Bachelor party at a strip club. Opinions?

It's about loyalty, & relationship boundaries. I'm Wiccan, but raised in a christian home, & I wholeheartedly believe that if FH is truly with me 100%, for the long haul, he doesnt need to look at other women. Just like that bible verse, which for me not being christian, I think is a great verse. My man is with ME, so he should be looking at ME. Men are visual, well I've got a full naked bod right here for him to enjoy. I've done xxx pix for him. I love wearing lingere for him. Point is, if he is truly satisfied with me, there's no reason for him to need other forms of entertainment... Not only that, but he is MARRYING ME, so why does he need that last hooorah anyway? He stopped being single the day he put that ring on my finger, some would say since the day they started dating.

This is not pointed at anyone in general, just my general observance of other people in the world, judging. But people REALLY need to stop judging. You have no idea what has happened in someone's relationships, you have no idea who's wronged who or what boundaries they have. So automatically assuming there's some jealousy or trust issues, you are wrong. Each relationship has boundaries, if they're werent everyone would technically not be exclusive. Monogamy itself is a boundary, a rule: be with me & only me.... No one has the right to judge or assume about someone else's relationship just because it's different.

Also, I consider myself to have very strong morals. I'm even vegan out of respect for the earth & her creatures. But in a past relationship I put myself in a situation where I crossed a line... I know how easy it is to do it. I obviously felt horrible after but never told a soul. One thing I learned is that people make mistakes & not putting yourself in those situations is half the battle.

Eta : spelling

I don’t want him to but I think he might end up going. My feelings are if I’m not good enough for him then he should go find someone else. Ill dance for him he can pay me if that’s what he wants to do. The plus side is me getting to finish the job!

AMEN Dloves! lol

I could never be vegan tho. I congrat you for sticking to that.

Nafina - I understand your view point and respect it. My relationship is different so I don't see the strip club as disrespect. But honest question, not trying to start anything promise , what about movies with nudity? Would you consider that disrespectful if he watches it. I'm just curious.

I don't think my husband looking at other naked women online or in person means I'm not good enough for him. I think he just likes boobies.

Just like I still enjoy looking at other hot men. My husband is still more than good enough for me.

His only rule is he isn't allowed to touch any girls back lol. I know they aren't allowed to in strip clubs but if they hire a private stripper who knows what rules there are. I have never been one to care about strip clubs or porn or any of that.

Future_Lobos - no I dont b/c that's hollywood, & I see men too. I mean, I went to see Magic Mike. Ended up thinking it was stupid. Movies are something we both see, but we dont lust after those actors, esp since most likely, we will never meet them. A strip club, those nude bodies are right in your face.

But specifically strip club for bachelor party - that's the "guy thing" isnt it? I'm not doing escorts for mine. Matter of fact, after I saw MM, FH was actually mortified that girls see that in the clubs. he doesnt want me anywhere near that. So I respect it. Why do I need some guys jock in my face? Why does FH need a vag in his? It's the same thing...

I'm not saying that FH is blinded, I mean there could be some half nude chick walking down the street. It's the fact of our particular problems, & the connections to emotions & bad memories that they carry, led our relationship to have certain boundaries.

Future_Lobos - My morals, along with FH, are the same with the strip clubs as they are with nudity in movies. Whatever causes lust, should be avoided if possible. Movies and strip clubs are easy to avoid so it's not too much of an issue. So, no R-rated movies for us. That also goes for me though - no Magic Mike in my future.. hahaha. :-)

Lacey: I would have to disagree with the R rated movies... I mean it's hollywood, everyone knows that sex & violence sells. But you seriously dont see ANY R rated movies? And partial nudity isnt just R rated. Titanic has that sex scene, covered up, but it's quite obvious. I draw the line at porn, straight up xxx, but hollywood movies, you'll never meet those people. Your FH is ok with that? Good for you if you have that good of a man (seriously no judgment) because I highly doubt most men would let a woman tell them they can or cant go see a movie.

We're both going to strip clubs for our respective parties. I love boobs, he loves clowning around with his friends, everyone wins. Our boundaries for the parties are the same as the boundaries for our relationship, so I'm cool with it.

They creep us both out. Not sure if his friends would make him go... Either way if doesn't bother me because I know it's not his thing.

My FH went to a baseball game and then a strip club. I was completely fine with the strip club because I have never seen him go to one, and it's not that big of a deal. Now he did go to one, a full nude one (gross in my opinion) and then came home to tell me all the details. Gross. That is where I got mad, and said I don't care that you went to a strip club, but save the details for someone else.

Makes sense...real life vs. pretend. I agree with the guys in your face...I've actually been to a male strip club once (drag club turned into male strip club after)...I HATED it! FH is good enough for me.

First of all, I also have to say that no, not all straight men like strip clubs. My fiance is kind of grossed out by them and feels very uncomfortable going. And we're very open about stuff like this (i.e., I know he watches porn, I know he finds other women attractive and we ogle the same hotties, etc.), so no, he's not lying to me.

Anyway, he isn't planning on going to one, but we both know he and his friends could end up there. I'm not a huge fan of the idea, but it doesn't hugely bother me either. No lap dances though... sorry, not allowed. And I agree with what Jules said way back on page 1 -- the strippers aren't allowed to come to you. I would be livid if they hired a stripper to come to the hotel and he knows it.

Nafina - I have NEVER watched an R-Rated movie - my parents were strict growing up and I feel I have lost nothing by not watching them. FH used to before we started dating and then we had some serious talks about the whole topic. He's alright with it because honestly, he knows it makes me uncomfortable and he loves me. It's a religious choice for us also. Now it's both second nature for us to check ratings before we see most movies. He's a very good man.

AMy: I"VE never seen those either lol.....

Lacey: good for you then. While I might not agree, I love to see that I'm not the only one that has boundaries that are stricter/different than what the rest of the world expects. It's hard to live in this world where people, society in general, have a specific outlook on how you should be. When you go against that, you get called controlling, or tight assed, or a bitch.

This whole topic is so weird to me.

It makes me thankful that me and my hunni don't have as many "issues" as I thought...

Maybe I won't yell at him for leaving his socks on the floor tonight...

If society wasn't so prudish, men would understand that breasts are for feeding a baby and the potato is to push the baby out. Our bodies are incredibly well designed and we should be proud. Instead we act like it's something naughty and men get curious because the bodies are always covered up. It's really not their fault. But yeah let the poor lad go to the strip joint.