Is it wrong to not have a rehearsal dinner?

Maybe you could just have everyone meet at your venue and do a run through of your day just to be sure that you have everyone in place. Instead of having a dinner persay maybe you can go to SAMs club or costco and get a few cheese and cracker trays along with a sandwhich tray and punch. Just a little snack to get them through the night?

I don't think you have to have a dinner and especially for all your OOT guests. I'm in the same boat. 95% of our guests are flying in for the wedding. It would have been a whole other wedding. So we're doing family and wedding party (which is still a lot), heavy appeitizers and beer and wine 2 hours. Ideally, I'd like a backyard BBQ for everyone, but we're not staying in a house. Typically FH's side is suppose to pay for RD, but that's becoming old fashion I think. Is his side helping out at all? Maybe they could spare a few bucks for some things Alissa N. mentioned above?

A rehearsal dinner is not traditionally for the guests. It's just to eat after the rehearsal. We are having one, and the only people invited are the people directly involved in the wedding itself: BP, parents, siblings, pastor. Most guests don't expect to be invited to the rehearsal.

Also, traditionally, the groom's parents foot the bill of the RD. But if not, and you want one, it's not on your parents. You are grown adults who should be able to host one if you want, with your own money, if it is that important to you. Edit: Sorry that was a little harsh. We are paying for everything ourselves, and anything anyone offers is just a bonus, and was never expected from us by any means.

Most of our guests are OOT as well. We are having rehearsal in the morning, followed by a lunch with just the wedding party at an Italian restaurant we like. (We got a great price at the restaurant, though we had to call about a dozen places to find something that was in budget and could work with our party.) After that we are meeting our OOT guests downtown and taking them on one of the tourist boats in town for a tour (we live in Annapolis which is on the Bay). I called the tour company and told them what we were doing and how many people and they gave us a great price as well. We won't have the boat to ourselves or anything, but I think our guests will appreciate the "Welcome to Annapolis" tour boat experience. I think you don't have to invite everyone to the rehearsal dinner AND if you want to include OOT guests, do something local and cheap in your area that doesn't involve you paying for food or drinks. Good luck!

Long story short, no it's not wrong. I'm not doing one. I'm trying to save as much money as I can, since both FH and are are paying for it ourselves entirely. They're not necessary, to me, at least. I went to a wedding this past summer and was in the BP and she didn't have one either. We just went over how to walk and when to walk prior to. Saves money & time.

Don't have a rehearsal, and then you don't need a rehearsal dinner either. RD is also for WP only. Some people extend an invitation to OOT guests, but that's not required.

But if you require people to take time out of their day to rehearse, then provide a meal for them. Pizza and soda is fine in this case.

If you ask people to get together and rehearse, IMO you should provide a meal if it's mealtime or a snack if it's not mealtime. Doesn't have to be expensive but IMO it's something that needs to be automatically included in the budget, no matter who's paying.

And it's honestly a really nice time to spend with the people involved in the ceremony. On wedding day, you're pulled in so many different directions, it can be really easy not to spend much time with those people who are probably your closest friends!

We rented a party room at Portillos, which is a super casual hot dog/italian beef joint in Chicago. It was nothing fancy, but it was a great time. We used the time to hang out, thank people, and give out parent/WP gifts.

I agree that if you have a rehearsal, then you need a rehearsal dinner.. and it does not have to be expensive. Our wedding is OOT for everyone, including FH and I, so we rented a hotel banquet room ($80) and are ordering pizza, salad, and breadsticks (prob ~$200) and then picking up a few drinks.. very inexpensive and casual. I definitely want a rehearsal, because I think I'd go insane without one.. and I want the time with immediate family and BP (we will have 26 people I think at the rehearsal) to give out gifts and whatnot!

We are doing our rehersal and then just going out to dinner. Those that want to join us can but we are all paying for ourselves. Everyone seemed OK with this.

I was wondering if just going out and having everyone pay for themselves was ok. Thanks rebecca. I was only going to invite the wedding party and close family. Thanks for allyour input!

I was actually thinking the same question you asked since my BM's are my BF & daughter & FH's groomsmen are his brother & my 3 boys. But FH's sister in law & brother have volunteered to host & pay for rehearsal dinner as a wedding gift to us. I personally don't see anything wrong in not having one or asking everyone to go out afterwards & pay for themselves. My opinion is family & friends aren't going to think oh we didn't get fed, or at least I wouldn't.

We are having rehearsal then coming back to our house and having dinner at our house for the WP mostly and a very few others, we are just having pizza and stuff to go around it plus the groom's cake since I know we don't need another cake beside our wedding cake at the reception

You don't need to do this for your guests.

It is nice to do it for the people that HAVE to be at the rehersal (though I personally don't even think the rehersal is necessary)

We just fed our bp pizza and beer and no one bitched, it was one less meal they had to buy.

The way I look at it is a wedding is like a play, the cast only comes to the dress rehersal and they you have a little cast party, and get the real thing done the next day. Just cause someone is invited to the play doesn't mean they get free access to the dress rehersal or cast party

Our rehearsal dinner is wedding party only. I suggested skipping the dinner and everyone freaked (everyone being my parents and FH).

I think if you are having a rehearsal you should feed the people that come to it. Doesn't have to be anything speciall - if your budget is tight just order pizza.

Can I have late afternoon rehearsal cocktail in lieu of a rehearsal dinner?