I asked my friend to be maid of honor and she said no

So sorry she said no. There could be a lot of reasons why she doesn't want to be MOH though. Maybe she can't afford the extra expenses, doesn't have time to plan all of the parties, etc. Don't take it personally. She IS your friend, I'm sure she's not saying no because of you.
Is there another girl you can ask to be MOH?

Has she ever been a MOH before? There's a lot that goes into it. They are like unofficial wedding planners. Maybe she was aware of the craziness that she will need to go through that day and doesn't feel as if she could be there for you 100% like you need.

Not giving a reason is a little odd, if she's a close enough friend to ask then it seems like she would be close enough to tell you the real reason behind her decision. Is she just not into girly stuff or has she recently gone through a break up?

Everything happens for a reason and maybe the MOH you do have will be outstanding and God just had to make room to get her in that position.

Wish you the best!

She makes plentyof money and parties all the time so I know she has time and money. My mom suggested that she might be nonsupportive because she's afraid of losing me but I think she's just trying to make me feel better.

Right now I'm not excited about planning anymore. She took the wind out of my sails.

I agree with PP, there are tons of reasons she could have said no, personal, financial etc. I know it's an honor, but it truly is a strain financially and emotionally sometimes. Maybe she is just not up for it? Maybe she has fears of being "on stage" in front of people? please don't take it personally, like Brian said maybe you could talk about it at some point in the future, but don't be accusatory, as if she did something wrong - she had a right to say no and the reasons are obviously strong enough for her to disappoint a good friend, I'm sure she didn't take it lightly.

Don't try to figure out why, because you'll drive yourself crazy. just because she has money and parties all the time doesn't mean she doesn't have a valid reason (to her) why she said no. I'm sure it hurts, but now onto finding someone to be your MOH who wants to be. don't let this affect your friendship, she can still be there with you threw the whole planning/wedding stage just not as your MOH.

But everyone knows I asked her and she said no. I can't ask anyone else now because they'll know they were second choice and will say 'no'.

I guess she has her reasons and maybe I'm being dramatic but I feel like she's screwed up any chance for me to ask anyone else. I'm going to be standing up there all alone.

Is she going to be a bridesmaid already? Or has she said no to being in the wedding completely?

Breath it will be fine. there may be a host of reasons why inculding the stress level that goes with me a MOH. friends will understand that you asked another friend first those in your wedding party should be the ones who love you and dont care!

She may have said no because your wedding is like 10 months away. Alot can happen in 10 months. Heck! Alot can happen in THREE months! Case in point, I was a MOH for a now ex-friend's wedding and quite frankly while I appreciated the honor the bride was the most self-centered bratty thing during her engagement and after the wedding. 3 months after her wedding, I called to tell her that I was engaged and she was mad as a hornet's nest because we got engaged too close to her wedding date, (didn't realize your wedding was a weekend long event) had my date set, dress picked (my own), venue, and had an idea of the BM dresses. She expected me to start over and plan a wedding that was more "convenient" for her. Now, she wonders why no one told her that my husband and I are expecting a son as well as another friend sharing she was pregnant with a surprise due any day.

It hurts to have people say no or not be supportive of your big day. If you ask me, big events like this-CONT-

Show you who your real friends and family are and you should be grateful for them!

I agree with others, don't let it bug you! She could have been caught off guard when you spoke with her and felt obligated to give an answer at that moment, instead of having time to think about it. She could have something big starting in her life that is unrelated to your wedding but she anticipates she won't have the time to dedicate to your day. She could be shy in front of a room full of people and not want to be an attendant.

And sure, she may appear to party and have money, but that might be a misinterpretation. I'm sure we all know someone who we look at and say "I wish I knew their secret, I want x, y, z that they have." And when it comes down to it, appearances are deceiving. Ex: a friend of mine from college inherited a condo on South Beach, where she now lives. Her great aunt owned it for 20-30 years, and this friend doesn't have to pay a dime to live where she does. But she doesn't tell anybody that, so people think she earns a fortune.

There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with not having a bridal party. My husband and I didn't. He doesn't have close friends and I had a few more than I would have liked to included. I decided to eliminate the drama and not have an offical bridal party. My sister was my unofficial MOH. She helped me with everything. We didn't have anyone stand up with us. Honestly, I wouldn't of had it any other way.

Don't take it personally. So what if she doesn't want to be your MOH? Not everyone likes being put in the spotlight (no matter the size of the spotlight). Move on, find someone else.

It's okay, it's better she told you now then waited till you were closer to the wedding date. She had her reasons and she is perhaps very uncomfortable with the reason why not. Or if she has been a MOH before, perhaps she had a very negative experience, I know I was a bit leary on accepting another MOH position after my one friend spent her whole wedding planning process crying because she was afraid of leaving home, not to mention the bi^^* moves she made about everything ... and all the demands she made on me and then I was the MOH again in another friend's wedding and it was the most pleasent experience ever.

BrianC. You don't know me or my friends so you don't know if I'm making assumptions. We all grew up together so if one person says no, no one else is going to step up.

Thank you everyone else for your support. I love the opinions and support here!

My fiance has already asked and has 3 of his friends that will stand with him. Right now I have no one.

Maybe just have bridesmaids and don't have a MOH. I didn't. I just had two good friends as bridesmaids and my husband didn't choose a Best Man. Sorry she did that.....I know how that can take the wind out of your sails...don't worry, though...it'll come back....

I have declined to be a MOH before. To me it is not an honor, but a chore and an inconvenience. I make decent money and love my friend who asked too. Honestly, I was not willing to give up a year of MY life to plan HER wedding. It probably would have hurt the friendship if I went through with it. Intstead I paid for a DOC for her and went as a guest.

Don't be offended by her decline. Maybe her decision is about her and not you.

BTW I am having only BMs and no MOH. You don't have to have one.

Jill, don't rag on Brian C because he's asking you to look at things from a different angle. I often find myself assuming the financial situation of my friends; however I remind myself that I don't truly know whether they're "rich" or not. Just because someone parties a lot or whatever, doesn't mean they have money.

As others have said, being MOH isn't always an easy task. It can be expensive, exauhsting and time consuming. Not every female wants to deal with that. I was only BM in my MOH's wedding and I can tell you that I was so thankful when the day was over. She is the nicest girl in the world and made things very easy for us but damn, it was still a lot of work and expensive.

I'm with, Amy W, on this one. As much of an honor it is to be asked, it's also a position that shouldn't be taken lightly, and accepted with knowledge and understanding of what the position entails. With all the ladies on here that post threads complaining about the lack of involvement their MOH shows, you should really look on the brighter side. Have you asked her why she didn't want to do it?

I have a question? WHere does it state that being a MOH is such a huge job/responsiblity. My sister is my MOH and also has a very demanding job, is a single parent and is in school. I dont want her to stop her life for my wedding. As the time approves her role will be to help me a bit but I dont understand brides who ask so much of their bridal party. Getting married is a blessed event and friends and family should feel honored not labored with duties and tasks even if they want to do them after a while it will get old. I think whomever you ask to stand with you should know what the position means to you not what is everyone expects it to be. Maybe she got scared off being everyone turns it into this huge job.