No Sex Before Marriage

I don't think God discriminates between heterosexual and homosexual relationships, Lillian. I think that's just people being jackasses, as usual.

Also: asexual and poly relationships. Sorry, y'all.

Also that is not the definition of adultery

Fh and I are waiting until marriage. It's my religious belief to save sex for marriage. We are still plenty intimate, though, and I am confident that our sexual chemistry will continue to grow after we get married.

I think God does want us having sex, and he gave us orgasms as a way to enjoy sex.

Look, this is so personal that I really can't believe it's a topic here. This is between the two parties getting married, not us. None of us want to be schooled on theology, religion, or to listen to private boundaries that allow running to third base when the temperature rises, but frustratingly stops the action when the main event is what you've been leading up to while fooling around. If that's what you want, fine, but I fail to see it as a virtue. We've all made our choices, and you're making your choice.

I honestly cannot understand why two sexually mature, sexually experienced, and sexually responsible people would think it's a good idea to try to go back to virgin-hood, but I guess I'll leave that in the realm of religion and choice -- something that isn't our business. However, I always wonder, do these women not see the threads authored by new brides in this community who are being told to see a therapist because, while they love their husbands, the sex is lackluster, sparse, unfulfilling, and clumsy? Isn't that something you would want to know, or are you just relying on a deity or some kind of self-manufactured theory to make it great?

"Adultery [N] [B] [S]

conjugal infidelity. An adulterer was a man who had illicit intercourse with a married or a betrothed woman, and such a woman was an adulteress. Intercourse between a married man and an unmarried woman was fornication. Adultery was regarded as a great social wrong, as well as a great sin." http://www.biblestudytools.com/dictionary/adultery/

Doesn't say between two unmarried individuals. Words mean things, you can just change definitions willy nilly to fit your argument.

This isn't a touchy subject for me. I just said FH and I are waiting to have sex because if our personal convictions.

However, adultery is not premarital sex. That is sex happening with a partner other than your spouse. Trust me. I know. My first husband committed adultery. So please have your facts straight because that can come off very rude to someone who is a victim of adultery.

As I said before. To each their own. I respect everyone's decisions because it's really not my business what goes on in other people's sex lives.

I don't really think not having sex once you've already had sex will have anything to do with if your marriage will fail or not. I definitely haven't been abstaining from sex and it hasn't hurt my relationship.

For the love of-

Okay. Here we go.

Sex in the bible is viewed as a wonderful union between two people in love. It is, per the Bible, an exclusive right of a union. That being said, "union" can mean so many things. Dating, engaged, marriage, whatever; it is viewed, and should be, a unique expression of love between two unified people, however they may be connected.

The Bible usually refers sex to marriage in a few passages, yes, but it is definitely not in the Ten Commandments; bonus fact, adultery is defined as voluntary sex between a married person and someone else who is not their spouse, so sorry to burst any bubbles there. Anyways, in those times, did dating even really exist? No, but it does in today's day and age. Society has changed since those times; therefore, verses should be interpreted to reflect that.

Practice abstinence. Fuck your partner 24/7 in every room in the house. I don't care what your poison is, but I don't think twisting the Bible to make premarital sex out to be this horrible thing is not the way to go, especially when the Bible preaches it to be a unique, defining act of love.

ETA: And for those wanting a background check, while I may be Wiccan, I was baptised Catholic, I went to Sunday school, I also went to other Christian denomination churches, I graduated from an accredited, private Catholic college on a scholarship for my social justice projects, I've taken numerous courses in Catholic-Christianity (from its history to social ethics) per my graduation requirements, and FH is a devoted, practicing Catholic who is very open with educating me on his faith. I also know how to use Google

@Jay FTW!

@celia: I know bible well enough that god does care or he wouldn't have commanded us to abstain before marriage so you saying "he doesn't care" isn't entirely true. I don't know if we're the same religion but while god may have many different feelings or you might interpret differently it's kind of out there to say that don't you think.

But if you've had sex before then not having sex now doesn't make a difference other than you want to build up the anticipation I think?

So glad I am an atheist when i read religious bullshit like these comments.

Since you've already had sex with him, all you are doing at this point is hurting the relationship.

Sex releases hormones that help bond a couple. The absence of those hormones creates a withdrawal effect that encourages the relationship to fracture, or be strained at the very least.

And no, I don't just mean serotonin. Men have a hormone in their semen, and women in their vaginal secretions, that is unique to the individual and creates an "addiction" like craving in the body of the opposite sex. These hormones, one a person has been exposed to them, encourage further bonding and a deeper sense of emotional connection. This is also why cheating is most likely to happen where sex rarely or never happens: the withdrawal caused by the absence of the hormone encourages the fracture is the sense of satisfaction within the relationship.

I'll continue to do what's best for our relationship, thanks.

I really want to just type DICK about a million times, but I'll just answer your question instead.

I rode that dick until the day we got married, then I started riding that husband dick. Team Peen!

@BeachDreams, oh, you know, just your friendly neighborhood Spiderman

@Jay, bbwahahahaha I love that meme!

Why don't you let me know exactly which commandment this is.

Because it's not adultery, though that would be convenient.

Ugh. Religious debates on forums are so stupid.

Haven't read all the comments, I'm having a particularly lazy day.

I agree that it's no one's place to judge what does or doesn't happen in someone else's bedroom, but I asked if you've tested the merchandise out of genuine concern. I'm glad you know what you're getting into, or what's getting into you more accurately lol, and hope this works out for you because if you can keep it going, it might be fun for the two of you. No way did H and I have the willpower and like a pp said, our wedding night was still amazing. The way that man tore off my corseted wedding dress....Mmmm! Anyway, good luck!

I'll want my FH just as much later tonight as I would on our wedding night after not having sex for a year. The only difference is that there may not be a wedding night because we both would bite each other's heads off after at least a month. Lol.

Intimacy is SO important in our relationship and I can't imagine not experiencing that for so long.