My sister refuses to wear Proper Wedding Attire

Faith clearly thinks she's royalty.

Dame Edna maybe.

No wait. I love Dame Edna

Eek. I'm going to try to be nice here, OP, so bear with me.

I have this thing with my body that a lot of people see as indecent. I can put on a box and suddenly people think I look like a hooker. They're called curves. I have big boobs. Decently cut tops are no longer "decent" on me, by conservative standards. That's just the deal. And to say I'm dressing like a hooker because I'm busty is unfair and quite frankly, slut shaming. And if I did want to "look like a hooker" that's my choice. You can't dictate what your sister wears, or anyone else for that matter. If she's confident in her body and wants to wear a bodycon dress let her.

Sorry, but you're totally out of line here.

ETA: Also "special little jobs" is BS. Don't make them do something instead of giving you a gift. Don't expect a gift. Don't make them work your wedding. Have you ever seen the Sex In The City episode where Miranda is the "Guest Book Attendant"? Yeah. It's a BS job.

MayBride:

I didn't say that the venue having a issue with the sisters clothing would certainly happen, but I am wondering what suggestions anyone has if it was to happen. That was the question. Yes the situation I laid out is hypothetical as it was meant to be.

I would hope a venue wouldn't want to hold a bride responsible for such things but I wouldn't want to bet on them not doing so. Whether the venue has rules on attire or not, if someone is dressed in a way that when they bend over it looks like a porn shot it could be a issue. Having a plan in place on what to do if the sister goes too far in her outfit may not be a bad idea.

OP: you didn't mention if the venue has a dress code, but your wedding day wouldn't be the time to find out there was one 'in the fine print'. Most are probably right, that it's likely that the eye rolling will be directed at your sister and not you.

What do you mean by "hold the bride responsible?" Is there some sort of short skirt fine that the bride is going to have to pay for her sister's attire? Even if the venue has a dress code, all that would happen is they ask her sister to leave.

The fuck are you talking about StitchingBride? Hold her responsible? Goes too far? Do you think the cops show up and arrest for indecent exposure over some cleavage?

Katie90 mostly I mean if someone gets on their high horse about the sisters attire and wants the bride to so something about it. Personally, I can't say I've seen it happen so much at weddings but have when Ms. president of the church board doesn't like something so they want said person's relative to get the person to leave.

The OP has mentioned being embarrassed by sister before, but I'm wondering if it's as simple as that. Wondering if she's been put in bad positions or been held in some way responsible for her sisters behavior.

StitchingBride, she has said that the wedding is not taking place in a church but in a venue decorated to LOOK like a church. The president of the church board or whatever has really no power there.

@stiching how would a Bride know what any guest is wearing until she's walking down the aisle. And then what is she going to do? Check them in the middle of the wedding. Let's be real.

Now I'm just confused. Legal coverage is not a thing and nor do brides get "held responsible" if a guest isn't dressed up to the venue's standards. The worst that would happen is that the sister would be asked to leave. I highly doubt the venue director will be walking up to the bride/OP on her wedding day demanding that her sister cover up or be "held responsible," whatever that means.

LMac: I'm asking does anyone have any suggestions on what the bride can be prepared to do or say in the event that someone does come to her upset about her sister.

I didn't say that it would be reasonable for anyone to hold the bride responsible for what her sister does, but something doesn't have to be reasonable or make sense to happen. I've seen situations where someone's relative was upsetting someone for whatever reason, then they go to the more reasonable member of the family wanted them to deal with it.

What I'm wondering is, if someone was to get upset about the sister, then come to the bride expecting her to get the sister to leave, deal with her, whatever - does anyone have suggestions on what would be the best way to respond or handle it?

So as I'm reading through other posts just now I also found this from OP.

https://www.weddingwire.com/wedding-forums/any-ideas-for-an-inexpensive-wedding/ef894a26e267fdad.html

Where she says that she's asking her guest, instead of gifts, to buy their own dinner at her reception.

::deep sigh::

Carlyle- Holy shit. I can't even with that.

@StitchingBride: if someone came up to me and told me my sister or SIL was dressed inappropriately (which could happen - they certainly dress to the beat of their own drum) I would tell them that I cannot control what other people wear or do, and if they are so upset they should approach that person themselves.

I don't have time for drama at my wedding, so I won't partake in something so silly.

StitchingBride, I go to a church where the dress is very conservative. If someone came up to me the morning of my wedding complaining about how somebody was dressed, I would tell them to go mind their own business.

OK wait so according to that comment, the wedding is a court house wedding. Why do you need to tell anyone to wear a formal gown to the court house for a wedding?

And in regards to asking them to pay for their own dinner, they won't tell you they don't like the idea. They'll talk amongst themselves. Trust me. I had to pay for my own dinner at my FH's best friend's "reception" which was, like yours, a restaurant meal after a lovely court house ceremony, but unlike yours, nobody was given any special duties or needed their attire approved. We all still talk about it and it's been almost 3 years.

And another thing, if they are being asked to pay for their own meal, why do you need a B-list?

None of this makes any sense. Either you are the tackiest person alive or you are making all this shit up to see if anyone is paying attention to you.

I'm really hoping OP is a troll after reading all her comments on other threads. This can't possibly be a real person.

slut shaming her sister

B-list guests that will have to pay for their own food

Got proposed to OVER THE PHONE after 3rd date

W.T.F.

What. The. Fuck. Is 'legal coverage"?

Nipper and boobs aren't genitalia. As long as her short and curlies and exposed whatever. If she wants to let them sway hither and thither so be it. But she has ever right to take her shirt off same as any man. It's a nipple not the antichrist. Who cares. It's literally fat. With a nipple on it.

Get. Over. It.

I want the OP to come back and respond to all of this. Will we ever hear from her again? Come back Faith!

I hate to admit it, but now I feel like a private investigator while I kill the last hour of work.

https://www.weddingwire.com/wedding-forums/will-guests-feel-pressured-if/8673aad54a696be3.html

"I will be addressing our invites & adding the tag "& guest", which doesn't mean it has to be a date.

I will also be adding small handwritten notes to further explain the invitations intent.

I've some friends that won't travel alone, but will make the trip if they can bring a friend....

We are budgeting accordingly & if some don't bring a guest, it's ok, cause I'm sure that a few uninvited people will appear...and if not, there will be extra food left for someone to have another helping...!!"

Either she's completely changed her wedding that quickly or I'm thinking the troll theory may actually be the case.

ETA for clarity: How are you asking people to pay for their meal in one thread and then saying you'll have extra food in another?

It sounds like she's having two weddings.

Wedding number 1: courthouse with dinner (guests have to pay for themselves)

Wedding number 2: religious ceremony on first anniversary with buffet reception.

I'm just confused about which one has the dress code and b-listing.