Cash bar

@ littlebean - I'm from New England too (love seeing other New Englanders on here!). I honestly didn't know that cash bars were a no no until I came to WW. Pretty much every wedding I've been to were cash bar. I've never been to a wedding that had an open bar, only limited wine; if we wanted anything other than wine we had to pay (which has never bothered me).

I feel like even if you are doing a cash bar you should try to provide SOMETHING for free. As the users from the UK mentioned, they also provided welcome drinks etc. So even if you have a cash bar, include as much for drinks as you can, whether it be welcome drinks or wine or a fully hosted cocktail hour.

I think people are using "from Boston" and "from the Boston area" very loosely. I was raised about 15 minutes from Boston and I have never, not once, been to a cash bar wedding. It's not a "Boston" thing and it's not a New England thing. It's a cheap thing.

ETA: Others said it more tactfully than I did - yes, it's a social circle thing.

To add another region, I've never heard about cash bars before coming to the US (I'm from Switzerland). I haven't been to many weddings here yet, but I know the next one I'm gonna go to is beer and wine plus cash bar for liquor. I sort of get it, but I wish they would have just stuck with wine and beer (Ours will be wine and beer only too btw, but that' mainly because our venue is managed by a park that does not allow hard liquor).

I'm from Burlington, MA. my family is from Maine and FW family is from Boston. We both have never been to an open bar wedding and neither have our families. Its definitely about social circles. I never find it rude. It is what it is.

@CB I know I would rather pay for the drink I want than be flat out denied my drink preference

I wouldn't go to a cash bar wedding LOL

Nastassia, I don't understand your comment. If you didn't know what all of the options meant, why didn't you ask or look it up?

My wedding will be the first ive been to with an open bar. Cash bars are the done thing in Ireland , never open bars. Maybe that's cause the Irish drink too much lol

I'm guessing providing beer + wine + liquor for only a few hours is equally tacky? I guess I'd never really thought about it before I got engaged a couple of months ago.

I'm originally from Boston, but live in NYC now. Every wedding I've been to in both areas has had at least a limited open bar (beer and wine) or a full open bar. We are doing a full open bar in NJ for our wedding.

I'm in ct, my wedding will be the first open bar I've been too.

I am picky. If I had the option to buy exactly what I'd like, rather than your keg of beer or cheap wine, I'd be fine with that.

Fair enough... I would hope that people would care though.

@kacie I am in Lowell so you are super close. I've literally never heard of it.

Of

Course attending and hosting open bar would be ideal... But I didn't know that some people feel so strongly about it.

To say someone wouldn't attend a wedding if they weren't providing you free booze is tackier and more rude than having a cash bar IMO, is the free booze more important than celebrating the couple? Not to me...

I definitely think it's a social circle (and possibly age) thing. I have never been to a wedding with an open bar, I've been to one that had open wine and beer, and all other ones I've been to were cash or dry. I'm in North Texas, so it's not like we have an issue with drinking here. Most of the weddings I've been to were from people in their mid-late 20s though, so the age of a social circle could also play a factor.

I have never been to a wedding with an open bar. That would be awesome, just never have I seen one. Either way I'm not offended I could care less. Until this forum I had no clue it was such a no no. We are having partially open bar but that's it. Our venue doesn't even allow hard booze. I'm in Minnesota. Cash bars are the norm for us here, or at least any wedding my friends or family have ever been to.

I live outside of Boston now but have been to more weddings outside of this region. The two weddings I've been to in Boston were open bar. My family from Mass is all pro open bar, no one thinks cash bar is a good idea.

I'm from Illinois. Of all the weddings I have been to, only one has been cash bar, and we STILL talk about it, even though they are already divorced and both remarried to other people! And I went to one wedding in Wisconsin that was beer/wine only, and I thought that was weird and cheap. Everything else has been like this:

Open cocktail hour - everything: liquor cocktails, wine, beer,

Bar closed during dinner (people stock up before dinner)

Unlimited table wine during dinner (usually a cheap white zinfandel)

Bar re-opens the minute the bride's plate is cleared and stays open until 15 minutes before reception is over

I have been to many weddings, some cash bar, some just a tab limit of 500 dollars, but most were open bar everything. I live near Albany and my wedding will be open bar for everything. It's completely up to the bride and groom. I honestly never minded either way. Stick to what is in your budget! Having open bar beer, wine and soda is a nice compromise if you are not sure and will be a little cheaper than full open bar.

I have lived in, have friends in, and have gone to weddings in New Jersey, Wisconsin, Illinois, and Arizona, and I've never seen a cash bar.