Please DO NOT HAVE A WEDDiNG Reception and invite more than you can afford...

She said "WEDDING" ....why are people confusing a wedding with MARRIAGE? Anyone can afford to get married, anywhere, anytime without guests.

Thank you Ladies and Glenn. As Glenn stated previously, the ones that are getting offensive are the ones this feed was meant for. I am speaking from experience, that is all. I never said do not get married...I said do not have a wedding. No matter who they are friends or family No one is happy to sit in a crowded hot space with only hot water to drink and nothing to eat for six hours while you parade around like a little princess in your $5,000 gown.

I’m only serving dessert at my reception, because frankly I don’t want to pay for a three coarse meal for every person there. Obviously this is stated in my invitations, but based on your post I shouldn’t even have a wedding because of this? I think you are being rude to expect all these things. Clearly weddings are more about the guests to you than the actual bride and groom. Any person that has an issue with my reception is probably not someone I want there.

Haley- It really depends on what time your reception is and if you expect people to stick around and dance.

I went to a 2 o'clock wedding that ended with a 1 hour punch and dessert reception. No problem there, no one was expecting dinner at that hour and everyone left after to go home and have dinner or go out.

However, if you do your wedding at 6 and then only feed people cake they will not want to stay more than an hour because they will be hungry.

Do yourself a favor Haley. Cut your guest list and only have the people you really want there. Doesn't sound like you care all that much about your guests.

Haley- Believe it or not, a wedding CEREMONY and the MARRIAGE are completely about the couple. However, the RECEPTION is about your guests. Period.

Rats. I just realized that Glenn said the same thing as my above comment. Next time I'll read the whole thread first

@ Haley- as long as its clearly stated in your invitations so your guests know to eat before hand- I see nothing wrong with it. However, if your ceremony starts at 5pm and the reception plans on going til 11pm- you do need to give your guests something to eat at some point other than cake.

it all depends on timing in my opinion- and if you give your guests fair warning as to what to expect.

That's OK KKCB...it looks like it needed repeating for Haley's sake.

Haley as long as your guests know ahead of time then they have no reason to complain. I believe I stated before, that communication is very important. I know the majority of couples are paying for their own wedding. I do not believe I said I was expecting a four course meal, what I was expecting was a meal and something other to drink than water with no ice. FH and I would have had something to eat before the wedding and planned to do a bar or something close to the venue after the reception if we had known before.

I'm calling troll on Haley

Lol Glenn.

@Tina M I agree with you 100%! people do get caught up watching these wedding shows and think thats the way a wedding is supposed to be! Weddings arnt really about THE BRIDE AND GROOM, its about IMPRESSING your GUESTS! Plain and simple! YOUR putting out thousands and thousands of dollars for ONE DAY just for ENTERTAINMENT. You do have the ones that take out loans and money out of there 401k just to pay for a wedding. Get real! Its not about the GUESTS! Its about the BRIDE and GROOM. They should have had enough food for everyone. Regardless if it was cheese and crackers or sandwhiches, whatever the case maybe. Its an honor to be invited to be at someones wedding. Things happen. Dont go in debt to impress other people, because at the end of the day you still have to live.

@ Hailey O.. if your wedding is in the evening and you are serving just dessert then you did right by informing your guest. But dont expect for your guest to very stay long. You could do a 2hr reception. whatever you want! Dont let these people make you feel bad.

To the brides that say "it's all about me," I invite you to post that information on your wedding website. Say these words, "This is a day about ME, and my FH. This is not about YOU. So please come prepared to sit for hours, be grateful for the bird seed I'm feeding you, and don't you dare stop on the way home to eat because you're starving. I own you."

The one point on which I would disagree is that you are treating a ceremony in which you get married privately as not being a wedding. Sorry, but if you start a ceremony single, and end it married, it is a wedding. See Miss Manners on this. Treating a private or courthouse wedding as not being a wedding is rather insulting to those who choose (for financial or other reasons) to have a very small wedding.

I would rephrase the headling as, "Don't have a wedding for more people than you can afford to host."

People People.. we are taking this wayyyy out of context. I simply stated if you do not have the money do not have the wedding. If you have 1k for a budget and want a high-end venue and invite 166 people, you are headed for a disaster. I am not ungrateful, nor am I being a picky bishhhh. I am trying to avoid someone's embarrassment. If you feel you are the only one who is important on Your day.. Kudos to you. So happy for you. For the ladies who care about their guests, I hope I helped. For FH and I, our guest are the more important. They are family and friends who molded us and stood by us. Helped us to grow as people and as a couple. Our ceremony is a celebration of our love for each other. The reception is our THANK YOU to all who have had a part of our story.

BUT I WANT MY DAMN $10,000 GOWN! Guests will be happy with party pies and soda water right? Haha jokes I'll be lucky to spend a 5th of the food cost on my dress. I think that is my biggest pet peeve, people who spend lots of money on something stupid like the dress or flowers and then the food is a complete let down.

I will do that 2d bride... May I copy your suggested phrase?

Certainly, Phyllisann M.!

Thank you. 2d.