Gahhhh! receiving off-registry items: rant/needing advice

View Quoted Comment Yeah... Had a talk with my mom. Always a good plan.

View Quoted Comment Then they're not weddings.

View Quoted Comment

LOL! Go, MOM! Always a good plan.... You're going to be fine. It seems like you originally posted in the heat of the moment, but have come around to the critical points of the feedback you've received. Good for you!

View Quoted Comment

Yessss. Last time my mom said something about kids, I sent her a picture of my dog with Santa and said she already has a grandchild.

Yikes. This is Bridezilla-y. What do you do on holidays or birthdays when someone gets you something you didn’t ask for?! Wedding is no different. People put thought into the things they gift you. You can appreciate them or you can exchange them.

If someone explicitly requested (errr demanded really) to only buy presents for them off their special list I’d be mad and wouldn’t give them anything at all.

View Quoted Comment Exactly! Appreciate the perspectives, and ultimately I think it's been helpful to go off on this random sidetrack of the wedding/vow renewal discussion to discover that I've probably been confusing myself and others with the wrong terminology...

View Quoted Comment That's adorable. I tried to put Santa hats on my rats but they just ran away.

View Quoted Comment Yeah you're very right. I posted when I was just annoyed but feeling a lot more reasonable now. Thanks for the input. 🤗

My eighteenth birthday party didn't really live up to my standards; I think I'll have my real eighteenth birthday in a couple of weeks...

And, in this case, "wifezilla." She's not a bride.

You thank them and stop being a brat. They dont have to give you a present st all.

Definitely being a bridezilla, you aren't entitled to anything if anything someone putting special thought into something you didn't put on the registry makes it more special.

Clare, based on your responses, you seem to have learned from this post and have had a change of heart. To your credit, you take criticism VERY well. Sometimes we gain rthe right attitude by having the wrong one first! All the best to you and your husband. ❤

*the

Hate that you can't edit on your phone!

Although I feel like I too would be frustrated with this situation (which I'm sure will happen), there's really nothing you can or even should do.

Your wedding is supposed to be a happy moment in which you get to dedicate your life to the person you love with your entire being. It's not about the gifts you receive... and if it is all about the gifts, then maybe you're getting married for all the wrong reasons and to the wrong person.

Everyone receives gifts off their registry and more often than not, those gifts are horrendous, but you just have to deal. Hopefully they'll provide a good laugh to you and your SO after the wedding and hopefully you can exchange it for something you do want.... or sell it on Craigslist and get a little extra moola for something you'd like.

Maybe they don’t like ordering online from amazon and prefer to shop in store? Or maybe the gifts you picked were too expensive? Or maybe they are trying to personalize the gift for you (very sweet, sometimes a little frustrating)? People obviously put a lot of thought in the gift to be picking it themselves, so sugesst tojust say thank you and move on. I understand you want to registry items but you can always exchange, sell, etc. Saying anything like “only buy from our registry” sounds extremely ungrateful, no matter which way you spin it, so I wouldn’t.

View Quoted Comment You requested gifts for your college graduation?

View Quoted Comment It's sending mixed signals when you say you don't want gifts but then make two registries. Having two registries comes across as someone who very much wants gifts.

View Quoted Comment I was looking for a comment like this! Claire, you really did handle yourself very gracefully in the comments. Not everyone responds kindly on WW, but you never lashed out at anyone. I'm glad you understand that you were acting a bit like a bridezilla in your original post. It's okay to rant. I've said things before that later I realized "wow that was SUPER rude". No one is perfect and you've admitted your mistake. Enjoy your wedding celebration, it honestly doesn't matter to me if you've been married for two years or not lol.

View Quoted Comment But for her family, the current event she is planning represents the wedding. If she had a shindig and a registry two years ago, then had a registry now, that's one thing. Since there's only a registry now, I don't understand why people are making a big deal out of OP having a wedding celebration now. Who cares if she lived with her husband for 2 years? Lots of people live with their partners for YEARS before making that commitment official in the eyes of the government. To me wedding celebrations are when your friends and family are there to celebrate your commitment to your partner and they don't necessarily have to be tied to the legal formalities. Frankly as long as the registry part of this celebration happens once, I don't think that aspect of this post is a big deal.

I get why you chose to get married 2 years ago, and it's too bad you couldn't afford to have your big celebration at the time, but I personally think a registry is something you should sacrifice if that is how the chips fell. It would be a little off-putting to me as a guest to register for things that are supposed to be to start your married life together, when you have been married two years. I am curious as to how substantial your Amazon registry was, since you also "registered" for Disney (cash). I don't think that you are excused from the criticisms of a cash registry just because you also had an Amazon one.

That said, you don't even know what the gift is. How foolish will you feel if it is something you actually like? If not, as PP's have said, return, exchange, donate it, or throw it out.