Maybe I'm just dumb, but I don't get it....First Dance

Hi Julie. That's the way we are doing it. We're doing the dance first because we have a lot of elders who are coming from a long way and aren't very comfortable driving at night. They mainly want to see the first dance and then eat, so we're going to do that for them.

Julie, I don't think there is a set in stone way of doing this at all. It all depends on how you want your reception to flow.

We are doing the first dance right away. We are pretty nervous about the first dance to begin with and we want to do it before we get some drinks in us. Plus, when the dancing starts, I really don't want to stop

I agree with MekMek.... just depends on how you think it will flow better. We have no idea what we are gonna do yet. Im thinking food first cuz I'm sure I'll be pretty hungry at that point! LOL

It's your wedding do what you want! We plan on having the Dj introduce us when we come into the reception then kind of get everyone seated for dinner then do all the dance stuff, cake, etc. after that.

Some do the first dance before if they can't afford to keep the photographer during dinner.

Having the parents, wedding party and Bride and Groom announced after cocktail hour to start dinner is pretty normal.

Having the first dance before dinner is just a way to have everyone's attention. Maybe get it done before you eat so their teeth are clean and no spills on the dress/tux shirt. I do agree that it is a newer thing that I've only seen 2 times out of the 12 weddings I've been to.

Hmm, okie dokie- I was just wondering if there was a reason behind it. We are playing really awesome music the whole time and want people itching to dance as soon as they can. I am hoping that our first dance will take place no later than 8 or 8:30. Snow, that's a nice idea. Our crowd is mostly in their 40's, other than FH's parents and as far as I know, they are in for the long haul, so we don't have to worry about dancing for them early. LOL.

Hi date twin! I'm doing the same as you. Rocktail hour is while we take pics, then we will join our guests, do dinner, cake, then the first dance. Maybe we're just old fashioned. LOL

I also think alot of people do it that way because they only have the photographer for a set amount of time and want pro pics of the first dance. I am doing my grand entrance.... then dinner and speeches, then start the dance with the first dance and the father daughter dance. I think the other way feels too akward, plus we have alot of time with our photographer.

I think alot of people cut the cake right after the first dance to give the caterer/waitstaff time to cut the cake so it's ready for after dinner. I think we might do our first dance and cake cutting after dinner, because we are only having a small cake for us to cut and then a behind the scenes sheet cake to feed the masses.

Guess so, Wendy. Here's our schedule:

3:30-ceremony

4:15-pics, starting with group pic of all guests/family/bride & groom

-during this time, guests will enjoy refreshements at our church

5:30-depart church, head to Country Club

6:00-cocktails

Dinner will be served when the room is full, hopefully no later than-

7:00-dinner--2 buffet lines, for about a hundred folks

8:00-cut cake

8:15-8:30-hopefully, first dance.

We are doing first look pics in a secluded spot at the church at 2:30ish. We have our photgrapher until 9, with the deal that we pay him $85 for every hour we want him to stay later should that happen.

My goal was to have as few interruptions as possible -- I just think that when you interrupt the party sometime it never gets started again. So to me it made sense to do the grand entrance straight into the first dance. Then everyone could eat. We did toasts while we were eating and cut the cake when the last people were finishing up so by the time we started dancing after dinner/desert, we didn't have any more announcements/stuff to do.

But I think your way of doing your first dance after dinner then opening the dance floor to everyone will have the same effect. And if that's the way you like it, then go for it!!! Although, are you going to wait for everyone to get cake before you start your first dance? Because I don't think it took us more than 5min to cut the cake.

We are doing all our pics before and cutting out cocktail hour, so we aren't planning on having any sort of big entrance. We are going to dinner first (because it will already be 7pm) and then do the first dance after dinner. We will let people dance for a bit, then cut the cake around 8:30-9pm. gotta give the food time to settle in our tummies before cake.

I don't think so. I think we will cut the cake, and then let our cake guru just serve at the cake table while we have our first dance. The evening is going to be pretty loose, without a lot of structure--but also without a lot of confusing events. No special dances or games, and probably not a lot of toasts/speeches introductions. I just want everyone to have a good time and be able to eat, drink, dance, socialize at their leisure. I guess I didn't really think too much about all of this until I spend all day Sunday watching 4 Weddings--I've never watched it before. From what I gathered, every wedding is different, and as long as guests are comfortable, have a place to sit, and know when and where everything is happening, its all good.

I agree with others there are many reasons why the flow goes differently. I think it's best done with the entrance because it is @ that time you have everyone's undivided attention. I think once people start eating, drinking and music starts playing it may be kind of difficult to have everyones attention. That's the we are doing ours so that for the remainder of the night we can mingle and party and not have to worry about a schedule.

Like I said, we aren't having an entrance. Being the center of attention all day is already going to make us feel a little bit like a spectacle, and somewhat uncomfortable. The reception venue is at a club house in the middle of a lovely golf course on a canal, so we plan to take some pictures outside first while our guests have a drink--but I don't want to be out there for too long--I wanna party!!! Thanks for all of the thoughts girls. BTW-- I did make flyers to put on the tables that have the menu and the order of the evening's events, so they will all be in the know, and that should help as well.

We're doing our first dance right after cocktail hour after the Parents and Bridal Party are introduced. ~7:15. After we dance dinner is served and we do the toasts while folks are eating... after dinner we'll have some dancing, the garter, bouquet toss and the cake, then more dancing, and more dancing. :0)

I kind of like the idea of going from Grand Entrance, to First Dance, then cake cutting, and finally dinner, dessert, then dancing for all! :-)

But it can go any way you like.

I think the purpose of the entrance is that it is the first time you are ever introduced as Mr. and Mrs. at a social function. We had introductions after the cocktail hour. Then the introductions and then went right into the first dance. Then, 2 very short toasts, dinner was served and cake was cut.

There is no right way or wrong way. It's whatever works best for you.

I wanted to add....On "4 Weddings", the bride and groom were introduced and the DJ went into a high powered dance song and all guests were invited to dance. The intent ws to set the tone of the evening. However, they eventually had to slow it down with the first dance. lolol

I agree Julie - your guests are going to be happy with what you have planned whether the first dance is at the beginning or end. I also hated the idea of a "Grand Entrance" but my DH liked it. So we compromised on then just introducing us and not the whole wedding party and such. It worked out fine. I think for this sort of thing where a guest's comfort isn't at stake, it's whatever makes you the most comfortable!!