Is a Honeymoon fund really THAT BAD? Geez.

If I want to give you cash I will. I don't need to be told that cash is an acceptable gift. With your small registry people will get the hint you want money.

Its not that bad. In using one and people think its cool.

Yes, it's tacky. People will give cash at weddings without you registering for it. Plus those sites take a percentage of the money your guests give. Have a small registry with upgrades, you'll still get plenty of cash.

ETA: spelling

Yep, it is tacky to ask for money. Especially through a website that takes a percentage of it. Oy.

Uh yeah. Save up for your honeymoon or don't go on one right away.

It's seen as an extremely tacky thing to do. If people want to give you money, then they will and asking for it for your honeymoon might put them off. If you can afford a honeymoon then pay for it yourself. But just think about this, why would you put $20,000 down for your wedding when you can easily have payed for a simpler wedding and honeymoon no problem. The idea of "well I put money down for this giant party so people should contribute to my honeymoon" is absolutely disgusting. But if you are dead set on asking people to help fund your honeymoon then just do it.

"We can afford a honeymoon, but after spending $20,000 on a giant party for family and friends to eat and drink on our dime, a little help would be nice."

That is the mentality I will not support. You host a party because you can and want to. Not because you want something in exchange.

My fiancé and I have a Honeyfund and I've had so many people say how much they love the idea! They really liked being able to give us a special experience for the honeymoon, like a spa treatment or an excursion. The bottom line is- it's your wedding- do what you want to do!!

Lol "because they love us" because if my parents don't give me money they obviously don't love me.

Per Etiquette asking for cash is tacky - and as others have said, a small registry will clue people in that Cash is the way to go.

But my real problem with them is (and I don't know if Zola does this or not but I would assume so) is that they take a cut of the "gift" people give you. They aren't paying for dinner on a beach, they are paying for 95% of that dinner.

People have pushed me to do this and once I tell them that the site host takes a cut of the gifted money, those same people are usually appalled. If I'm giving cash (which I always do) I am writing a check. Whether I'm giving you $50 or $250 I want to know you got each cent of my hard earned money.

I give cash because it's easier like the people before said. I wouldn't give to a honey fund because it doesn't feel as personal.

Sites like Honeyfund take a portion of the money your guests gift to you. They also send you a check at the end, so you're not actually obligated to do the experiences your guests think they're giving you. And most of the time you get the money after when you would need to pay for your honeymoon, so you'll need to have saved up enough anyway.

As a guest, I would rather have all my money go directly towards the couple, and not some third party site. I think guests know how to give money, and you don't need some cutesy way of getting it out of them (while ripping them off with the transaction fee of those honeyfund sites).

Asking people for money is rude. It is common sense. JS

I think having a small registry is a great way to get cash gifts. People will get the idea without having to go to a honey fund site where a percentage of the gift gets lost.

What would be the deeper reasoning? Yes it's rude and tacky.

Don't give me that "we already live together" crap, I've lived with my FH for about 6 years and we need new EVERYTHING. I was so excited to register for updated, matching household items.

I couldn't afford a honeymoon, so I didn't go on one. It's a vacation. Not going on a honeymoon doesn't make you less married than couples who have been on one, and it's not something you deserve just because you got married.

I would never ask people to pay for a vacation at all, especially since it is something I am not entitled to and I know that not everyone can afford to go on one, but the fact that you admit that you can afford it but expect people to give you "a little help" because you chose to have an expensive wedding is unbelievable.

I'm honestly not against money going towards "excursions" or experiences like what Christine mentioned. My FBIL had things like a Cinderella carriage ride and a special dinner at a certain Disney hotel on their registry. But I also know that most people just bought cards and put cash in them for their wedding. And I did the same because just sending money electronically felt so emotionless and meaningless. It felt like I was paying a bill...that's where I think it gets tacky...

ETA- I didn't know that you just get a check from the money that goes towards the excursions on registries...they weren't going on my registry anyway so I hadn't known about that. Thanks Awkwardtobe! Definitely makes them even less appealing and okay with me now...

It's easier for people who want to give you cash to just do it at the wedding. There are no service fees when they give you a card on your wedding day. And they can give you as much as they want without you telling them how much to give.

Ya'll the nastiness is really unnecessary. We're all brides here, about to celebrate our big day. KatieJade, I'm not implying your parents don't love you because they don't give money. I was saying that as a disclaimer, meaning we can afford a wedding and a honeymoon, but they simply want to help as well. I've had a great reception to the idea of adding honeymoon activities, etc. to the registry, and honestly it wasn't until I joined this site that I saw such strong opinions against it. Not trying to make a "shit-stirring" post, I just genuinely wanted to know why people are up in such arms about it.

Look, we all know weddings are effing expensive. But to put each other down for trying to save a dollar as "you shouldn't be having a wedding in the first place" is just simply mean. That said, I do agree about the percentage fee, and the idea that it can seem impersonal. That's a good point and I hadn't thought about that.

Finally, I don't believe I am owed a gift if people attend my wedding. I honestly don't care. But would I rather open boxes of blenders that I have to return, or just have cash? My answer is the latter, and I'm just finding ways to make it easier on everyone.

Unpopular opinion, I personally don't think they're tacky. I'm not going to have one but I wouldn't be appalled if someone had one. I might even contribute to one, or give cash toward the honeymoon or something else. I like the idea of helping the new couple go on their honeymoon just as much as I'd like to know they were getting use out of my physical gift.