Jealous of FH's bachelor party and I feel so guilty about it =(

I'm not gonna lie, I'd be like you're not going there, it's a deal breaker. No way would I be comfortable with that. In my opinion a guys trip to Amsterdam should be done with single guys... Really single, like no girlfriends single.

You are totally in the right to say no way, not cool, stay in the US and be away for 4 days max.

All of these destination bachelorette / bachelor parties piss me off. That's what college spring break is for.

I would be jealous too.. :-/ no one likes to be jealous, but I would totally feel like it is not fair. When I met my FH, he already had 2 big trips planned. 1 to Spain with his brother - he went last winter. 2 to China with his grandmother this coming October. I don't really care about the one coming up since he is going with his grandmother lol. He told me he wouldn't plan any big trips unless I was coming with him. I don't think I could just be fine with my FH taking any other big trips in the future without me anyways. I understand a guys weekend, but not a guys out of country across the ocean week long trip.

I know those guys want to have fun, but can't they really find something closer?

Thank you, D! I told FH if he even asked to go we wouldn't be getting married. Obviously that's an exaggeration, but it's not even like Vegas where you can at least pretend its about gambling or drinking. :/

Oh lawdy. They are in for a treat. Talk about party party party

I went a few years ago and I had the time of my life, my bridesmaid actually just got back from there and said she saw people having sex on elevators daily and that hostels or whatever were nuts too. There isn't just *weed* legal there. Its pretty much everything. If I were you I'd totally wanna go with. But if you trust him it should all be fine honestly. Let him know the boundaries, but also remember they are guys and will do whatever they want regardless.

@D that's exactly what MOH said! They're acting like they're all "single" and having this ridiculous "boys" trip. After talking to you ladies and my MOH even my bro in law (sisters husband), I don't feel so bad about speaking up about it.

@SoontobeMrs, wow that sounds intense, lol.

Throw all his clothes out of the suitcase and hid in there. Then, once you're safely in their hotel room, go exploring!

My FH has spend a month in Australia (with the navy, but he still was there.) I would love to see Australia! I always wanted to. I'm expecting some great stories. "So... tell me about the sunsets there" haha

Maybe you two could go there on your 1st anniversary.

Lol well this whole situation is getting blown up between the guys vs. girls We're all very close because I'm pretty good friends with all the other groomsmen's gf's and they're equally pissed. Actually my MOH is fuming pissed. It just seems like such a big trip to take without consulting your significant other about it. I know the guys are going to sit around and bitch about us or do whatever guys do. I haven't even had the chance to bring up to FH because he is working late tonight. Wish me luck girls. I think this is going to be a guys vs. girls thing. I bet if us girls said we were going to Europe to party it up as our last single shebang, they would flip a lid. I'm actually getting more mad about it but I guess I should give FH a chance before I jump down his throat. I need to calm down. I went from zero-60 as soon as i heard they are actually trying to do this thing for real. Bastards, lol.

I know it's the one groomsman who is the whole ring leader of this ridiculous charade

Try to stay calm when talking to FH about it. He may not even want to go & will be relieved to have you as an ally. A lot of guys get super nervous about their bachelor parties but pretend like they can't wait. Groomsmen usually just try to embarrass the groom the whole time. Guys are so weird. Bottom line, once he hears how uncomfortable the idea is making his future wife, he should drop it no question.

I would be extremely jealous too.

But I'd be more concerned with why my FH would think it's ok to take this big trip without me and wondered if he'd feel guilty that he's there and I'm here. And I would definitely be calling up the ring leaders of this event and ask why they would think this is a good idea and it's disrespectful to me and my relationship with fh. I would make it clear that they can have their bach party in amsterdam but I am coming too and he better be brought back to our hotel room safe and sound and hopefully not so sickenly hung over.

I'm also wondering if his friends or the ring leader is secretly jealous that he is getting married. Or secretly doesn't want him married. Once a friend ina group gets married, then life changes and the dynamic changes. I've seen jealous guy friends totally take out men for their last hurrah hoping they screw up so they don't get married and can keep the single band of brotherhood going. Selfish and crazy I know but I've seen it with males and females.