Is it bad that I do not want to follow up with people who do not RSVP?

I can see how that's frustrating for sure- But I suppose the greater risk you run is that they end up coming to your wedding anyway and then you have a bigger problem on your hands. As annoying as it may seem to have to track down those guests who have not responded, I would say your peace of mind is worth it in the end.

Sorry to hear it's played out that way! Hopefully it all works itself out for you in the end!

I'm dreading that too. It's hard enough to track down addresses in the first place! I'm praying people are good about RSVPing. I guess mail just isn't something people do much anymore, and most don't realize how hard it is to plan and how much time, effort, stress, and money are involved. It really is annoying to have to pay for stamps and RSVPs that are ignored though, isn't it!?

Here's a link where a fellow WW bride posted why you SHOULD call and check.

https://www.weddingwire.com/wedding-forums/why-you-should-call-and-check-in-on-your-rsvps/73fd5e38629be0a3.html

Ultimately, it's up to you, but it would be pretty embarrassing for ALL parties involved if they show up, and you have no place for them to sit and no food for them to eat because of what could be an honest mistake.

I think it is so rude when people don't send their official RSVPs, BUT... you don't want to deal with the mess of them showing up when you expected they wouldn't or vice versa. So I think you have to suck it up and get in touch with them.

I didn't want to call either but I did. The ones that didn't bother were a no anyways but it's so much better to find out their official answer rather than assume. (I put stamps on ours too) We had a bunch that did not bother to send it back which really irritated me but some people are like that now..

Having thrown larger-type parties over the past 10 years or more, I can tell you most people don't RSVP. Some don't even know what it means!

I agree with the ladies. You are only shooting yourself in the foot if you don't track down these people you haven't heard from. If they show up, they will want a chair and some food. =)

We had a lot of people fail in their guest responsibility of rsvping to our wedding. I still have 20 people I expect to never hear from again...very sad. However, I also had 3 invitations get lost in the mail. All of those guests got save the dates. They all planned on attending. I also over invited, which ended up not being an issue, most people rsvd no thru some channel or another.

Follow up, it is frustrating and annoying but necessary.

While it may be annoying, it's your responsibilty to your vendors to get them a proper head count. Also, you have to remember that the post office isn't perfect either. You may be waiting for RSVP's from people who never go their invitation in the first place, or who sent in their RSVP's but it got lost in the mail. Whether you want ot or not, you need to call and ask. If they give you the run around, then you can politely say that you have to have a final head count and you are going to have to count them as not coming, so atleast they know. Atleast the website here makes it easy for you to go in and put yes or no for people after you've made the calls.

Not sure if anyone's mentioned it yet, but I remember Kris mentioned a bunch of her invitations went to Postal Service Purgatory -- you should call to make sure your invites even got to them, and to give them the benefit of the doubt. What if they mailed them but they also got lost? Like others mentioned, better to know they aren't coming (or let them know, sorry, deadline passed, so you'll miss them) so you don't have people showing up you weren't expecting.

Thank you Aretina for posting that link. I missed it he first time around and I am one of those brides who felt like if I put on the RSVP that failure to do so constituted a "no" reply and as such excludes you from the final count, so I would have been assumign w/o thinking about the instances that someone might have done exactly what they should have but through no fault of their own, the RSVP still was not received and so would have left them out. BOT THE END RESULT OF THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN EMBARRASSING!

I am now convinced that whether I want to or not, I will have to follow up. Thanks to the OP of that thread as well.

Just want to say NO. I feel the same way. (But, I'll call them all anyway..)

I also don't want to deal with the people who RSVPed wrong. I received an RSVP for Mr. & Mrs. John Smith, Joe (they have a 2 yo.)

Then they put "2" in the blank. Um... you have 3 names above! So FH has to call and ask.

I also got back an RSVP with Mr. & Mrs John Smith with a "check mark" and no number. They have 4 children (FH's cousins), and I can't imagine why they wouldn't come. So FH has to call them too. Grrrr..

Thanks girls. I guess I will end up calling. :/