When to ask your bridal party to be in your wedding?

Do what you want to. I asked right away after I got engaged. But our wedding was only going to be year off. So you could wait a little bit since you are going to have a bit of time. It really is more up to you. You don't have to wait to have a venue or anything like that.

We got engaged this past May and set a dated of Oct. 2012. We asked our wedding party almost right away. There's no doubt who we want so why not? If you aren't sure, then I'd wait. We also had an engagement party July of this year and we wanted the BM's and GM's known :o)

I became engaged the day before Thanksgiving 2010. Our wedding is Spring 2012. I've only asked one BM and my MOH. We're still working out the exact number of attendants, might have 2 or 3 more BMs. Once that is decided, I will ask them.

Well I agree with the other girls you can ask when you want. But then again it's two years away. (Surprised people haven't said really? but the world ends a year before your wedding! Back to subject.)

Alot can change in two years. Maybe your BFF is who you want for a MOH then next summer (Knock on wood) you two have a falling out that's permanent and then you may risk the chance of someone being hurt for being second-best (some girls I know are sensitive like this).

I say leave it up to you but be sure it's a party that's built to last!

I agree with the others. I would say wait until closer to the time. We became engaged and I asked everyone right away. We set up our plans and website, etc. We are getting married in April and I just found out that two bridesmaids and one groomsman cant make it.

I think it would have been easier to make a list of who you want in your wedding party along with backups. Then when you are sending out your save-the dates you can start asking. This way it is closer to the wedding and everyone may have a better idea of what is going on in their life at the time.

I think ask a year in advance.

I asked about a month or two after the engagement bc I just couldnt wait any longer! We got engaged March 2010 and will be married Oct 2011. The girls I asked are my two sisters, and my 3 childhood best friends whom I know I will always be best friends with so I wasn't worried about us losing our friendship. I'd say if you have a friend you love right now but can forsee them possibly doing something to tick you off, then I'd hold off on asking them until closer to your wedding. But if you have long-term friends you've known forever and they're like sisters, ask as soon as you want!

Please Please Please wait! If I could do it all over again I would have waited maybe even until now. After you announce youre engaged people are really excited its new and great news. But as things die down, you will start to notice who is really on board to help. You will also start to notice who really will do best in each position in your wedding. Sometimes your best friend shouldnt be your maid of honor. Better to find that out from observation than disappointment and hurt feelings.

I would wait unless you know for sure exactly who you want and truly believe that they will still be a part of your life in the years to come. mine is 15 months away and have only asked two people one who is a close cousin of mine. i dont have hardley any female friends though and thos ethat i do i have i havent gotten that close with since i havent known them very long so the next 5 months or so will be when i decide because i want my BP to be made up of people i am close to and will be friends with even after the wedding

I wouldn't ask more than a year in advance. Maybe even like 10 months. I suppose if you're 100% that you want your sister to be your MOH, that's one thing, but asking your whole wedding party really early is potentially setting yourself up for drama. You may not be close to the same people or closer to others. People move, relationships change, we make new friends,etc. And you don't want to put yourself in the situation where you want to un-invite people or they need to back out.

We had a long engagement and I didn't ask people til we were about a 14 months off. Not that you don't have true friends, but a lot of things can happen in 3 years. There are people I was super close with 3 years ago that I am not close with anymore.

I got engaged October 5, 2010 and I asked my bridesmaids the next day! We are getting Married March 2012 - so it was a year and a half away when I asked them, now the groomsmen - we have not asked yet, I think FH wants to wait a litle while on that - which is fine with me, that's his choice!

But I would say if you know those are the girls you want by your side, then do it, but if you have even 1 insecurity about it, I would wait!

We asked at the same time we told them that we were engaged. However, the only ones we were asking were my son and my daughter. We figured the likelihood of having a falling out with them was pretty minimal. ;-)

However, in other situations, I would recommend not asking anyone at least until you have a good idea of how involved your want them to be, and how much work would be required. The biggest source of wedding drama seems to arise from the MOH or BM who thinks her job is just to show up on the day, and the bride who thinks the MOH and BMs should get involved with DIY projects, meet with vendors, throw a shower and a bachelorette, etc. You really need to be able to discuss what you want when you ask, so that the person does not accept unless she is willing to do the work.

This is up to you as the other ladies said. Me, personally, I'm 11months away, been engaged for a year now, we have out bridal party set already, we know who we want and we know everyone will say yes, but we are still waiting. The plan is to announce everything in May (7months from wedding date) during a get together for my b-day. Ask them that same night or take them out to dinner the next week to ask. Every wedding I've been to, I've always been ask to be in the BP between 3-6 months before the wedding date. I personally do not see the point of asking people to make such a commitment more than a year, a lot can and will happen 2-3 years from now

Thank you ladies for all your suggestions and input! It has been such an exciting journey already and the idea of asking my BM's & MOH to be in the wedding is even more exciting. You all have made some excellent points! In fact, I've already had some unexplained issues with my bestfriend; I've seen her true colors. Also, the majority of my wedding party is already chosen. I have my step-sisters in it,there's 2 of them and then my FH has two sisters but I happily want them in the wedding because we are close and then I was going to have my brothers girl in it who I get along with well. I think I've already eliminated my best friend and have decided to go the family only route with the bridal party to keep it simple and drama free!

@September 2011--I was thinking that a few weeks after getting engaged! I was talking to my co-worker and said "Well that sucks, I'll be paying all this money and my wedding date will be a few months around the corner before the world ends!!" So wrong! lol

I was engaged in May 2010, didn't ask anyone till July 2010 ... but I also have very fortunate circumstances, my bms are my hs friends (yes we've been out 8 years this June) and we are still as tight as we were in hs and as everyone got engaged, we promised each other unless a major issue came up, we would be each other bms and I am the 2nd to last one to be married so it has worked out nicely for us plus my other 2 bms were family, I was pretty sure there wouldn't be a huge falling out ... LOL

Ditto Natalie D.

I'd wait a while. I asked too soon and regreted it (just 1 person).

I would wait as long as you can. I thought I was sure but I regretted it and had to un-ask someone. It was awful.