In lieu of shower wording

Https://www.pinterest.com/pin/115123334198542442/

This is what I would give...crocheted rock cozy. And the rock!

For all of you saying "she can plan however she wants!!" Yes. She can. But why come to an Etiquette Forum to ask the best way to be rude and tacky? If you're going to beg for money, just stand on the side of the road with a damn sign. No one is entitled to gifts of any kind, just because they're getting married.

It's not an etiquette forum but a wedding forum. She can vent all she wants.

But she will get opinions

There is no way to politely word an invite for this. You are not inviting them to anything. If you are just semdingncards to ask people to give them money instead of attending a shoeer, that is extremely rude. Either they register for actual gifts and someone throws them a wedding shower. Or they don't register for anything and skip the shower. If they don't register, people will most likely bring cash or checks as a gift to the wedding. They can use that money however they want.

OH LORD. The reason there is no good wording for this is because it is BEYOND RUDE. Don't put up with your daughter's foolishness!

I think that if she would leather have money contribute money toward a honey moon she should mention it do the word gets out. But she should also except those gifts from people who would rather purchase. There are sites for those who would like to receive money for a honeymoon

Barbara, those sites charge a fee. If I am inclined to write a check, I want the receiver to get the whole amount.

They're not HAVING a shower. That is what 'in lieu of' means.

We aren't going to entertain you even under the gauzy premise of a party.

Just give us cash.

And what a fine example to set for your daughter.

Yikes these comments. There should not be a shower invite with this wording, agreed with others that is very rude.

Having that said, I believe your daughter could post something on her wedding website about "in lieu of gifts, please donate to our honey moon fund at blah blah blah". Generally, people like to give wedding gifts and will go onto the bride and grooms site to see if they are registered anywhere.

Brittney, yikes to your comment.

"please donate to our honey moon fund?" BLORP

My suggestion? Don't do it. Her honeymoon is not a charity. People shouldn't feel like they have to donate to them. A honeymoon is a luxury, not a necessity, and it's so inconsiderate and entitled to expect your guests to pay for it for you. Why don't they try saving up more before their wedding? Or postponing the honeymoon until they can afford it themselves? It is not her guests responsibility to pay for their vacation.

Ugh

You are having trouble coming up with suggestions to ask people for money because it's rude. Wedding showers are to shower the bride with GIFTS. If our daughter is not having a wedding shower, then she is out of luck. Really think about what you are asking. This is such a presumptuous idea that someone should give your daughter money for her honeymoon.

No I should have explained. She & her fiancé do have a honeymoon fund set up. That's where she would like to request potential invitees would be contributing to.

It's still rude.

This is the only comment I have for this...

Sorry, OP. Still rude.

The potential invitees to what? You said "in lieu of shower."

"Please contribute to the couples honeymoon fund, located here (link), even if you might not be able to afford a vacation yourself."

It's not a donation and it's not a fund.

Get real.