Friends or Family?

My family has been helpful including my best friend. She is doing her best in helping me. However, my bridesmaids aren’t doing their job at all and I’m kind of disappointed. My fiancé hired his friend to coordinate our stuff for the wedding but she is not doing her job. At this point, I will most likely be an a*** and ask her not to help at all. She wasn’t going to do this for free. We were going to pay her, but at this point, I’m kicking her out.

My bridesmaids are the most unhelpful in this whole process. I have about one or two who periodically help out but then go back to being unreliable. They cause all the drama and it’s all over their outfit. My parents are helping out but my fiancé’s parents haven’t even offered a single thing not even moral support. Thank god for my wedding planner!!

View Quoted Comment Mine aren’t either and they’re causing me the most grief and stress. It’s so surprising when you pick your closest friends and then they act so differently than they usually are.

My parents have pretty much helped plan everything and his mom wants to help as well. My maid of honor and a few bridesmaids have also been in the loop and planning as well. So far no drama, let’s just hope it stays that way!

View Quoted Comment It’s so sad. I feel you. They have been so unreliable. Even when planning my bachelorette, none show any interest. My bff has to be messaging them cause none of them put any input. They even reply to the private message they have going on. My friend had to tell them to stop ignoring the messages and start replying. This will most likely be the first and last I include them in something very important as this.

My maid of honor is being super helpful, one of my bridesmaid as well but I have not gotten the full support i assumed I was going to get from my big fat family, if my mom would’ve still been alive maybe things would’ve flow much easier but unfortunately I have to deal with my wedding prep alone, my fiancé is helping as much as he can but it is not the same. I have not hire a planner yet but I am considering hiring one.

View Quoted Comment Mine are the same way! Do we have the same people in our parties lol! But I was told I was micro managing when I asked if they could please respond after reading the messages. They read them and don’t respond and they say it’s because they have other things going on in their lives besides my wedding. Okay but can you answer when you can at least instead of not at all?? I asked them all if they still wanted to be bridesmaids because I could just ask my sisters instead and they all felt offended I even asked but said they did want to still be bridesmaids and that they cared about me. No progress to be seen however. I’m at a loss.

My family is so big I had to really scale down on my friends. I also had to scale back on family and here in lies the problem. I have a feeling one of my cousins took back her RSVP because I didn't invite her mother father and brother, just her and her sister. I have a lot of aunts and uncles and I don't know her mother (my aunt) as well as I know my aunts sisters. I'm closer with the aunts I invited. I had to invite family from my father side that I had some sort of relationship with. I grew up with my mom side so I invited all my aunts out of courtesy and respect of my mom while passed almost six years ago . I invited cousins close to my age from both sides. We wanted 100 or less guest, what we could afford. My side alone is over 60! I know other family members will have a problem because I didn't invite specific people, or their kids- I have minimal children because this is an adult event.
At the end of the day I know drama is coming because of the decisions i made but i had to go by what we could afford and we can't have EVERYONE attend. So i feel like as a result a lot of my family have not even RSVP yes or no, and the date to do so is July 2nd. We set and early date because people have to fly in and we wanted to give ourselves time to invite friends that couldn't be on the main list. We sent invites out the beginning of April because we didn't do save the dates. My family can be very pretty so I know some are insulted that I didn't invite EVERYONE.

View Quoted Comment Lol I think we do have the same people. I hope all gets better. I may be popping the question about being sure they want to be bridesmaids. I have three of them in Mexico who are my cousins and try communicate as much as they can, but the rest are here and it’s awful. Let’s hope for the best. But no matter what, it will be your special day and you make sure not let them or anybody else ruin you. Shine bright babygirl!

Im not sure if its because my wedding is still a good year away but neither side has offered to do anything, all they do is just ask what i have planned so far and what ive chosen. Im like pretty sure as well that they're struggling to figure out if they're going to even come.. but honestly im a big planner so even if nobody offered to help, it wouldn't bother me.

So far there has been very little drama, except one of my future sister in law's who does not want to get her makeup done. She is beautiful but all of the bridesmaids have to have makeup.

My mother is both! She's doing everything to help and she's GREAT at it, and at the same time, is bringing the drama when it comes to certain things (guest list) and I'm in a hard place because my parents are helping with the costs.

Family is bringing most of the Drama. His and mines but mostly his. My friends have been the best throughout this process. My FH has also work my patience through this process as well. I love him so I look over the frustrations and I am sure he is doing the same.

No one has been really helpful so far. When others have been in the “Bride” role, I have asked what I could do to assist. I have not received the same in kind.

There was one former co-worker that I finally had to just shut down with, “If you want to help, then do so. If not, stop trying to figure out how to spend my money or get it into YOUR Wallet”!

So far, my family has been the most dramatic. My mother and sister, neither ever married, have so much to say about everything. The most support has been coming from a coworker I just met this year.

My parents have been the most helpful and have been keeping me on track and keeping me clam and have paid some of the wedding and his mom has been bring drama out of no where and keeps asking him if we are going to send invitations to these people and my budget on food is only for 100 guest. I had to tell him we can not invite any more people. We are at 84 guest ready that's not with plus ones or kids. Most of the guest are his family. Most of it is family and 2 of his friends that's it

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I agree. Communication Is a big deal. Why can't people just say I received your message and will respond _________ instead of me thinking it went into big hole in the universe!

My future in laws, especially my FMIL who is my FH step mom (and they aren’t close!) She helped me pick out my dress and gave me advice when I was designing my invites. They also ensured the venue was paid when the manager was being dodgy. They’re opening their home to let us stay free the two weeks we’re in town and are helping with the rehearsal plans... Next is his BM who is helping me plan the combo Bach trip, and who came during our planning weekend for tuxes and a wedding expo! No one else has offered to or has done anything to help...even my bridal party girls.

Family and the bridesmaids have been the most helpful! All the groomsmen have been causing so much drama, it’s truly surprised me. It’s quite sad really. 😢

Both are drama but both are helpful at same time.