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Champion August 2017

Fired bridesmaid

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Mrsbdg, on March 20, 2018 at 8:35 AM

Hey all!

This morning my cousin decided to "terminate" me as one of her bridesmaids. I was already sort of pressured into agreeing to be a bridesmaid in the first place because she is a favorite in the family.

Towards the end of the call she mentioned that she would still be "okay" if my DH and I came but that I was "banned" from wearing the $400 BM dress I literally just got 🙄

So:
If you've been "fired" would you still attend (there would be significant family drama for skipping out)?

As a "fired" BM would you go out and get another gown foresaking your recently purchased dress? (It's super simple black sweetheart spaghetti strap full a-line/bordering on ball gown)

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168 Comments

Just Said Yes June 2019
Kelsey · on March 20, 2018 at 9:51 PM
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So rude! I would skip.
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Dedicated July 2018
Karen · on March 20, 2018 at 9:53 PM
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I would work out like I never have before, pluck those hairs, buy a HOT floor length red dress and big bling earrings, get my hair professionally done, put on super high heals, and walk into the wedding and have the time of my life while posing in as many photos as possible.
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VIP August 2018
Shai · on March 20, 2018 at 9:54 PM
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😂😂😂 Exactly!!! You the type if person I would come with. 🤣 👯‍♀️ Looking like every bit of that $400. Smiling from ear to ear like it’s my wedding. I be there like hey wassup hello
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VIP December 2018
Ashley · on March 20, 2018 at 9:54 PM
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You already know from previous threads that I’m not exactly queen of etiquette, but I’m petty and would wear the hell out of that dress, or not go. I’d be pissed. Or be an even worse person and RSVP yes and not go. Like the worst cardinal sin ever.
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Savvy June 2019
Megan · on March 20, 2018 at 10:00 PM
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I'd definitely have her reimburse you for the dress and keep it! That is so unbelievably rude of her especially since you already bought the Dress. I wouldn't go to the wedding at all.
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Devoted September 2018
Kim · on March 20, 2018 at 10:30 PM
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Wow, at least he has some couth! That's very nice that he reached out.
Go, look smashing, eat and drink and have a blast. And I would tell anyone who asked why you were no longer in the wedding party the reason: "it's this damn mustache! I would have really detracted from her big day".
PS. You look lovely in your profile pic!
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Savvy May 2018
MayBride2018 · on March 20, 2018 at 10:37 PM
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Dont go sounds like she does not want you there.
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Expert June 2018
Mrs.Henderson2b · on March 20, 2018 at 10:41 PM
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Right!! Shining bright like a diamond! 💁🏽‍♀️Hey girl heeeyyyy 😂😂
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Expert May 2018
Mrs. Danihel · on March 20, 2018 at 11:13 PM
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Wow, this is a horrible situation. I am so sorry your going though this. It was very nice of her FH to message you, and for that reason I would probably attending. However, as for the dress, me being the person I am, I would totally wear it. The alterations you can do sounds like that would change the dress pretty dramatically and be very beautiful, but how much more are you really wanting to spend on an already pretty expensive dress?
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Master March 2018
Orchids · on March 20, 2018 at 11:23 PM
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I'm absolutely blown away. Thank goodness her FH has a shred of humanity. I have no advice, I'm still reeling from your dad's words here.

Are these "family" members really work trying to keep peace with?! I would have no trouble breaking ties with ANYONE who treated me that way, ESPECIALLY family.
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Champion August 2017
Mrsbdg · on March 20, 2018 at 11:27 PM
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Omg I love you both so much! I may grab some of my killer jewelry from before my career change and rock my altered gown.
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Champion August 2017
Mrsbdg · on March 20, 2018 at 11:32 PM
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Yes my dad is a very outspoken person.

Yeah i only see this extended of family a few times a year so it's worth it to see my grandma without a bunch of drama...she's our glue. If I fought with them they'd try to poison her against us (she's dealing with Alzheimer's rn so she's much more cognitive pliable than her younger day) and I love her so much. I'll just grit my tweet with my family.
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Expert June 2018
Mrs.Henderson2b · on March 20, 2018 at 11:46 PM
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I would!! 😂😂❤️
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Devoted July 2018
RH912 · on March 20, 2018 at 11:56 PM
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I'm feeling the same way. It's petty but would feel so satisfying.
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Devoted July 2018
RH912 · on March 21, 2018 at 12:01 AM
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Wow....standing ovation for creativity. Love it
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Super June 2019
Eamsee · on March 21, 2018 at 12:51 AM
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I'm sorry, but that is completely messed up. I may be old fashioned in my thinking, but to me the people in your bridal party are those that mean the most to you. The people that have been there for you through thick and thin, have been your support system, and who have watched you and your SO grow together as a couple. To "fire" someone is such a slap in the face and the fact that you are family is even more of an insult. To terminate you because of your look is just the cherry on top. She seems like a selfish brat. You choose your ladies because of who they are, not how they look. I couldn't care less if the ladies in my bridal party showed up with purple hair and mohawks, as long as they were there to share one of the most important days of my life. Sorry to hear of the ridiculous drama you're going through. I also would insist on being reimbursed for the $400. Whether you like the dress and could possibly wear it to another event in the future or not is besides the point. That's a decent chunk of change that you wouldn't have spent if she hadn't told you to.
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Super October 2018
Tammy · on March 21, 2018 at 10:03 AM
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Whoa whoa whoa.... she picked out a $400 Bridesmaids dress? That's insane!!!
If I spent $400 on a dress I'm wearing it I don't care what she says!
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Savvy October 2018
George · on March 21, 2018 at 10:21 AM
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I typically would say just skip the event and call it a day. Given the issue behind this firing, I say you go to a store get a wild sparkle belt and wear a black veil and shock the pants off of her. what is she going to do to you? fire you from attending her wedding?
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VIP June 2019
Danielle K · on March 21, 2018 at 3:33 PM
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I would not go. If I did go I would not wear the dress in fear I would match the wedding party. I would try to return the dress and if that's not possible I would send the bride a bill. I would actually be very serious in getting my money back for that dress.
As far as not skipping for fear of family drama, I have actually skipped a few very important wedding and even a baby shower for which I drove my sister to but did not go in my self, here lately. I was certain there would be drama but I just said I had to work or was tired from working and literally no one cared. That being said all of my family knows my job/how much I work and those are very valid excuses, but just saying its possible no one will care if you aren't there.
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VIP June 2019
Danielle K · on March 21, 2018 at 3:46 PM
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So I just took the time to read the comment and now I'm feeling salty on your behalf. I would bring a bill for the dress in a congratulations card (a crappy one) I also love the idea of wearing the dress with the glasses/mustache disguise lol be petty because it sounds like this (edited for ww's sake) deserves it!
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