My **NEW** husband is not invited to my sister's wedding - 2 months after ours!!

I am so very sorry you are going through this. I agree with everyone else that you should stand up for yourself and you FH. I think mrsD.'s response is a great one.

I definitely wouldn't go. The occasion of marriage means that your husband is the most important person/relationship in your life. I actually did not attend a wedding last month because I was invited and FH wasn't. We didn't make a big deal out of it, just sent them a congratulations card and left it. Unfortunately for you it probably will not be this simple, since it's family instead of college friends, but you can still say that you and your husband go (or stay) together.

I wouldn't go. I am not that close to my sister and i think if I had to jump through hoops and not get to be with my husband and watch her be with hers. No I wouldn't give her that. Even if it is her day. Now this may mean she won't go to yours.

There is no way in the world that I would go if my husband wasn't invited. I pretty much see it as if you don't invite him then you didn't invite me and it's rude to him for me to even make an appearance. I would purposely go on vacation somewhere else at the time of her wedding so there would be no question that I'm refusing to participate in such foolery. Her FH should be upset his siblings aren't invited. There shouldn't even be a wedding at that point

I say no go if the hubby doesn't get to come! Plain and simple!

It seems apparent from this thread that this is they way she operates and your parents have always taken the approach of giving in to her and letting her have her way because it is easier than dealing with the fallout. That is why you were made out to be the bad guy.

Please stay strong in your resolve to not attend if your FH isn't invite. When it comes to things like this, he ranks way over your sister and needs to be your first priority.

She CHOSE to make her wedding very small and is excluding a lot of important people. I am trying to figure out why her FI is treating his family this way and wonder if it is because it is easier than dealing with her.

This isn't so hard hun. Once you get married your hubby is your family. So the choice is yours. Go to a wedding where your spouse is not invited to or stay with your spouse, site see FL && make memories that'll last a life time w/your better half. I'm engaged and all of my friends && fam know we're a packaged deal. Invite both or invite none simple.

Show her the correct way to do it. Invite her and her fiance to your wedding.

If she still does not invite your hubby, decline the invitation.

Well I sent her a note back and did let her know that she's really offended FH and me, and that since she decided to have a small wedding, there are potential consequences for that. I wouldn't see rescind her invite - that'd be rude....though I don't know how she could show her face at my weddi.g without feeling some shame.

Well see what happens!

I always try to put myself in other people’s shoes in certain situations…

How would she feel if you told her “Due to financial limitations, you cannot bring your fiancé to our wedding.” And see how she feels. I'm sure she'll get a hint.

So self-centered! So very sorry =(

I would be very understanding if there were financial limitations...I know how expensive weddings are! however, knowing that my parents have given her money for the wedding, it's not because of that. Because it's not of financial reasons it's that much worse!

I don't know if this will make you feel better, but my sister got married 1 day shy of 3 weeks PRIOR to my wedding. She's also been married before, this is my first. We planned our Wedding for the last 2 years, her's in 2 weeks.

I'd probably avoid that fiasco at all costs. Send a check and be done with it.

I just read the entire post and want to first say, I'd decline. I agree with so many others about how ridiculous your sister is being and how also giving in will only make it worse with your family down the line.

I also want to let you know that I'm in a similar situation. My oldest brother and his wife have absolutely NO respect for anyone but themselves and are constantly able to get away with their poor attitudes because nobody expects better from them. It is exhausting but honestly, it is easier for me to essentially cut them out of my life quietly. If they reach out to me, I'll see them. I don't ignore them if we are at a family function together, but I'm not going to entertain their selfish personalities.

I think its extremely rude of her to do that to you. Especially when you'll be on your honeymoon and must cut into it for the purpose of going to her wedding. Plus, not to mention your new husband will be alone for soo long while you would be at the wedding, for what looks like the whole day just about. Even though she's your sis I wouldn't go, it just seems very rude to do something like that. And "YES" he is family now, which she has seemed to forget.

I would decline as well. If you give in to her now it just starts a trend that will continue. We are talking about your husband not a boyfriend of a few months. I agree with D no husband no me!

@Koch bride - sorry to hear you've gone through something like this too. But it seems you've put it in a good place I've been trying to do the same and I just get stuck knowing how disappointed my mother would be.

BUT, good news! After showing my mom this thread, she actually started to see this from a whole new perspective (I don't know if it was the thread, or something else, but things are changing). She's finally admitted that she does think it's wrong that my FH isn't invited, but just didn't want to get involved with my sister and tell her her real opinion (as you can imagine my sister acts like a full grown toddler). I know my mother isn't right, but the fact that she's starting to admit to herself that she handled this in the wrong way is a big step! She's okay that I'm not going to the wedding and admits that my sister is digging herself a hole with our family and her FH's. It looks like I'm done with this, but my mom's now stuck trying to figure out how to finally be honest with my sister and try and save this wedding/family...if that's possible (I'm pretty skeptical). Either way, I'm out and drama free!! hopefully.

Thank you Ladies and Gents!

Be strong! Stand up for yourself and don't give in to family demands unless your sister agrees to include your husband in the wedding invite.

And I would advise that when it is your turn, to do the gracious thing and invite both your sister and her fiancée to your wedding. Show them, and the rest of your family, how to be gracious and classy. They might not get the message, but others in your family's circle of friends will. However, I really hope your sister is not in your wedding party. You don't need that kind of stress on your special day. If you have selected her as MOH or a BM, for your own sake, I would rescind that particular offer, and tell her that she is no longer needed in that capacity.

I'm late to the game and know you already have your decision but my first thought was to un-invite your sister's FH from your wedding and tell her she can't come with him lol. Of course I would never really do that but it's a funny thought

She was originally going to be a bridesmaid but I changed that over a month ago given other drama she was causing! It's too bad...they don't have any friends to invite and it will end up just being parents. all this negativity is not a good way to start a marriage!!