Heavy Hor D'Oeuvres instead of Buffet/Dinner plates

Michele - i think it was this comment that gave me the impression that you didn't care.

"We are paying for everything ourselves so I don't care how our guest feel about it!"

Like I said you have plenty of food on the list, so just give them a heads up on the website.

Just venting didn't mean it literally...I think our guest well people that are close and important to us understand how expensive weddings are and think the food will be plenty..those who do not then oh well..I guess the I dont care part comes in when I think abt someone getting "MAD" because they weren't satisified..really?? I've been to plenty of weddings where I was disappointed in the food but I never got "MAD" I just ate again when I left..I mean so what its not that serious to me..so when I made the comment abt not caring how they feel it was directed to that!! If its to the point were you are mad, then you are at my wedding for the wrong reason..only my opinion!

I want people to leave my wedding happy, full, and satisfied! I want EVERYONE to have a great time!! But reality is, we can't please EVERYONE....

Wow! You asked for opinions and then go off on those who voice them?

Honestly, I would be upset, as a guest, if the invitation stated dinner and the real food was an appetizer frenzy. Some of your guests risk going hungry. If you do not care, oh well, they were your friends, not ours.

Dinner is actually more after you add in 20% gratuity and 6% sales tax...I did the calulations..we are actually coming out around $2000 cheaper..Dinner plates are $30 each...Hor odeuvres you pay per tray larger trays feed up to 150 we will have 11 different trays...plus the carving/action stations...everyone is not going to eat everything..I will have a whole separate meal planned for kids..

Michele, I was doing the hd's like you. just fyi... my caterer gave me a price list with how much served what. By the time I figured it out, it was cheaper to have a buffet, with hd's for the cocktail hour.

I didn't have a plate charge though. It was included in my rental of the ballroom.

Then Kathy if you would be UPSET then u have issues..that wouldnt bother me..I wld eat what i could and keep it moving! thats jst me

My 10 year HS reunion was heavy hour devour or however the fark it is spelled. While the food was good, it wasn't quite enough to feel satisfied. I've also been to a wedding reception where it was heavy HD's. Again, wasn't quite satisified. I love appetizers but not as a main meal.

@Michele G, I do not have the issues. I do think that you do, but that is your problem darlin'.

Go with your ideas. You asked for opinions, you received them, and you and not happy with them. You have lashed out at those who seem to disagree with your idea. So, the person with the issues, well, is you.

Best wishes.

@Micehle G, I do not have the issues. I do think that you do, but that is your problem darlin'.

Go with your ideas. You asked for opinions, you received them, and you and not happy with them. You have lashed out at those who seem to disagree with your idea. So, the person with the issues, well, is you.

Best wishes.

Normally I would think heavy HDs would be a pretty good idea but if I was invited to a wedding and it said there would be a dinner, I would want a dinner. However, you know your guests best so I'm sure you'll do whatever is best for you and your guests.

LOL alright ladies have a good night!

I just think its funny that people said they would be upset, mad, or whatever! I can offer dinner and people still not be satisfied...and I have the right to lash out if I am told I have an attitude and don't care abt my guest you can have an opinion on what I should do but if you judge me as a person I am going to lash out..and I did it in a nice way!

To quote you: "Do you think our guest with be upset if dinner is not served?"

We answered your question based on our opinion. You ASKED us for our opinion so we gave it. 'Nuff said.

I'm the one who said people might leave early if they were expecting dinner and were hungry. My family and I left my husbands NEPHEW'S wedding because by the time we got to the buffet all the food was gone. We hadn't eaten since breakfast, the wedding started late and then it took another 45 minutes to get to the empty buffet. Our blood sugar was dropping, the kids were cranky and we were starving! If you've paid attention to any of the posts about weddings one of the biggest complaints people have is there not being enough food. Hors D'oeuvres would be fine IF THEY WERE NOT EXPECTING DINNER. If you want to change it that's your prerogative but obviously you had your mind made up already so what was the point of posting? All we are saying is to make sure your guests know they WON'T be getting dinner (AT DINNER TIME).

I got that, what pissed me off is the statement below it was just rude! I know that they are my guest thats why I am putting all this time and energy into it When I said I didn't care I didnt mean it literally I was just venting!! ...Bottom line is no matter what we do..we cannot please everyone..but thanks for your views..gn

Remember you are hosting the reception as a thank you to your guests for attending the wedding - so you can't really have the attitude of you don't care about your guests, they are YOUR guests.

@michelle sounds like your nephew should have passed out hor odeuvres so you all wouldnt have been waiting to get to the buffet line..ummm so buffet will not be an option for us I wouldnt want my guest to experience that.. The wait staff will be walking around wth trays and guest will have the choice of going to a station..kids will be served dinner plates...so i guess i DO have it all figured out! Thanks for all of your opinions!

Every wedding I've ever been to that said on the invite dinner would be provided, I've intentionally NOT eaten all day before hand. As a guest (and as someone who's been the bride before) I recognize how much it costs to feed people at your reception, and how much effort is put in, and I don't want to be wasteful/unappreciative by not eating. So if I skip breakfast and lunch specifically cause I expect a nice dinner at the reception, and then it's just snack food, yeah I'm going to leave early. And probably be a bit offended too.

So to answer your question:

"Do you think our guest with be upset if dinner is not served?"

If I were a guest, yes I would be upset with you and think you're either cheap or dishonest.

"I'm just afraid we won't have enough food."

If you told them dinner and you're changing your mind to snacks, you won't. The end.

Call me crazy but I'm not seeing the problem with what Sharon said. You asked people what they thought, they responded with honest answers from a guest perspective and you attacked them. What you didn't post was that right before she said that she also told you Hors D'oevres were fine just make sure to post an update for your guests online or something. Instead of taking that for constructive advice you have managed to find the only semi-negative thing and blow it completely out of proportion. Don't ask for opinions or advice if you don't want to hear them.

Thank you for your opinions and I apologize if I took offense to what any of you said...I shouldnt have taken offense I dont even know any of you...good luck on you marriages!