Just fired my Maid of Honor.

Oh, yes! And let me tell you...BEST decision in my life to cut that person from my life cause I had another girlfriend (2, in fact), step in and play the role of my Matron/Maid of Honour. And I couldn't have asked for a better pair! ^_^

View Quoted Comment

Maybe it's because that person is too smart to listen to any type of "groupthink..."

Yes I did , 6 months before my upcoming wedding in April. Luckily my cousin has accepted the role and I couldn't be more happier. There was plenty of drama leading to it and at this point I wanted positive vibes going into the last lap of planning.

View Quoted Comment

I certainly never dreamed about a fairytale wedding at all when I was younger. I don't even want that now. Some people don't sit there and think about their perfect wedding all their lives.

Do you know who I go to for support and opinions on my wedding? My FI, you know since it's also his wedding.

My bridal party has their own lives and I'm not going to bog them down with ridiculous conversations they don't care about.

I think I have an advantage, being a first time bride at 51. LOL No need for anyone's validation or support.

All of this drama, ladies....it's just not healthy for you!!

I understand where youre coming from. You just need another girls opinion but cutting her was a bit harsh. The only thing a moh should be planning is your bachelorette party. Helping you make decisions is your fh job. And if hes not big on details try asking your fmil or your mom.

View Quoted Comment Like like like

To answer your question, no I haven't and wouldn't ever let my MOH go. I also couldn't ever imagine uninviting him. He is MOH because he is one of my closest, dearest friends. I am sorry that wasn't the case for you. Perhaps this could be a lesson about how wine doesn't make the best of decisions, and I say that with the utmost sincerity.
While it is true that some comments on this forum can be derisive, did you honestly expect anything different from a post that stated "I fired and uninvited my MOH because she supported me in her way, not the way I wanted"? And while there may be a ton more going on to "justify" your decisions, you purposesfully did not give that information. It is almost as if you wanted posters to react the way they did. It sounds like the posters gave you what you wanted your MOH to give, honest opinions that did not just tell you, "do what you want", which may be what you were looking for all along.
If you and this other person are able to maintain a friendship after this, you will definitely be in the minority of how things like this shake out. Best of luck to you both.

Lol wow she dodged a bullet sounds like. Sounds like it would be so much fun to be in your wedding party. Not

View Quoted Comment

Congratulations...and WELL SAID. Sometimes it's just better to cut people from your life...for every door that closes another one opens. Good luck in your upcoming marriage!!!

Umm you realize it IS YOUR wedding and whilebits ok to get input it's not anyone's job to help you besides you FH. ITS NOT A JOB!!!!

View Quoted Comment Yes, exactly....I dreamed about it maybe for 5 min when I was 7.

See I was a MOH who was uninvited to a wedding because she was being a bridezilla and we said something to her about it. She was mad that we weren't okay with dishing out $600 each just for her bachelorette party, not including the dresses and whatnot, when she complained her whole trip, and said we did a terrible job planning it. She lost all 4 bridesmaids after that

View Quoted Comment

This isn't true for all little girls. And as children, we grow up and realize that not all fantasies come true. Expecting showers, luncheons, bachelorette parties, fittings, etc. is unreasonable. Being an adult means working, families, etc. and on average, I barely get to see the friends I want to on a regular basis. I am not going to let someone else's wedding take over my life and the little free time I have. I wouldn't expect that from anyone else. The expectations you just set out are unreasonable and unfair.

Also, I think anyone who removes a BM from their party should be prepared for there to be bad feelings and should accept that the bad feelings are their own fault.

If there is more to this story, please share because I'm having a hard time understanding what she did wrong.

She's right in saying, "It's your wedding, do it your way." My BMs and MOH have said this to me and I take it as them being supportive. What exactly were you expecting her to help you with that your FI couldn't? Bridal shower and bachelorette stuff, if they are throwing those, are all up to your BMs to decide. Anything else is for you and FI to plan.

Wow! Well, good to know there's more to the story, but what you did seems so harsh (given that you didn't tell us the whole story). I helped my sister and best friend as best I could when I was their MOH, but they didn't expect me to help out as much as it sounds like you expected your MOH to help out. Same goes for my sister, who is my MOH.

It's your wedding and you and your FH should be planning and making decisions

Sweetie don't listen to the negativity here. I would be lost without my MOH. She has been wonderful from the beginning. As soon as I told her I was engaged she made a shared pintrest so we can show each other ideas since she's out of state. She calms me down and levels me when I go crazy. Some brides need that. In like you, I need that. You should find someone who works for what you need. If others don't, that's great but don't let them say you went overboard. ITS YOUR WEDDING. Find someone who work's with what you need!!!

View Quoted Comment

Original Poster is long gone.....so:

LOL!

The friendship you guys have is a little confusing but I am not having any expectations from my bridal party. I've noticed sometimes people think it's your day and don't want to impose their idea. You also have to make your friend feel welcomed to share ideas but not forced to. I don't know - I prefer to plan with my fiance' and even if she did "help" out you probably would not have liked her ideas. But the point is, if you realize it was a mistake then it is what it is now. Just move on from it and try not to get too overclouded by one day.

I'm not sure what you're looking for here? No one is going to think this is ok. She is a friend, not an assistant. You get one day.