being invited if it is a personal/intimate ceremony. Maybe it's a cultural thing. If you consider someone family, they ARE family.

I feel the same way. I tried yo explain this to my FH but it's not clicking lol

Ah an elopement is different and since you will replay the ceremony then op it's not rude at all.

He's super shy

My FH is super shy too. One reason why we are having a smaller ceremony.

Are you enviting more to the reception