How do you start planning your wedding

Congratulations on the engagement! Wedding planning can be so much fun, once you figure out the major details! We started with our guest list. That is going to determine the size of venue you need as well as a large portion of your budget (price per person for catering, the amount of tables and chairs you will need, the number of centerpieces for each table, if you will be doing guest favors, how many you will need, etc.). You will also want to determine what budget you feel comfortable with, and what portion of the budget you want to dedicate to each item (ie, venue, food/bar, flowers, decor, attire, etc.). Next, I would research and tour venues that can hold the amount of guests you plan to invite and that are within the amount of budget you have allotted for it. Some people choose the venue first, then base their color palette, decor and the “vibe” of their wedding based on what works with a venue. We did the opposite. We chose the vibe and formality first, then chose a venue that worked with our vision. When you tour venues, make sure you ask what all is included/provided. For instance, do they provide tables and chairs, linens, plateware and silverware? The more that is included at your venue, the less things you have to worry about! I would also make sure to ask them if you can use any caterer you wish, if they have certain caterers they require you to use, or if they provide in-house catering. Once those major tasks are completed, then you can move onto the fun stuff like flowers, decor, and dress shopping!

1. Figure out what type of wedding you want (elope, microwedding, big wedding, destination, backyard, chapel, etc)

2. Set a budget - discuss with your FH on wedding finances

3. Pick a venue

4. Pick a date (may go hand in hand with available date for venue)

5. Use wedding wire's checklist

Additional tips and notes:
-Real flowers are expensive. You can opt into fake ones. I used fake ones from Ling's moments on Amazon.
-Photographers and videographers are pricey so if you can only do one then I HIGHLY recommend the photographer
-Start looking for dresses now (bridal, bridesmaids, mothers, etc) - there may be a shortage next year because A LOT of people are getting married
-Make sure you understand what your expectations are for your bridesmaids (I advise to not expect much because their main role at the end of the day is to wear their dress and stand by your side day of, if they are able to help you and assist you then that's a bonus because they too have their own lives such as work, school, family, etc. aside from your wedding planning process)
-Be mindful on who is paying because once someone is going to pay then they have a say (out of courtesy)

Thank you so much Cece and Heather! This was super helpful🤍

We started with a rough guest list (you have to know how many so you pick the right size venue). Then, we picked a date. It didn’t seem real until we did. Once we had a date we started looking for all our vendors.

The very first thing is sit down with fiancé and decide on your vision. What 3-5 areas do you want to focus your money and attention on? Most couples go for the guest experience (good food, free drinks, great dj) and a great photographer for memories. You can cut out entirely anything you don’t care about. Decide what you are willing and able to spend without assistance because money always comes with strings. Either a loan you pay off indefinitely or someone else gets final say in your wedding. Decide how many guests you want to invite. Only those you can’t imagine the day without. Parents can host their friends another time and relatives can meet up for a family reunion picnic at another time.


You need all that information set in stone before you can look for a venue. Be aware that all inclusive venues are not intended for low budgets. They also are for couples want to be strictly hands off during planning. They have mandatory food/beverage minimums that are 5-6 figures alone and you don’t get to sample any catering before you sign the contract, which is a red flag for many.
A blank slate venue is best for a budget wedding. Parks department owned venues include tables/chairs/kitchen and you provide all vendors of your choice.
Once you have the venue booked, you can send save the dates via phone which cost nothing as has been done for decades. It gives guests a heads up to plan travel and schedule time off work, but once they are sent, you cannot revoke them without ending the friendship, same as with the actual invitations.

Congratulations on the engagement! We were engaged 1/1/2021 and are still in the middle of planning our October 2022 wedding, but here's what helped me get the ball rolling:

- I made a Pinterest Board specifically for the wedding. I'm a visual learner, so seeing pictures of things I liked helped me decide what style I was looking for.

-Set a budget. Can be a rough estimate at first, but definitely have a conversation with your partner about how much you're both willing to spend and how the wedding will be paid for.

-Once you know what kind of venue and *vibes* you're going for (beachy, garden, vintage, rustic, etc), I recommend looking for a venue as one of the first things you do. Even before setting a date, because a venue you love may not have your date available, but if you're flexible with dates, you may even be able to get a good deal. We fell in love with our venue, but went in with a few dates in mind. They had 2 out of 3 of our dates available, so we went with the latest one in the year (10/22)! Some venues are all inclusive, which means they provide some of the services and vendors you'll need (like food and/or drinks) so you'll want to book a venue first and then look for the other vendors you'll need.

Honestly, after booking our venue and setting a date, a lot of other things started falling into place because now we could work on setting a wedding day timeline, sending out Save the Dates, hiring other vendors and a lot of other details that wouldn't be as clear if we didn't have a location and date set. Happy planning!

These responses are so helpful thank you all!

We knew we were having a church wedding, so that part was already largely figured out when we got engaged. The first thing we did was draft a rough guest list (don’t be too hard on yourself about being thorough yet, just make your best guess-timate on who you’d likely invite) so we knew the size we were going for. If you’re doing a church wedding, you gotta nail that down first, and then I’d say your next step is hunting for venues. Once we set our date and chose our venue, 90% of our stress was gone (it helps that the venue is catering, so that’s one less big vendor to worry about)- I’d also work on finding a photographer soon!

Hi Nataly! You've gotten incredible advice so far, so I just wanted to add links to a few helpful articles!! 🌟

Just Got Engaged? The 8 Things You Need to Do First

How to Plan a Wedding Step by Step

7 Things Couples Should Agree on Before Wedding Planning

First off, congratulations 🥰🍾 second, the first thing we did was chose our date(which got switched around like 2 other times before solidifying) we already knew we wanted a beach wedding so we really didn’t have to decide the place lol but I recommend considering that along with the date. They kind of go hand in hand. I would have a back up date as well in case of covid or weather or unavailability 🥰 from there just work your way down the check list- colors, theme bridal party & guest list. Weddingwire and Google has been such a great help in all of my wedding planning so you’re in the right place 😇happy planning!❤️

You sound like me lol. Budget first. then start writing names down. from your side and his. Get a pinterest and/or tiktok and save and screenshot your likes or dislikes and then go from there and choose a planner. if not choose a venue and some venues come with a planner and go from there.